HorsesAss.Org

The headline is a little off (he was held in one facility rather than transferred to a different facility). And even if it was accurate, we’re not as a society going to be as worried about violent criminals in jail too long as we are with the early release scandal that happened earlier. Still and all, I hope he’s the only one. And we should have better safeguards going forward.

1 Samuel 5:6
But the hand of the LORD was heavy upon those of Ashdod, and He destroyed them and smote them with hemorrhoids.

Discuss.

David Hawkings’ Whiteboard: What’s a whip?.

George W. Bush does the Not the White House Correspondents’ Dinner

Mental Floss: The history of mowing lawns.

Putin’s Cock Holster:

• Stephen: Трамп on Civil War history.
• Seth Meyers: A closer look at how hard it is to be President.
• Keith Olbermann: Трамп assault on free speech
• Bill Maher: The day the presidency died:

• Extended cut version of Трамп’s CNN-banned TV ad.
• Trevor Noah: How to make Трамп care about climate change
• Keith Olbermann: Трамп is panicking on Russia
• Late Show: Трамп out of context.
• Susie Sampson: 100 days…Трамп makes you angry enough to be inspired?
• Stephen: This monologue goes out to you, Mr. President
• Rachel Maddow and Seth Meyers: Rachel’s phone call with Трамп
• Cory Booker: Why Donald Трамп should try being nice on Twitter
• 100 greatest accomplishments of Трамп’s first 100 days
• Bill Maher: New Rule–The lesser of two evils.
• Stephen: The new U.S. Constitution as written by Трамп
• Samantha Bee: All the President’s leaks
• Olbermann: Why won’t the press ask Трамп questions?
• Stephen: God weighs in on Трамп’s religious liberty executive order

Trevor: The one who got away.

Samantha Bee roasts the Presidents.

Commandant Comey:

• Stephen: James Comey speaks.
• Keith Olbermann: Is a Grand Jury now looking into Трамп?
• Seth Meyers: Comey testifies

Samantha Bee: FAUX News In Memoriam

PsychoSuperMom: Facts Have A Liberal Bias.

Seth Meyers: Airline deregulation.

“Rep. Jim Martin“:

Samantha Bee: Alt White House Correspondences’ Dinner.

The House GOP Congresscritters Are Literally Trying to Kill People:

• Late Show: Night of the living bill
• Jimmy Kimmel reveals details of his his son’s birth & heart disease
• Full Frontal: unboxing the AHCA
• Bill Maher: Jimmy Kimmel and Трампcare.
• Trevor Noah: Fucking unbelievable–the GOP shoves health care through the House
• Seth Meyers: A closer look at House Republicans rushing Трампcare through
• What you need to know about the Трампcare bill
• Keith Olbermann: The shame and cruelty of the GOP
• Stephen: GOP celebrates 1/3 of its healthcare victory
• What you may have missed about the Трампcare bill

Jimmy Dore: Rick Steeves invests in housing homeless.

Samantha Bee: What is facts>?

Last week’s Friday Night Multimedia Extravaganza can be found here.

So the House Republicans passed a monstrosity of a health care plan. I normally don’t talk about national stuff unless there’s a local angle. But honestly: Fuck the entire GOP. I know, some of them didn’t vote for it. And I’m sure there will be a much tougher road in the Senate. But, you know. Fuck every last one of them.

If you’re represented by someone who voted for it, you might want to let them know that fuck them (but more polite, maybe?). If you’re represented by someone who voted against this shit show of a bullshit bill, please thank them. If you’re represented by Dave Reichert who opposed it on the House floor but supported something similar in committee, you might want to let him know that you see him.

I know it has been successful in many localities, but I just do not like the soda tax Seattle is considering. It always feels very fat shaming whenever people trot it out. Here in Washington where we don’t have an income tax, it seems like a strange place to use your time and energy to push.

Please join us this evening for drinks, conversation, and perhaps some alt-history alt-lessons at the Seattle Chapter of Drinking Liberally.

