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I’ve always been a bit of a traditionalist; it’s just that I like to create my own traditions. For example, when traveling, rather than the usual touristy shots, I liked to have my photo taken while throwing out trash in front of a famous monument.

Me throwing out trash in front of Notre Dame. Me throwing out trash in front of Anne Frank’s house. Me throwing out trash in front of the Tower of London. You get the idea.

It was particularly fun when traveling alone to try to explain to some non-English speaking native or fellow traveler why I wanted them to take a picture of me posed in front of say, the Acropolis, while throwing out trash. And quite accidentally, it also turned into a surprisingly interesting ethnographic study of trash receptacles from around the world.

Well, according to an email from an old traveling buddy, you can chalk up even this innocent tradition as yet another victim of the Islamo-Fascist war on our freedoms:

Goldy,

I was with the kids in London this past weekend. Planned on sending you a picture of them throwing away trash at some famous location. Sadly all the trash bins have been removed from central London. I guess they made good places to hide bombs.

Damn you Osama bin Laden!

Last time I was in London was back in 1991, during the early days of the first Gulf War (i.e., cheap airfare), at a time of heightened IRA activity  (the enemy of my enemy, and all that). And while couple bombs and bomb threats disrupted rail service for a while, I didn’t notice any shortage of centrally located trash cans.

So it’s interesting that, after finally emerging from decades under the constant threat of IRA violence, the British authorities would take this drastic step in response to the odd Islamist attack. Kinda makes you long for the good old days, huh?

Mission Accomplished!

So stuff some socks down your flight suit and join us on the deck of the U.S.S. Drinking Liberally for an evening of political machismo under the influence. We’ll “bring it on” at the Montlake Ale House, 2307 24th Avenue E. beginning at about 8:00 pm. Some of us will be there even earlier for dinner.

Not in Seattle? There is a good chance you live near one of the 242 other chapters of Drinking Liberally.

I’m guessing by the time ballots are cast this November, most voters will know that Initiative 1098 would raise taxes on households earning over $400,000 a year. But what most voters might not realize is that I-1098 will save the vast majority of us money, especially homeowners and small business owners.

For example, I’ll save $173.00 in the first year alone.

How do I know? Well, I ran my income and my annual property tax through the nifty I-1098 calculator created by the Economic Opportunity Institute… a calculator I’ve embedded below for your convenience below. Try it yourself and see how much money you’ll save.

It looks like I’m not the only one who fears that new anti-bullying policies might be abused by schools to squelch the free expression of their students, but I’m not sure I like the new company I’m keeping:

Focus on the Family has a message for gay rights activists: stay off the playground.

Candi Cushman, an education analyst for the James Dobson-founded group, told The Denver Post this weekend that gay rights advocates have inserted their agenda into anti-bullying efforts, at the expense of Christian values.

“We feel more and more that activists are being deceptive in using anti-bullying rhetoric to introduce their viewpoints, while the viewpoint of Christian students and parents are increasingly belittled,” Cushman told the Post.

Yeah, you know, especially if your viewpoint is that faggots deserve to have the shit beaten out ’em.

Believe it or not, I was never much of a target for bullies. Oddly, I was one of the biggest kids in the class during my first couple years of elementary school, so nobody messed with me, and that reputation lingered much longer than my actual size advantage. And by Junior High I’d already developed the self-effacing yet acerbic wit that would shield me from physical violence for the rest of my school career. (There’s nothing to gain socially by punching out the guy who makes all the other kids laugh.)

Indeed, despite the fact that I played street hockey from age 7 to 27, and in a city whose notion of the sport was formed during the height of the Broad Street Bullies era, I don’t think anybody but my older sister ever landed a punch on me.

So I don’t come at this issue from the perspective of a victim.

But any former kid can tell you that the bulk of boy-on-boy verbal bullying consisted of questioning the victim’s masculinity, if not outright accusing him of being “a fag.” When I was a kid there was no more devastating playground taunt, which is surely one of the reasons why so many gay men of my and previous generations found it so difficult coming out.

That, looking back, some of the bullies were probably gay themselves, while most of the victims weren’t, only underlines the point that the playground was a brutal arena for both proving one’s manhood and rigidly reinforcing social prejudices. Playground bullying is all about asserting social dominance, and like in prison yards and dog parks, that involves making the victim your bitch.

So of course Focus on the Family wants gay activists to stay off the playground. Theirs is a movement grounded in bullying, and schoolyard bullies have always tried to kick the suspiciously faggy kids off the playground. That’s what bullies do.

And that’s a form of free expression I’m not sure school officials need to protect.

Dear SDOT,

Thank you, I guess, for doing whatever it is you’re doing at the corner of Rainier Ave. S. and MLK Jr. Way, but… um… how long does it take to pave 50 feet of roadway? It’s been nearly a month since you shut down the southbound right lane approaching the intersection, creating mile-long backups for much of the day, and with the summer doldrums ending, traffic is only gonna get worse.

