HorsesAss.Org

Man, I don’t know if it’s just me getting older or something to do with the quarantine, but I am not sleeping well at all. I am still going to sleep and getting up at the same time as before. But now I am just exhausted all the time.

Anyway, wash your hands right now.

Cases of COVID-19 are increasing in Washington. It seems like this is to do with Memorial Day. Grand reopening maybe grand reclosing.

I don’t know if we’ll see future spikes based on the protests. It being outside, with masks, and in some cases spaced out, mitigates the spread. But big crowds and not always being able to keep distance isn’t great. I assume that we would have started hearing about cases if they were happening in large numbers.

Anyway, stay safe and wash your hands right now.

Robert Reich: Who’s really looting America?

ТрампPlague:

• Courtney Jaye: Babygate
• Bruce W. Nelson: Cows, Fences and The Dotard Трамп
• The Late Show: Ghosts of Confederate soldiers have new military base name ideas for Трамп
• Bill Maher: New Rule—Democracy’s safe word
• Bruce W. Nelson: Put your mask on!
• Trevor: Coronavirus is on the upswing
• Lars von Retriever: MetalTrump–Dig (Mudvayne)
• Bruce W. Nelson: Bunker Room
• Lauren Mayer: Ivanka is the new Karen:

• Courtney Jaye: STFU, Ivanka
• The Late Show: Platitudes generator can’t handle Ivanka Trump’s commencement speech
• Bruce W. Nelson: Babygate!
• Seth Meyers: Трамп defends the Confederacy, complains about polls
• Robert Reich: The deadly FAUX News-Трамп syndicate
• Jimmy Kimmel: Трамп’s back out, COVID sex guidelines & NASCAR flag ban
• Courtney Jaye: Fuck this fucking president
• Bruce W. Nelson: Bunker fevor

Courtney Jaye: FAUX News is the devil

The Night the Lights Went Out on Georgia’s Voters:

• Stephen: Voter suppression plagues Georgia’s primary
• Trevor: Georgia’s disastrous primary
• The Late Show: Think you can get past Georgia’s voter suppression boss?

Trevor: Joe Biden on healing the country and acknowledging weaknesses

Black Lives Matter:

• Stephen: Jon Batiste on leading a musical march for justice
• Trevor: Confederate symbols are coming down
• Jonathan Mann: Jackboot
• Samantha Bee: America’s long-standing tradition of police brutality
• Daily Show: FAUX News is suddenly anti-protest
• The Late Show: A special message from Antifa
• Randy Rainbow: The Bunker Boy:

• Seth Meyers: Trump sinks in polls as protesters call to defund the police
• Trevor: Трамп doubles down and Democrats respond to protests
• Stephen: Megan Rapinoe’s parents taught her that you need to help people, period.
• Courtney Jaye: Bunker Boy
• Seth Meyers: Трамп and the police lash out at the Black Lives Matter protests
• Trevor: Joe Biden on reforming the police
• Jimmy Kimmel: Трамп’s “Army,” Mitt Romney marches & Americans come together
• Stephen: Emmanuel Acho—Being anti-racist means calling out racism wherever you see it
• Jonathan Mann: The Capitol Hill autonomous zone
• John Oliver: Police
• Sarah Cooper: How to bunker
• Trevor: Cops meet police brutality protests with more police brutality
• Stephen: Trump openly insults Black Americans by scheduling MAGA rally on Juneteenth in Tulsa, OK
• Jimmy Kimmel: Трамп tweets conspiracy theory & cousin Micki’s words of hope
• The USA Singers: The Ballad of George Floyd:

• Samantha Bee: It’s time to defund the Police
• Trevor: America protests police brutality and systemic racism
• The Late Show: Beware…The elderly Antifa!
• Mark Fiore: Defunding everything but the police
• Stephen: Calls to defund the police intensify while Трамп attacks Buffalo man assaulted by the cops
• Trevor: What should we do about police unions?

