HorsesAss.Org

Ggggggggooooooood morning.

• What an amazing headline. Congratulations to Mayor Wilson.
• Washington sheriffs, get your shit together.
• Pike Place being pedestrianized is not just a better experience it’s also good for businesses.

John Oliver: Prediction markets

The Late Show: Tonight on TMZ DC

Puppet Regime: The Strait of Hormuz helpline

Stephen: Get high with the Pope & Трамп’s deranged social media blitz & Kash Patel’s drinking problems

The Reign of Jeffrey Epstein’s Best Friend:

• The Resistance: ♫ This is What You Voted For ♬
• Knotheadusc: ♫ He’s Gonna Tear the White House Down ♬
• J-L Cauvin: The Dotard reacting to Netanyahu cancer
• Seth Meyers: Трамп’s latest Iran threat, Eric Трамп’s Pentagon grift, GOP gerrymandering backfires
• Bruce W. Nelson: ♫ Dotard, Please Resign ♬
• Jon Stewart: Трамп’s “Art of the Deal” Iran strategy…that isn’t working
• Stephen: Shrimp forever & Трамп claims he “would have won Vietnam,” & jet fuel running low
• Jimmy Kimmel: Трамп extends Iran ceasefire again, reads from Bible & Tucker Carlson apologizes for supporting him
• The God Show: Draft dodger Dotard claims he would have won Viet Nam quickly
• Lawrence O’Donnell: Only Трамп thinks threatening war crimes and committing war crimes “will be my honor”
• Tommy Campbell: Трамп’s DoorDash stunt backfires & RFK Jr’s raccoon story is INSANE
• John D. Cundle: ♫ Dotard, You Don’t ♬
• Patrick Fitzgerald: ♫ Hand Scar ♬:

• Steve Shives: Voter’s Remorse Helpline—blasphemy edition
• Jimmy Kimmel: Трамп’s unnecessary war drags on, he wants to gift himself Medal of Honor & Kash Patel bombshell
• Christopher Titus: The Strait Of VERMOUTH??
• John D. Cundle: ♫ Трамп—ME, The People ♬
• Bruce W. Nelson: ♫ Dementia Don Rambles On ♬
• Stephen: Iran to Трамп, “You’re losing” & condom prices are up & penis in the sky & Patel drunk on the job?
• Parody Project: ♫ Donny J., Go Away ♬
• Seth Meyers: Catching up….
• Michael Kosta: Трамп drags out Iran war as Hormuz blockade pokes holes in the condom industry
• Stephen: Трамп plans revenge on the press & No Negotiations & Spirit Bailout? And Bobby’s heavy breathing
• Chris Hayes: “The wheels are coming off.” Трамп already less popular than after Jan. 6
• Mazlinithegreat♫ Gamblin’ in Iran ♬
• Hitler Rants Parodies: Hitler is informed that Трамп has extended the ceasefire with Iran
• Jimmy Kimmel roasts Трамп & his MAGA minions at our alternative White House correspondents’ dinner
• Bruce W. Nelson: ♫ Look How Miserable Dotard Трамп Is! ♬
• JoJoFromJerz: The “Chosen One” marketing—Трамп’s newest religious branding
• The Late Show: Operation Pubic Fury
• Jen Psaki: Most Americans think Трамп is NOT mentally fit for office, FAUX News poll says
• Parody Project: ♫ Que Será Será (Cell Block 3) ♬
• J-L Cauvin: The Dotard announces 400th cease fire with Iran
• The Resistance: ♫ The Strait of Hormuz ♬

Ronny Chieng: D-list celebs & fringy influencers run for office in the midterms

Jimmy Kimmel: The week in unnecessary censorship

Roll Call: Congressional Hits and Misses of the week

LegalEagle: Marijuana law blows

And the Deplorable Sycophants:

• J-L Cauvin: The Dotard reacts to drunk Kash Patel
• The Resistance: ♫ He Don’t Love You Anymore ♬
• Bruce W. Nelson: ♫ The Bar is Always Low at Kash Patel’s FBI ♬
• JoJoFromJerz: The ultimate suck-ups—The GOP’s race to please Трамп
• Psychology Bites: Psychology of Трамп supporters
• Seth Meyers: Трамп’s approval hits all-time low, Kash Patel’s “freakouts,” Labor Secretary resigns
• Jordan Klepper: MAGA’s take on the Iran war & Трамп’s war with the Pope
• Marsh Family: ♫ He’s Very Unwel ♬:

• Bruce W. Nelson: ♫ Трамп’s B-team of Inept Negotiators ♬
• Michael Kosta: Kash Patel denies excessive drinking & Labor Secretary’s family plays HR violation bingo
• Rachel Maddow: Alex Jones’ Infowars to become a joke on purpose as accountability finally catches up
• J-L Cauvin: The Dotard reveals the truth about Marco Rubio & Cuba
• Stella Magz: Tucker Carlson is so brave….
• The God Show: Bless Waj Ali For DESTROYING Pete Hegseth’s pastor to his FACE
• LegalEagle: FBI Director sues journalists for reporting binge drinking
• Michael Kosta: John Phelan fired as Navy Secretary, replaced with witch-hunter Hung Cao
• Jimmy Kimmel: Kash Patel gets hammered, mouth-breather Kennedy, Трамп insists war is over & right-wingers blame Mamdani for Mets losing
• Mr. Newberger’s AI Funnies: ♫ I’M Fired ♬
• JoJoFromJerz: The apology tour—Tucker Carlson’s desperate pivot
• ONN: Fractures emerge between GOP’s pro-pedophilia and extremely pro-pedophilia wings
• John D. Cundle: ♫ Pete Bible Fiction—Quotes Tarantino like scripture ♬

The Late Show: Introducing Godorade

John D. Cundle: ♫ Vote Out the Clowns ♬

The God Show: Bless The Onion for buying InfoWars!

JoJoFromJerz: The insult to the officers who defended the Capitol

Last week’s Friday Night Multimedia Extravaganza can be found here.

Gosh, I really love Seattle in the Spring. Sorry in advance for the non-Seattle people reading this. It’s mostly one bus lane and all one part of the city.

• Denny Way bus lanes mean the end of the L8. They are going to be GR8. The critics are full of H8.
• The free pop-up clinic in Seattle Center is high demand on what’s usually its slowest day.

Good morning to everyone.

• Moar bike trails. Please and thank you.
• Get light rail to Ballard, please.
• Street improvement for Tacoma, sounds good.
• I would like a King County Assessor who is not a creep.
• One moratorium on data centers.

Please join us this evening as the Seattle Chapter of Drinking Liberally gets together over conversation and drinks. Tonight we will raise a glass in honor of former Seattle PI columnist Joel Connelly, who died last week at the age of 78. Joel was a regular at our DL until a few years ago. He was a friendly and calming presence, and was always willing to share with us his wisdom and recollections from a lifetime in politics and media.

We meet tonight and every Tuesday at the Roanoke Park Place Tavern, 2409 10th Ave E, Seattle. You’ll find us in the back room starting about 8:00pm.

Chapters of Living Liberally are all over the place…if you can’t make it to the Seattle chapter, stop by another chapter near you.

I have been riding my bicycle along the Ship Canal Trail. It’s relatively flat and connects with some other trails. Anyway, on Friday I go for a ride after work. I get to Fisherman’s Terminal and realized, oh shit, my wallet.

At this point, it’s dusk, so I go back to my apartment hoping to see it on the way. No luck, so I canceled my debit card. The next day, I was able to get a replacement at BECU. I also went to Westlake Station and picked up a new ORCA Card.

I get home and I’m trying to figure out how to transfer my account from the old ORCA Card to the new one, when I get a buzz. I answered it, and the people found my wallet and came to the apartment to give it back.

I mean! Come on. Incredibly grateful that they would do that. I was just back from getting a new card, so I was in a nice button down shirt and a tie on a Saturday. Fancy guy to give his wallet back to.

Steve Shives: Hungary just voted out its autocrat—Now it’s our turn

Roll Call: Congressional Hits and Misses of the week

Reign of The Felon Von Shitzenpantz:

• Jimmy Kimmel: Трамп throws a tantrum over his ballroom, feud with Pope continues & roadkill enthusiast RFK Jr
• John D. Cundle: ♫ The Man Who Knew Everything Wrong ♬
• Bruce W. Nelson: ♫ I Think About Трамп ♬
• Funny Songs & Song Parodies: Big Orange Man Boob
• Austin Nasso: Трамп addresses Iran war in Florida
• Stephen: President Трамп and The Doordash Grandma
• Parody Project: ♫ Трамп—The felon clown ♬
• Jimmy Kimmel: Трамп should be the new Ayatollah, no one believes his Jesus pic lie & MAGA reacts to Pope attacks
• The God Show: Bless Dr. Jesus for humiliating Трамп
• John D. Cundle: ♫ Stuck in the Strait with You (Трамп to the Left, Ayatollah to the Right) ♬
• LegalEagle: Трамп’s stupid ballroom ruled illegal
• Stephen: JD Vance fails & Трамп got nothing from Iran & our Savior-In-Chief
• Patrick Fitzgerald: ♫ Doctor, Doctor! Give me the news! ♬:

• Liberal Redneck: Nation shocked to find that history’s most megalomaniacal President thinks he’s God
• J-L Cauvin: The Dotard says “Jesus was like a Jewish doctor”
• Stephen: A just war of words with the Pope & great vengeance and furious anger
• Bruce W. Nelson: ♫ Let’s Send Трамп to Iran! ♬
• Lauren Mayer: ♫ ТрампChild ♬
• Christopher Titus: SUPERVILLAINS can’t stop won’t stop (best of)
• John D. Cundle: ♫ Трампflation ♬
• SNL: The Dotard making calls
• Bruce W. Nelson: ♫ Трамп’s low testosterone level blamed for Iran debacle ♬
• Stephen: In Трамп’s economy, Americans can’t afford 7-Eleven & a day beyond Трамп & JD Vance says The Pope Should Be Careful
• MockPolitrick: ♫ Трамп SPIRALS HARD as Grok’s Reality Check Goes VIRAL ♬
• John D. Cundle: ♫ The King of Wrong ♬
• Rachel Maddow: Трамп’s fear is palpable as authoritarian peer Orbán is resoundingly rejected in Hungary
• Lawrence O’Donnell: Трамп’s Iran war defined by “madman” posts as Jesus while telling Pope he’s wrong
• The Late Show: ♫ Antichrist Superstar ♬:

• John D. Cundle: ♫ The Man Who Bankrupted 4 Casinos… Now He’s Dealing World War III ♬
• Steve Shives: Трамп declares historic 17th victory in war with Iran
• Hitler Rants Parodies: Hitler is informed that Трамп posted a picture depicting himself as Jesus
• The Resistance: ♫ Nope, He Don’t Like The Pope ♬
• John D. Cundle: ♫ The Gospel According to Don ♬
• Patrick Fitzgerald: ♫ It’s a Shame ♬
• Bruce W. Nelson: ♫ Dollar Store Jesus ♬
• Jimmy Kimmel: Трамп attacks the Pope, thinks he’s Jesus & bashes Springsteen in his most bananas posting spree yet
• Christopher Titus: Shocking moments you missed in the Oval Office!
• John D. Cundle: ♫ Dr. No Good ♬
• Nick Offerman: How Трамп is turning America’s 250th into a tribute to himself
• Stella Magz: Paging Doctor Dotard….
• Desi Lydic FAUXplains Трамп’s holy war against the Pope:

• Bruce W. Nelson: ♫ The Dotard Трамп, The Anti-Christ ♬
• Jimmy Kimmel: Трамп lashes out at the Pope AGAIN, posts an A.I. Jesus pic AGAIN & distracts from Iran AGAIN!
• The God Show: Bless The Pope for smacking down The Dotard
• Puppet Regime: Трамп gets a “big, fat” concession from Xi
• John Di Domenico: Трамп explains the Pope, Jesus, and ‘My Jesus is rich’
• Patrick Fitzgerald: ♫ DoorDash Granny ♬
• John D. Cundle: ♫ Nacho President ♬
• The Late Show: ♫ They Not Pious ♬
• JoJoFromJerz: Трамп’s new career—Part-time messiah, full-time doctor?
• Bruce W. Nelson: ♫ Dotard Трамп is Simply Clueless ♬
• Lawrence O’Donnell: Трамп, who failed at buying Stormy Daniels’ silence, now seeks Iran deal he previously ripped up
• J-L Cauvin: The Dotard reacts to Viktor Orban defeat

Brenna Perez: Why the Iran deal fell through

Shirley Șerban: ♫ Nero—A History Song for Today ♬

More of the Worst Losers, Sycophants, and Grifters:

• Mr. Newberger’s AI Funnies: ♫ Most Famous Slovene ♬
• The Resistance: It’s On Us
• Ronny Chieng: U.S. and Iran wage a meme war as Pete Hegseth blasts “unpatriotic” media
• Stella Magz: JD Vance defends his woman’s honor….
• The God Show: Bless Pope Leo for smiting Pete Hegseth
• JoJoFromJerz: Quoting Pulp Fiction? Really?!
• Ross Childs: JD Vance vs. Peace with Iran
• Stephen: “He’s the Antichrist” & teleportation juice & America’s not making enough babies
• Bruce W. Nelson: ♫ The Трамп Cult—Anti-Christian and Anti-Democratic ♬
• Knotheadusc: ♫ Fired! ♬:

• The Late Show: A message from first lady Melanie Трамп
• JoJoFromJerz: MAGA implodes—Трамп turns on his closest loyalists
• SNL UK: Melanie Трамп plays two truths and a lie
• The Resistance: ♫ Nobody Likes J.D. Vance ♬
• Tommy Campbell: Melania denies Epstein ties….It’s ridiculous
• Bruce W. Nelson: ♫ Трамп and JD Vance sink Orbán’s re-election bid ♬
• Mr. Newberger’s AI Funnies: ♫ Send the Kush ♬
• The Resistance: ♫ It Ain’t Fun Being MAGA No More ♬
• Christopher Titus: Pete Hegseth: Secretary Of MANSCAPING! (Best of)
• Lawrence O’Donnell: RFK Jr. lied to Congress when he denied saying “every Black kid” should be “re-parented”
• Ronny Chieng: JD Vance laughs off Трамп’s Jesus AI & FEMA official teleports to a Waffle House?
• Jon Stewart: Трамп rages at Pope Leo, JD Vance fumbles Iran deal & Hungary ousts Viktor Orban
• SNL Weekend Update: Vance says U.S. and Iran peace talks ended & Melanie Трамп denies ties to Epstein & RFK Jr. new podcast

Christopher Titus: Why women hate us

Last week’s Friday Night Multimedia Extravaganza can be found here.

Good morning. No coat, just a sweater over a button to go for a walk. Spring is Springing, not to jinx it.

• Maaaaan, we need a new King County Assessor.
• Happy Black Earth Day coming up.
• Hopefully the state will do a better job of distributing mifepristone going forward.
• A fast ferry between Seattle and Tacoma would be rad way to commute. No shade to the train.
• Turning off the camera directly pointed at the Planned Parenthood is a step in the right direction, but there’s plenty more to do.

I admire everyone who rode their bikes yesterday. You are made of hardy stuff.

• I am in favor of removing as much parking as possible. Block 46 of Sylvester’s Plat in Olympia seems like a good place.
• The brutally of the Amazon warehouses.
• Pedestrianize for the World Cup. And more?
• NPI’s Spring Gala is coming up.
• 3 of the Spokane 9 are going to trial.

Make the best of a rainy evening! Stop by the Seattle Chapter of Drinking Liberally and join us in conversation and drinks.

We meet tonight and every Tuesday at the Roanoke Park Place Tavern, 2409 10th Ave E, Seattle. You’ll find us in the back room starting about 8:00pm.

Chapters of Living Liberally are all over the place…if you can’t make it to the Seattle chapter, stop by another chapter near you.

Good morning. I went to my first Mariners game of the year over the weekend. Good times.

I don’t know if the staff are wit the M’s or the stadium, but I do want to give them a shout out. I was there with someone who sometimes needs a wheelchair, and they were very accommodating. Sorry to vaguebook here but I do want to say they checked in without being obtrusive and generally very helpful.

Robert Reich: The California billionaire tax explained

Reign of The Felon Von Shitzenpantz:

• J-L Cauvin: The Dotard announces peace plan with Iran
• Bruce W. Nelson: ♫ Expert says “I’m Pretty Sure Трамп’s Dying” ♬
• Hitler Rants Parodies: Hitler is informed Трамп has threatened Iran with destruction
• Jimmy Kimmel: Трамп had NO IDEA Melania was making an Epstein statement & he’s back to making threats to Iran
• The Resistance: ♫ 2547—Time to Invoke the 25th Amendment ♬
• JoJoFromJerz: Трамп’s latest meltdown—The Truth Social post everyone is talking about
• The God Show: MAGA calls for Трамп’s impeachment for war crimes
• Jimmy Kimmel: Трамп chickens out after threatening a whole civilization with death & even crazies think he’s crazy
• Stephen: The fog of peace & how Bibi got Трамп to bomb Iran & JD Vance’s cringe call
• Bruce W. Nelson: ♫ Трамп—Old No-Nuts is SO Nuts (But Still He Loves Donuts) ♬
• Rachel Maddow: Report exposes a Трамп scheme to override midterm vote with bogus crisis
• Knotheadusc: ♫ Let’s Call the Whole Thing Off (Трамп Edition) ♬
• The Resistance: ♫ Gotta Take a Трамп (Right Now) ♬
• J-L Cauvin: The Dotard’s insane Easter message
• SNL Weekend Update: Трамп fires Bondi over Epstein Files & says he’ll bring Iran back to stone age
• Bruce W. Nelson: ♫ Behold the Holy Gas Prices—Risen Indeed! ♬:

• Executive Odors: ♫ Goldsphinchter ♬
• The Daily Show: Трамп puts “America First” with Iran war, closed Strait of Hormuz & recession worry
• JoJoFromJerz: “Civilization will die”—The truth about Трамп’s terrifying war deadline
• Stephen: Трамп threatens to rain hell on Iran’s civilians & Easter at the White House
• Jimmy Kimmel: Трамп’s totally UNHINGED Easter weekend, “ultimatum” for Iran & hospitalization rumors
• Liberal Redneck: So America is totally losing this war with Iran, right?
• Patrick Fitzgerald: ♫ Just Another TACO Tuesday ♬
• Lauren Mayer: ♫ TACO Tuesday ♬
• John D. Cundle: ♫ Just Another TACO Tuesday ♬
• Hitler Rants Parodies: Hitler is informed that Трамп has agreed a ceasefire with Iran
• LegalEagle: Трамп’s illegalist war gets illegaler
• J-L Cauvin: The Dotard declares himself a “smooth war criminal”
• Bruce W. Nelson: ♫ One Big Beautiful Obit ♬
• Lawrence O’Donnell: Трамп’s profane and perverse Iran social media post is why the 25th Amendment was written
• Knotheadusc: ♫ Still the Same (Трамп edition) ♬:

• The Resistance: ♫ Two Different People (Ideally) ♬
• Stella Magz: Трамп threatens to end Iranian civilization….
• J-L Cauvin: The Dotard prepares to bomb bridges in Iran
• The Resistance: ♫ Constitutional Optional ♬
• Jimmy Kimmel: Трамп declares total victory in Iran, aims to make big money & JD Vance calls the ceasefire fragile
• Bruce W. Nelson: ♫ “Genocide Don” Трамп’s Long-Desired Nickname ♬
• JoJoFromJerz: Трамп’s “Art of the Deal”—The war with Iran continues
• The Late Show: The goddamn White House Easter motherfuckin’ egg roll
• John D. Cundle: ♫ Трамп the Great Pretender—The Great Surrender ♬
• ScaredKetchup: ♫ Presidente Трампito sings—Трамп War Timeline ♬

Christopher Titus: Bruce Springsteen shuts down Трамп

Bruce Springsteen: ♫ Streets of Minneapolis ♬ (Live From Minneapolis):

Corrupt, Lawless, Losers:

• Bruce W. Nelson: ♫ You Lay With Трамп, You’re Gonna Get Screwed ♬
• LegalEagle: Bondi’s Out
• The Resistance: ♫ How To Spot A War Criminal ♬
• Mr. Newberger’s AI Funnies: ♫ Please Let Me Stay ♬
• Randy Rainbow: ♫ Not What They’re Paid For ♬:

• SNL Weekend Update: Kristi Noem’s husband on his bimbo scandal
• J-L Cauvin: The Dotard reacts to Melania’s Epstein speech
• Bruce W. Nelson: ♫ GOP Denies Knowledge of Трамп’s Insanity ♬
• The God Show: Bless the woman who called The Dotard a pedophile in front of Melanie
• ScaredKetchup: Melanie’s Epstein files presser—The rehearsal
• John D. Cundle: ♫ I Watched FAUX News Today ♬
• Patrick Fitzgerald: ♫ Bondi, Bye Bye! ♬:

• The Late Show: The Prez Ain’t Right
• JoJoFromJerz: Beyond the script—Breaking down Melanie’s first major 2026 speech
• Mr. Newberger’s AI Funnies: ♫ That War That Was Not A War ♬
• Bruce W. Nelson: ♫ Don’t Go Saying Melanie Knew Epstein! ♬
• Tommy Campbell: Kristi Noem’s husband and the “bimbofication” secret is a national security problem

Last week’s Friday Night Multimedia Extravaganza can be found here.

How is everyone?

• The Forest Service is good for forestry business. Such short sighted cuts.
• Let the health inspectors in to the immigrant detention center.
• Hey, stop deporting people who are doing good. And really anyone who isn’t here to do harm.
• The native plant sale is going on now at the UW.

Guys, I’m exhausted. Biking to Drinking Liberally and back is great. But! Sometimes I get an adrenaline rush, especially if I take a different route because of all of the construction on Eastlake. And so I got home at a reasonable time, but didn’t get to sleep for a while. I don’t know. I’m going to ride my bike more now that it’s nice out.

I don’t know, it’s much nicer than a car and quicker than the bus in many cases. Maybe it’s time to get an e-bike?

Please join us this evening as the Seattle Chapter of Drinking Liberally gets together for conversations over a drink. All are welcomed.

We meet tonight and every Tuesday at the Roanoke Park Place Tavern, 2409 10th Ave E, Seattle. You’ll find us in the back room starting about 8:00pm.

Chapters of Living Liberally are all over the place…if you can’t make it to the Seattle chapter, stop by another chapter near you.