We meet every Tuesday at the Roanoke Park Place Tavern, 2409 10th Ave E, Seattle. You’ll find us in the small room at the back of the tavern beginning about 8pm.

Can’t make it to Seattle? Check out one of the other 230 chapters of Living Liberally, including nineteen in Washington state, three in Oregon and one in Idaho. Find, or go out and start, a chapter near you.

I’ve seen a lot of how-to-survive May Day posts in the local media recently. Or more accurately, I’ve been seeing a lot of headlines about them on social media and rolling my eyes about the whole thing. So here’s A Downtown Resident’s Guide to Survive May Day:

1) Are you a window Downtown? If so, congrats on being able to read, and thanks for choosing HA. There is a small chance someone will throw a brick at you and if that happens a decent chance that brick will smash you. That sucks, but your owner probably has insurance and at least you’ll get to be on TV continuously for the next few weeks and then in perpetuity ahead of May Day every year. There’s also a chance that someone will spray graffiti on you. That’s less bad, but still.

2) Are you a police officer? If so you’re probably getting more training than a nonsense snark blog post can provide. Please don’t attack peaceful protesters and try to use harm mitigation strategies on ones damaging property, or putting people in harms’ way if that happens.

3) Are you a protester? I’m usually against the bottled water industry, but I always recommend if you’re marching to have a bottle with you. It can be tap water, but those marches can be dehydrating. Maybe bring something you can eat like some trail mix or a Cliff Bar. Please don’t be violent to another human. If you’re going to smash windows or graffiti stuff, know the consequences of that ahead of time.

4) Are you worried about being stuck in traffic? Since May Day is the only day in Seattle where the traffic gets annoying, this is a reasonable fear. If you’re in your car, take alternate routes, I guess. Or wait for the marchers to go somewhere else. They’re marching, so they’ll pass. Give yourself some extra time and be patient with other people caught up in traffic.

If you’re taking public transit, just be patient. Give up your seat if you can since it might take a little longer. You know, bus stuff we already do, mostly.

5) Are you going to be outside Downtown, including suburbia, or like, anywhere North of the Montlake Cut? I guess just watch it on the news. If you do, maybe try to remember that if you’re seeing the same window smashed for the 5th time, it doesn’t make it 5 times as bad. Or watch something else? Maybe. There’s got to be some playoff basketball or a Mariners game. You probably have Netflix, so you can watch something on that. Maybe play a board game with your family.

1 Samuel 20:30
“You stupid son of a whore!”

Discuss.

Onion: America is more religious than other countries due to its proximity to the Gates Of Hell.

Minute Physics: Can we survive curiosity?

Olbermann: Bill-O-the-Clown’s downfall.

Greenman: What happens in the Arctic doesn’t stay in the Arctic.

Jimmy Fallon: Barack Obama is back from his vacation.

Trevor Noah: Confederate Memorial Day makes waves in the South.

Climate Lab: Going green shouldn’t be this hard.

Turmoil in Трамп-Town:

• Stephen: Sometimes Трамп looks at what he is signing
• Ivanka gets booed.
• Seth Meyers: Трамп confronts Canada and North Korea.
• David Pakman: Psychiatrists say Трамп has “dangerous mental illness”
• Olbermann: What would Трамп’s immigrant ancestors say?
• Jimmy Fallon: Pros and cons of Трамп’s first 100 days
• Roy Zimmerman: “T-Rump (The Arse of the Deal)”