Hasan Minhaj: The news industry is being destroyed

Last week’s Friday Night Multimedia Extravaganza can be found here.

Higgldy Piggledy,

The CHAZ has anarchy.

Building something without

The police.

.

However tenuous

The claims of

Autonomy

I hope they won’t cease.

(Also, wash your hands right now)

Seattle, COVID-19 testing is available and free. There are locations in SoDo and Aurora Avenue North. If you are showing symptoms or have been exposed to someone with coronavirus (including having been at the crowded protests) you can sign up.

In any case, please wash your hands right now.

Christ. You can’t just. I mean. It’s bad enough what the police are doing. But random civilians driving into, and shooting into, crowds. What a shit. Just an absolute, unparalleled shit.

Anyway, wash your hands right now.

Trevor: A look back at the legacy of stop-and-frisk in New York City.

ТрампPlague:

• John Oliver: Voting by mail
• The Late Show: Melania needs a new smile machine
• Now This: Trump waives environmental protection regulations
• Bruce W. Nelson: The legend of slimy Don and the wreck of the ship “America”
• J-L Cauvin: The Dotard Трамп has a new doctor for America
• The Late Show: New Jersey makes a bid for Трамп’s relocated convention
• Jimmy Kimmel: Трамп attacks Mattis and builds White House fence
• Bill Maher with Rosa Brooks and Michael Steele: Blood in the streets next November?
• Vox: Why Covid-19 is more AND less deadly than we knew
• Sarah Cooper: Трамп on how to bible
• John Di Domenico: Трамп demands voter fraud, ballot harvesting & children be OUTLAWED!
• Bruce W. Nelson: If Трамп were a ship he would be the Titantic
• J-L Cauvin: Трамп responds to Obama’s speech

The Daily Show: Eight times America surprised Trevor.

The Dotard Fiddled While America Burned:

• Seth Meyers: Mattis Denounces Трамп, Cotton calls for deploying troops against protests
• Late Night: Pained historical comparison cowboy
• Conan: Van Jones on George Floyd, police brutality, & what comes next
• Bill Maher: Is America great enough for you yet?
• NY Times: We’re sick and tired—Voices From Minneapolis protests
• The Late Show: The gospel according to Don
• College Humor: Tide CEO says soap isn’t medicine
• Late Night: Amber Ruffin’s experience with the police—Skipping in Chicago
• Now This: Michigan Sheriff joins protesters marching for George Floyd
• James Corden: Malcolm Corden teaches Трамп how to hold the bible
• J-L Cauvin: Трамп promises to dominate Jesus Christ
• Foundation Singers: HELL! Трамп, George Floyd & protesters:

• Stephen: After days of unrest, America needs moral leadership. Instead, we have The Dotard Трамп
• Jimmy Kimmel: Jimmy Kimmel on protests, Трамп’s bible photo op & white privilege
• Seth Meyers: Michael Che talks about the Black Lives Matter protests
• Hasan Minhaj: How coronavirus broke America
• Conan: Statement on the killing of George Floyd
• Stephen: Trump sics military on peaceful protesters and clergy to make way for bible photo op
• The Late Show: God photo-bombs Трамп
• Late Night: Amber Ruffin’s experience with the police—When I tell you to stop, you stop
• WaPo: Here’s how to identify law enforcement officers and National Guard units
• The Daily Show: Experience the upheaval of the 1960’s all over again
• Bruce W. Nelson: Bunker bitch
• Stephen: America’s citizens will not be silenced by government intimidation
• James Corden and Reggie Watts: It’s time for change in the US
• Seth Meyers: Трамп threatens to deploy military in response to protests
• Lauren Mayer: I’m a Jew (but I know that ain’t Christian), bible photo-op edition:

• Jonathan Mann: I am anti fascist and the President says i’m a terrorist
• Jimmy Kimmel: Trump fumes over bunker & bible photo op
• Stephen: Chris Hayes—Трамп’s “Enemy of the people” rhetoric has put the press in danger
• Conan: W. Kamau Bell on #BlackLivesMatter & the importance of showing your work
• Late Night: Amber Ruffin’s experience with the police—Driving as a teen
• J-L Cauvin: The Dotard finally addresses the protests
• Stephen: Sen. Cory Booker talks race, empathy, and his legislation to stop abuses of power by law enforcement
• Mark Fiore: Operation Photo Op
• Jimmy Kimmel: Wanda Sykes on Black Lives Matter, quarantine with her twins & Twitter feud with Scott Baio
• The Late Show: Трамп’s speech has RoboCop thinking about a career change
• J-L Cauvin: Bunker Трамп addresses the nation
• Stephen: Chris Hayes—You couldn’t find a worst person for this moment
• Late Night: Amber Ruffin’s experience with the police—It’s a new day
• Jimmy Kimmel: Shaquille O’Neal on George Floyd, discrimination & talking to his sons
• Hasan Minhaj: We cannot stay silent about George Floyd:

• Seth Meyers: Трамп’s deranged response to the George Floyd protests
• Jonathan Mann: Did you hear what happened in Boston
• Stephen: Shockingly brutal police tactics deployed nationwide as protests unite Americans of all backgrounds
• Bill Maher: The blue wall of silence
• WaPo editorial: The rot in policing has spread beyond just ‘a few bad apples’
• The Late Show: GOP Senators speak out after Трамп gasses U.S. citizens
• Vox: Protests aren’t what they look like on TV
• James Corden: Dr. Michael Eric Dyson discusses civil unrest across America
• Trevor breaks down reparations & white privilege
• J-L Cauvin: The Dotard Трамп has the strongest sympathy
• Bruce W. Nelson: Трамп and his bunker, and the Devil and Hell
• Stephen: Dictator fanboy Трамп gets his wish as military vehicles roll down the streets of Washington
• Late Night: Amber’s minute of fury—Police violence against peaceful protestors

Wyatt Cenac: Segregation problems and school integration

Last week’s Friday Night Multimedia Extravaganza can be found here.

I am glad that Tacoma is taking the death of Manuel Ellis at the hands of a Tacoma police officer seriously. It seems to have taken a video (and the work of many people on the ground). Still I hope his family and community get some kind of justice.

And please wash your hands right now.

Biden	Trump
> 99.9% probability of winning	< 0.1% probability of winning
Mean of 354 electoral votes	Mean of 184 electoral votes

It has been mid-May since I published one of these analyses. back then, Biden led Trump in the electoral college with a mean of 348 to 190 votes.

Now, with over 40 new polls, Biden still leads. In the 10,000 simulated elections, Biden won all 10,000 times. Biden received (on average) 354 to Trump’s 184 electoral votes. If the election was today, we would expect Biden to win with a greater than 99.9% probability.

Here is the distribution of electoral votes [FAQ] from the simulations:
[Read more…]

The other day, a helicopter was circling over my neighborhood. It was during the day, and not particularly close to any protest that I was aware of. The urban core has more helicopters since the George Floyd murder.

Anyway, a crow that lives in one of the trees near my apartment and that crow was not having it. It stayed cawing at the helicopter for like an hour. Wir wir wir. Caw caw caw. Going to protest kind of feels like being that crow. It may or may not be making a difference, but it would be worse to say nothing.

This isn’t a great metaphor, but it would be great if you wash your hands right now.

Dear Mayor Durkan (cc Chief Best),

While I have many problems with the police response to the protests over the weekend, this email is about one aspect. I read with horror about the rifles that briefly went missing on Saturday. Shame on the city for bringing rifles to a protest.

Were the police planning on getting into a shootout with protesters? However much property damage and calamity there may have been, there is no situation where having rifles is an improvement. It is horrible policy on its own. It is also bad symbolism at a protest of deadly police violence. I urge you to not bring rifles to future civilian protests.

Thank You

Carl Ballard

(Not included in the letter, wash your hands right now.)

Lauren Mayer: “One Plate at a Time”.

