Okay, I have to ask: do any teenage girls get their fashion advice from Seattle Times editorials?
Can’t Bring Yourself to Type the Word “Ass”?
Eager to share our brilliant political commentary and blunt media criticism, but too genteel to link to horsesass.org? Well, good news, ladies: we also answer to HASeattle.com, because, you know, whatever. You're welcome!
I’m somewhat embarrassed that The Times seems to know more about what the kids are up to than I do.
***********************
In other news:
Bet you’ll never read a Times Editorial telling rich people to pay their bills!
Joni Balter?
In other news, 55% of Americans can’t define the word ‘socialist’.
http://www.nationalreview.com/.....abel-obama
Can anyone show any major policy where Obama is to the left of Nixon? Show your work.
Feminism, in the twenty teens
puffed up lips, tatooed mascara, thongs with anal cleft tatoos, breast implants, platform heels, and now .. faux doe eyes!
Sarah Palin for President!
BTW
Assuming some of the HA readers have tweeners, here is a great place to get a great price on eye balls!
http://www.mycandyeyes.com/
http://mycirclelens.com/
Der, Goldy. They’re for the parents. Now moms all over the region can say, “sorry hon, the Seattle Times says no.” This may breed resentment in the next generation, but they’ll all get their news via brain chip so fuck them, amirite?
@4
future sluts of America.
ah, a better topic than our weekly dope post by doper Lee
Imagine this …
A TV Ad
Guy and Gal meet, date in his 84 Malibu. Clinton campaign is in background.
Guy and Gal wed, drive into their future in a new Camaro.
Grand parents smile, sitting in their Buick. Bush gives aircraft carrier speech.
Guy rushes Gal to Hospital for first child, Obama logos in background. That Camaro is getting old and small.
Guy and Gal, Babe in arms, show up at Chevy dealership to buy an SUV.
Gal drives Babe to kindergarten and braces. Babe takes driving lessons in the old SUV.
Babe drives to the beach party in the SUV. She glances in mirror, we see her faux doe eyes framed by luscious eye lash implants. Her breasts bounce intriguingly, held only barely by the twin triangles of her minikini. A handsome dark-skinned guy, Dilip Kumar drives up in a restored ‘Vette.
Babe sits at her makeup table, putting lipstick on her new Angelina Joli lips, puffy and succulent.
Babe is a BABE in her two piece prom dress … cut out to show ass cleft tatoo of roses, full breasts budding in a bullet bra, and pink hair! Dilip proudly drives Babe to prom in a super sleek Camaro Volt as OnStar opens the convertible top.
Dad. Mom and Dilip sit in audience as Babe graduates Summa cum Laude from Beck University. Sarah Palin’s commencement address is overshadowed as the rich lipped, wide-eyed valedictorian talks of her love for country. Dad and Mom proudly give Dilip and Babe the keys to their new Hummer Volt.
Scene shifts to DC. A Cadillac limo appears in front of hotel. Dad, Mom, and Dilip walk the red carpet and enter the Caddy Limo. Holding Dilip’s hand, is three-year old Radha.
The car arrives at Pennsylvania Ave, there are crowds, and special seating for the family in the Caddy limo.
Then
“Ladies and Gentlemen, … the President of the United States!”
Babe takes the podium, tattoos hidden behind her short skirted business suit, legs encased in pin striped nylon, piercings of nose and tongue long healed, but .. still those gorgeous lips and huge eyes!
@9
Pretty good, but I suspect people won’t be so prone to hide tattoos or piercings in 40 years. Or for that matter undergoing a revival.
yes…just what we need..more chicks with tramp stamps on their lower back.
Gleeman, do you have a tramp stamp?
Max @ 11
Do you ever take a weekend off from being an asshole? Any holidays at all?
every day is a holiday and everyday is the weekend!
I do know a lot of kids who would wear these things (my wife’s kids and their friends introduced me to anime and manga a long time ago), and the basic idea here is to use caution when applying cosmetic contacts. Like anything else you’d do around your own eyes. Same goes for cutting up chiles. Yet another waste of ink and paper from the Times.
Use of cosmetic, soft contacts is rarely dangerous when used properly…but since when can you trust a teenager in matters of hygiene :)
The wide-eyed look in fashion is hardly a new thing. French courtiers were known to put a dilute extract of the Belladonna / nightshade plants in their eyes to dilate them and give them that same wide-eyed look. It is purported that extended use could cause blindness.
The issue with the assorted bimBo branding of tween aged girls is a lot more serious than whether they get an eye infection. I find it hard to imagine a girl who goes through this sort of thing, esp. the physical alterations, ever finding herself as the feminists once believed women should do.
The phenomena are not limited to tween teen girls. Boys who get themselves tied into gangs, wielding chains and guns, … they likely also have a life long problem with self view.