• Stephen: How much of Трамп’s 100 day action plan has he completed?
• Mark Fiore: Best first 100 days EVER!
• Sam Seder: Трамп surprised that being President is a lot of work
• Farron Cousins: The only thing Трамп’s done in 100 days is promote his “brand”
• Young Turks: Трамп’s new “VOICE” hotline bombarded with alien calls
• Stephen: Трамп is turning the Oval Office into a tree house
• Seth Meyers: Melania Трамп’s Facebook wall birthday wishes
• Chris Hayes: The trouble with Трамп’s flag
• Tonight Show: Jiminy Glick interviews Donald Трамп on his First 100 Days
• ТрампCare2.0
• Conan: Трамп official explains the border wall “metaphor”
• Young Turks: 100 days of fail.
• Late Night: The Steve Bannon diaries.
• Olbermann: It sure looks like a Russian cover-up
• Stephen: Sometimes Трамп looks at what he is signing
• Maddow: Subject of Michael Flynn seems to panic President Donald Трамп
• Lawrence O’Donnell: 100 days in, Donald Трамп misses his old life.
• Bill Maher: 100 Days of Трамп
• PsychoSuperMom: (Trump’s First) 100 Days
• Seth Meyers: A closer look at Трамп’s executive orders and tax cuts
• Late Show: 99 days in 99 seconds.
• Young Turks: Трамп shocked being President harder than sitting on ass
• Stephen: Mt. Rushmore responds to Трамп monument bill
• Conan: ObSessions.
• Sam Seder: Трамп printed out an Electoral College map from 2016 election & gave it to Reuters reporters
• David Hawkings’ Whiteboard: Трамп’s next budget battle begins
• James Corden: President Трамп can’t leave the block party
• Seth Meyers: Трамп’s 44% approval ratings.
• Olbermann: Trump’s first 100 days. And what has he done?

• Stephen: Let’s stop ‘Zombie Трампcare’ before it spreads
• Trevor Noah: “President Трамп” crashes The Daily Show
• Michael Brooks: Трамп angrily tweets about sanctuary cities, makes it clear he doesn’t know what he’s talking about
• Young Turks: Трамп thinks he can just break up courts he doesn’t like (or know anything about)
• Seth Meyers: Трамп’s first 100 days and a possible government shutdown
• Farron Cousins: Sean Spicer blames Obama for Michael Flynn debacle.
• Stephen: Трамп is fascinated by tech that allows astronauts to drink own pee.
• Daily Show: 100 days of Sean Spicer.

VOX: FAUX News’ problem is a lot bigger than Bill O’Reilly:

Pot activists arrested after smoking pot on the Capitol Lawn.

Kimmel: The week in unnecessary censorship.

Michael Brooks: FAUX News’ Jesse Watters makes blowjob joke about Ivanka, immediately goes on unplanned ‘vacation’

Minute Physics: How do we know the universe is expanding?

Mental Floss: 31 explosive facts about volcanoes.

Nutcase Alex Jones:

• Stephen: Tuck Buckford goes elbow-deep in a tub of Chobani
• Michael Brooks: Alex Jones claims he slept with 150+ women by age 16
• Stephen: Alex Jones calls out Stephen during trial
• Young Turks: Alex Jones sued by Chobani Yogurt

Bill Maher: Change anxiety.

Trevor: So much news…Obama, Coulter & a Senate briefing.

Young Turks: Arkansas is literally on a killing spree.

North Korea’s nuclear threat explained.

Scientists march on Washington.

VOX: How “sanctuary cities” actually work.

Last week’s Friday Night Multimedia Extravaganza can be found here.

Pete Holmes is pretty good as City Attorney, but it seems like there is space to his left if a challenger wants to come along. I mean a lefty candidate pushing harder on the consent decree might be an interesting race.

I don’t know much about Scott Lindsay (Seattle Times link), but all I really get from that article is that he’s been pushing the homeless sweeps that are gross gross gross. He also has supported safe consumption sites, so he probably wouldn’t be going back to the bad old war on drug days.

One of the original taglines for HA was “an (almost) daily blog on Washington state politics and the press,” and my original intention was to focus mostly on media criticism. I was a child of Watergate who grew up idolizing journalists as defenders of democracy, but my accidental adventure as a subject of media coverage gave me a personal tour into how the sausage was made that left me, well, more than a bit disillusioned.

And thirteen years later, disillusioned I remain:

Republicans and Democrats in Olympia worked hard to produce thoughtful education plans, but both fall short. Trying to spend as little as possible is usually the right thing for them to do. But in this case, it’s likely to prolong the legal fight that’s kept the state in limbo and shortchanged students for decades.