Bill Maher: All bets are off

ТрампPlague:

• The Daily Show: 100,000 accomplished
• Trevor: A Costco face mask showdown
• J-L Cauvin: The Dotard Трамп wants essential churches open!
• Vox: How coronavirus spreads outdoors vs. indoors
• Jimmy Kimmel: The Dotard wants to SHUT DOWN Twitter
• Michael Kosta meets the Grim Reaper
• Bruce W. Nelson: “Trumps” (with apologies to Joyce Kilmer)
• Barack Obama: “Pissed Away”:

• Daily Show: Трамп’s totally not weird way of standing
• J-L Cauvin: Трамп Tuesdays #5
• Bruce W. Nelson: Трамп blames Obama in song
• Late Night storytime: Трамп family quarantine
• Jimmy Kimmel: Трамп golfs & pool parties in the Ozarks
• J-L Cauvin: Трамп fights voting by mail fraud and masks
• Mother Jones: The racist history behind Трамп’s violent tweet
• Full Frontal: The Pandemic Diaries
• Mark Fiore: Human capital stock
• J-L Cauvin: The Dotard trashes his supporters in leaked phone call
• Bruce W. Nelson: Ignore the experts, and listen to Трамп’s gut
• Daily Show: Microsoft Excel—Coronavirus Edition
• David Crosby: “What are their names”
• Red State Update: CHLOROQUINE (Parody of John Deere Green):

• Hasan Minhaj: Kamala Harris discusses COVID-19 and the election
• Roy Wood Jr.: Tired of wearing a mask? Leo Deblin has the solution
• Vox: What Bill Gates hopes we learn from coronavirus
• Bruce W. Nelson: Donald Trump vaccine (available to Americans, November 3, 2020)
• J-L Cauvin: Happy Memorial Day from The Dotard
• AJ+: A tale of two pandemics
• Jimmy Kimmel: Трамп’s Twitter feud with Twitter
• Trevor: Animals in the time of coronavirus

Now This: Michelle Obama surprises students engaged in voter registration.

Hasan Minhaj: The legal marijuana industry is rigged

Roll Call: Congressional hits and misses of the week.

Black Lives Matter:

• Now This: Former V.P. Joe Biden remarks on the killing of George Floyd
• Trevor: George Floyd, Minneapolis protests, Ahmaud Arbery & Amy Cooper
• Now This: CNN reporter and crew arrested live on-air in Minneapolis
• Vice News: Anti-police brutality protests are going national even in a pandemic
• Jimmy Kimmel: Jimmy Kimmel on George Floyd, riots in Minneapolis & Трамп’s violent stupidity.
• Now This: Minnesota AG Keith Ellison responds to the killing

Robert Reich: Robert Reich’s advice to the Class of 2020.

Vice News: Navajo Nation may finally get a better shot at voting in the presidential election

Last week’s Friday Night Multimedia Extravaganza can be found here.

A few months after the initial need, this week the stimulus package finally got help to me. The stimulus check arrived. And, more important to me, the company I work for finally had its PPP loan approved. So that’s good.

It is still frustrating. These things should have happened sooner. I have enough savings and if worst came to worst, I could have moved in with family. So the delay wasn’t bad for me (except for the stress of not knowing about my job) but it really should have been faster for people who needed it right away.

Anyway, go wash your hands right now.

Lauren Mayer: It’s not nice to screw Mother Nature.

Stephen chats with Joe Biden, Part I.

Stephen chats with Joe Biden, Part II.

Hasan Minhaj: What happens if you can’t pay rent?

Roll Call: Doggy doo, rucksacks and Starbucks—Congressional hits and misses of the week.