Oh well, back to my LEGO set. Too hot to think today!
@15 bARBIE dOLLS
I am nit terribly worried about eye infections, BUT molding a little mgirl into a Barbie doll does worry me.
Nothing says “hey, I’m unemployable” like a bunch of tats and body piercings…especially on guys.
They’re talking to the choir- I’m always thinking “Lady Gaga in her “Bad Romance” video.”
19
Whate’er your political views, I’ve gotta say I like your moniker.
@19,
Now that’s funny! Much funnier than anything ever said by the arschloch.
BTW Goldy, this editorial will give the ‘rents something to think about if they see their daughter’s friends wearing those contacts.
Are any of your daughter’s friends doing strange things lately? Did this editorial make you think about it?
SJ
you are brlll, you should have a blog of your own, preferably one with spellcheck and large fonts.
20 it was given to me by Stan Boreson, the Seattle conservative intellectual of the 1950’s & 60’s
21
your preoccupation with Goldy’s daughter has always creeped me out. If I didn’t have knowledge of your involvement with the 7th Day cultists of Waco, maybe I’d be a little less disturbed. Maybe you should keep it political around here, and shut up about the children.
@21 Hey Puddy –
I posted this, not Goldy. So I think it’s safe to say his daughter had nothing to do with it.
Yes Geov, you wrote it. Questions are still relevant!
Fool@22, Ask Goldy has Puddy ever creeped his daughter? Puddy has only said positive things about the little Goldstein. Ask the arschloch for confirmation.
Where did Puddy get involved with David Koresh? You can ask the arschloch on that one too!
You are a moron.
Well, there ‘aint no time to wonder why
Whoopee! We’re all gonna die!
22
It’s too bad the species known as “conservative intellectual” no longer exists. Indeed, is there a better oxymoron than “conservative intellectual”?
@25
Yes the Gulf spill is bad, yes the apparent news blackout is obnoxious, but over the top scaremongering like this has little to no place.
The chances of an asteroid hitting the Earth or a supervolcano explosion are much higher than the Gulf spill turning into another Permian extinction event.
@18
Actually not so much anymore, at least in the technology, entertainment, or sporting goods industries. I predict in a few years even lawyers or political candidates with visible tattoos and piercings will hardly raise eyebrows.
Like the new First Lady of Germany, Bettina Wulff, for instance. Of course she wasn’t elected, but it’s a step forward. The media over there was all agog about the ink on her right shoulder. Still looking for a good picture of it.
@25
thanks for the early morning chuckle.
Question: will Algore figure out a way to make millions off of this, just like he did for his globull worming scam?
@30 I like a good DOOM!!! story every now and again.
@27 Seems obvious enough to me that I was posting that in fun.
@31
Sorry sometimes it is hard to tell here in the cesspool. There are a number of people who will post the craziest shit with a straight face.
@32
No problem.
Seattle Times is more irrelevant then Goldy?
@26 It’s too bad the species known as “conservative intellectual” no longer exists. Indeed, is there a better oxymoron than “conservative intellectual”?
“Honest attorney”
Bill Kristol is a conservative intellectual giant.
↑↑↑↑↑
Oxymoron
At least it is today. That hasn’t always been the case.
Michael spews @37:
Take off your partisan blinders. Kristol graduated manga cum laude, in three years, from Harvard. He has a Ph.D, also from Harvard, in government. You may disagree with Kristol’s politics, but his credentials clearly classify him as an “intellectual”.
Most of the time I disagree with Paul Krugman, but clearly he’s an “intellectual”. In both cases, just being smart doesn’t make either of them right all the time.
Crusader @ 34: Relevent or not, it’s rather ironic that Goldy may be making more of a profit off of his little blog than the Seattle Times is making in their entire operations.
Since the Seattle Times is not a publically-traded entitity it doesn’t have to release it’s numbers, but from the scattered reports we keep getting in from various sources (including court filings during it’s battle with the P.I.), and the Blethen’s family incessent whinning about how Google is threatening their very survival, it appears that they are continuing to lose money.
Of course, that doesn’t mean that the Blethens are in the poor house. They will continue to skim off quite a bit of revenue, primarily as salaries and bonuses, even while the ship is sinking. Their next step will be to extract even more concessions from the workers – those that actually write, edit, layout, print, and distribute the paper – so they can continue to live in the manner to which they have become accustomed, at least for a few more years.
@39
begging for donations to pay the bills = profit?
huh?
@39
Ya gotta be kiddin.
In the process of doing your thorough investigative work perhaps you’ll discover exactly how many of HA’s blogger’s are paid a salary (forget 401K and health benefits!). And less those donations noted @40 perhaps you’ll be able to tell us whether Goldy would even have a salary?