Oh Jesus. First, Republicans and Democrats in Olympia most definitely did not work hard to produce thoughtful education plans. The Republicans were obstructionist as usual, gleefully seeking to use the McCleary crisis to stick it to Seattle homeowners while strategically defunding the rest of state government. There is absolutely nothing thoughtful about their levy-swap smoke and mirrors—it was bullshit when Rob McKenna ran on it, and it is bullshit today. Their only goal is shrinking state government, period, whatever the cost in human misery, because they are a stupid, deceitful, mean-spirited, and profoundly pathological party. (Notice the lack of the word “thoughtful” in that string of adjectives.)

As for the Democrats, I don’t question their motives, but my God could we possibly elect a bigger bunch of fucking cowards? Vote to raise taxes, goddammit—bigly!—and then run on your record of trying to get something the fuck done! You lose elections when you stand for nothing. Try standing for something besides “values” for a change, and you may be pleasantly surprised at the polls.

Second, “trying to spend as little as possible is usually the right thing for them to do”…? Really? Try supporting your goddamn thesis, Brier, instead of laying this steaming turd out there like it’s some undisputed gem of fiscal wisdom! It’s not. It’s a steaming turd. In reality, the big problem in Washington State has long been that we are not spending enough money—on education, on mental health, on our foster care system, on transportation, and on many other crucial public goods and services. And we’re not spending enough money because we’re not raising enough money. Which brings us to the third sentence of this trite piece of editorial fluff:

Um, you know who’s really “shortchanged students for decades,” Brier? Your fucking garbage pit of an editorial board, that’s who!

Yeah, sure, I agree with the main thesis of your column, but you and your fellow editorialists need to take a little personal responsibility. Your publisher and your ed board have aggressively opposed meaningful tax reform for decades, despite being repeatedly confronted with actual math that proved our current funding crisis was inevitable. INEVITABLE, goddammit! Totally unavoidable! We have a structural revenue deficit. It’s baked in to our absurdly antiquated (and cruelly regressive) tax structure. This is what comes from an over-reliance on a sales tax that grows revenue slower than the natural rate of growth of the cost of providing public services at a constant level. There’s no getting around it.

So instead, of vague platitudes and half-hearted half-references to the need for “new taxes,” it’s time for you and your paper to get out in front of this issue and demand that legislators pass an income tax. Because you fucking well know that taxing income is the only option that raises the “ample” funding you claim you want. And while we don’t need you to apologize for the selfishly destructive role your paper has played in creating this crisis, you damn well better acknowledge it if you and your ed board ever want to be taken seriously on budget issues again. (Assuming you ever were.)

Wait. No, actually. Fucking apologize. Because honestly, your paper has been so fucking dishonest on this issue that none of you deserve even an emphysematous whisper of a voice in this debate until you issue an institutional mea culpa for being so goddamn awful for so goddamn long.

And oh, if you think this rant was worded a bit too strong, prove me the fuck wrong.

I’m glad the hunger strike for the women at the Tacoma detention facility is over (for now). Their demands are eminently reasonable and it’s a damn shame they ever had to go on a hunger strike in the first place.

The Seattle Chapter of Drinking Liberally meets tonight for our weekly dose of political chat and beer. Please join us.

We meet every Tuesday at the Roanoke Park Place Tavern, 2409 10th Ave E, Seattle. You’ll find us in the small room at the back of the tavern beginning about 8pm.

Can’t make it to Seattle? Check out one of the other 228 chapters of Living Liberally, including nineteen in Washington state, three in Oregon and one in Idaho. Find, or go out and start, a chapter near you.

First Capitol Hill Seattle, and now Seattlish except permanent. It turns out it’s tough to make a go of it covering local news on the Internet and being decent.

I don’t know what to say. Seattle politics will be a lesser place without their wit. It will be a lesser place without their compassion. It will be a lesser place without their dedication to the local. In short it will be a lesser place without their voice.

Good luck in whatever comes next.

Proverbs 31:6-7
Let beer be for those who are perishing,
wine for those who are in anguish!
Let them drink and forget their poverty
and remember their misery no more.

Discuss.