Any chance of speeding things up a little bit? Local drivers, bus riders and businesses are just wondering.

Love,

South Seattle

All I’m sayin’ is that you won’t ever see a TPM or HA or even a Seattle PI delivery van involved in any high speed chases.

In writing about the muted local response to the fatwa against Seattle cartoonist Molly Norris, Crosscut writer Pete Jackson asks “Who will speak up for Seattle cartoonist under fatwa threat?”

Um… I did, Pete. What, don’t you read HA? I even posted my own Mohammed cartoon in a show of support:

And just to prove I’m an equal opportunity blasphemer, I also drew a cartoon of Jesus. And myself. And if Jackson really wants to speak up for Norris, he can post his own cartoon too. (As you can see, cartooning doesn’t really require any, you know, talent.)

Instead Jackson embarks on a deep exploration of our “muzzled political climate” by quoting fellow Crosscutter Knute Berger:

The low-grade indifference to Norris could be a pained expression of Northwest culture, the dark side of Seattle Nice (and just look at how the debate over the Ground Zero Mosque dissolved into ad hominems).

“ ’If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all,’ has long been the city’s unofficial motto,” writes Knute Berger in his book Pugetopolis. “It is not a plea for civil discussion, but rather a recipe for no discussion at all.”

In other words, it’s a recipe for the Seattle Times. And sometimes, it seems, Crosscut. Meanwhile, HA’s unofficial motto is: “If you don’t have anything nice to say, welcome to our comment threads!” And while that can sometimes make for awfully nasty discourse, at least folks here are willing to stand up for what they believe, and stand by their convictions.

Back in my 710-KIRO radio days (widely remembered as the glory days of Seattle news/talk), one of my favorite schticks was to have Gen. JC Christian (a.k.a. Jesus’ General) on the show, and then wait for the inevitable barrage of bewildered and often offended callers. The General never broke character, and I always played it straight, but while most of the audience seemed to get the joke, it always amused me how many didn’t.

I was reminded of that this morning while listening to the recording above of a telephone conversation between the General and Prince Shannon of the Right Wing Extreme Militia. Very funny. And kinda terrifying.

Today’s news from The Onion:

“All Muslims are at war with America, and I will resist any attempt to challenge that assertion with potentially illuminating facts,” said Gentries, who threatened to leave the room if presented with the number of Muslims who live peacefully in the United States, serve in the country’s armed forces, or were victims themselves of the 9/11 attacks. “Period.”

Last week’s contest was won by wes.in.wa. It was the Islamic Center in Temecula, CA, whose leaders have run into some opposition with their desire simply to move the location of their center.

Here’s this week’s, good luck!

Exodus 32:24-29
Moses saw that the people were running wild and that Aaron had let them get out of control and so become a laughingstock to their enemies. So he stood at the entrance to the camp and said, “Whoever is for the LORD, come to me.” And all the Levites rallied to him.

Then he said to them, “This is what the LORD, the God of Israel, says: ‘Each man strap a sword to his side. Go back and forth through the camp from one end to the other, each killing his brother and friend and neighbor.’ ” The Levites did as Moses commanded, and that day about three thousand of the people died. Then Moses said, “You have been set apart to the LORD today, for you were against your own sons and brothers, and he has blessed you this day.”

Discuss.

If the Transportation Safety Administration is willing to go so far as to irradiate small children, then clearly, anything that can be done must be done, no matter how expensive, inconvenient or even uncomfortable, to eliminate even the remotest possibility of a terrorist threat. It is in this spirit that I draw upon my own inner terrorist to highlight flaws in our current air travel security system, so that TSA can endeavor to make air travel as absolutely risk-free as possible.

TSA Tip #2: Eliminate Duty Free

While regulations prohibit carrying on duty free spirits in excess of 70% alcohol, there is no such limit on perfumes and colognes, some of which exceed 90% alcohol, and are thus highly flammable. Strategically ignited in one or more locations on an airplane, alcohol fueled fires could cause significant damage and/or injury before being extinguished by the flight crew; indeed, igniting one or more flight attendants might be particularly effective. Jagged, broken bottles from duty free liquor purchases might also make effective weapons in fighting off flight crew and passengers as the fires burn.

Such an attack might not necessarily bring down an airplane, but if the goal is to cause terror, bringing down an airplane might not be necessary.

PREVIOUS TSA TIPS:
Eliminate Web Check-in

(And there are over fifty more links to media from the past week in politics posted at Hominid Views.)

If anybody holds the patent on being a greedy, self-aggrandizing asshole, they should sue Paul Allen.

Talk amongst yourselves.