ТрампPlague:

• The Late Show: Catty Kombat final round—The Dotard Трамп vs. Nancy Pelosi
• Seth Meyers: Trump attacks vote-by-mail, refuses to wear a mask
• J-L Cauvin: Трамп appoints James Woods to his cabinet!
• Bruce W. Nelson: Obamagate (the song)
• Robert Reich: A tale of two pandemics
• The New Yorker: The rise of Sheriffs opposing lockdown
• Jaboukie Young White: Rich people in the time of corona
• Stephen: Muzzled By Трамп, the CDC releases watered down guidelines for reopening
• Randy Rainbow: DISTRACTION!:

• Trevor: Top 20 quarantine tips
• John Di Domenico: Трамп meets with top religious leaders demands churches open now!
• Sarah Cooper: How to hydroxychloroquine
• The Late Show: Trump’s miracle drug—side effects may vary
• SNL: Dr. Birx Ad
• Trevor: Why are we still having the mask debate?
• J-L Cauvin: Donald Trump reviews Joe Biden on The Breakfast Club
• Stephen: Our positively negative President says “We’ll put out the fires” of any second waves of infection
• Bruce W. Nelson: Hail to our Hydroxychloro Queen!
• Jimmy Kimmel with another quarantine monologue
• The Late Show: Mike Pompeo’s aide mixes up his errands
• Jordan Klepper: Standing up for the anti-anti-lockdown movement
• Seth Meyers: Трамп says he’s taking hydroxychloroquine
• J-L Cauvin: Trump Tuesdays—Episode 4
• Trevor with Madeleine Albright: Diplomacy during coronavirus
• Bill Maher: Entrance strategy
• The Late Show: We know why Mike Pompeo wanted the Inspector General fired
• Bruce W. Nelson: Something great’s going to happen:

• The Daily Show: FAUX News doesn’t think this man is fit to e President
• Mark Fiore: MAGA Masks!
• Jimmy Kimmel: Трамп is “Man of the Year” & “King of Ventilators”
• Stephen: Трамп fires State Dept. IG to protect Mike Pompeo & reveals he’s taking hydroxychloroquine
• The Late Show: Human-cow hybrids may provide the cure to COVID-19
• Trevor: The Mike Pompeo scandal & Трамп’s tantrum over mail-in ballots
• Seth Meyers: Obama speaks out about Трамп’s coronavirus failures
• J-L Cauvin: Трамп congratulates his law school daughter
• John Di Domenico: “Testing is OVERRATED and not needed!”
• The Late Show: Трамп calls Obama incompetent & falls down a manhole
• The Second City PSA: It’s Okay
• Trevor: Vaccine updates and Трамп fires another inspector general
• Jimmy Kimmel: Does Трамп have a death wish?
• Nancy Pelosi on unapproved drugs and Трамп’s “weight group”
• Bruce W. Nelson: Amazing medical tips from Трамп
• The Foundation Singers: “Like a Kidney Stone”:

• The Late Show: Mike Pompeo’s aide mixes up his errands
• WaPo: COVID-19 myths debunked by Congressional Candidate Qasim Rashid
• J-L Cauvin: The Dotard Трамп delivers commencement speech for class of 2020
• Stephen: Трамп claps back after Pelosi says the “morbidly obese” President shouldn’t take hydroxychloroquine
• Dr. Seema Yasmin: Doctor explains how fast a COVID-19 vaccine could be created
• Vox: One reason why coronavirus hits black people the hardest
• Trevor: Трамп takes hydroxychloroquine
• Jon Oliver: Coronavirus VII—Sports
• Bruce W. Nelson: He’s Just a Victim (No one’s suffered like The Dotard Трамп)
• The Late Show: GOP recruits pro-Трамп doctors to support reopening push

Bill Maher: New Rule—Prime boss.

Winlar: Strip mall zoo.

Jonathan Mann: Climb the rope! Thanks, China (Ben Sasse Commencment remix).

Trevor: President Obama speaks to the Class of 2020.

Last week’s Friday Night Multimedia Extravaganza can be found here.

Stop sweeping homeless encampments. Gah. There are no good solutions until we can build a lot more housing. But Jesus Christ on the cross, can we not? Especially in a pandemic, but even after.

Anyway, wash your hands right now.