Goldy

Ezekiel 23:19-20
Yet she became more and more promiscuous as she recalled the days of her youth, when she was a prostitute in Egypt. There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.

Discuss.

From the Minneapolis Star-Tribune:

Dear Pat Robertson,

I know that you know that all press is good press, so I appreciate the shout-out. And you make God look like a big mean bully who kicks people when they are down, so I’m all over that action. But when you say that Haiti has made a pact with me, it is totally humiliating. I may be evil incarnate, but I’m no welcher. The way you put it, making a deal with me leaves folks desperate and impoverished. Sure, in the afterlife, but when I strike bargains with people, they first get something here on earth — glamour, beauty, talent, wealth, fame, glory, a golden fiddle. Those Haitians have nothing, and I mean nothing. And that was before the earthquake. Haven’t you seen “Crossroads”? Or “Damn Yankees”? If I had a thing going with Haiti, there’d be lots of banks, skyscrapers, SUVs, exclusive night clubs, Botox — that kind of thing. An 80 percent poverty rate is so not my style. Nothing against it — I’m just saying: Not how I roll. You’re doing great work, Pat, and I don’t want to clip your wings — just, come on, you’re making me look bad. And not the good kind of bad. Keep blaming God. That’s working. But leave me out of it, please. Or we may need to renegotiate your own contract.

Best, Satan

It’s always good to set the record straight.

The headline says, “President Obama needs to focus on jobs,” but the 624 words of this latest Seattle Times editorial can be summed up in this single paragraph:

The time, energy and political capital Obama invested in creation of a national health plan would have been better spent on promoting job creation and helping U.S. employers compete internationally.

What’s that, the fourth time in as many weeks the Times has advocated scuttling health care reform, each time using jobs as the main rationale?

And how exactly would Obama create more jobs? Here’s an idea: raise taxes on the rich and spend the money on a massive investment in public infrastructure, like building rail and green energy production, or maybe something less controversial like making a dent in the trillion dollars worth of deferred maintenance and investment in our aging drinking water and sewage treatment infrastructure?

Nah… that would require tax increases, and we all know how the Times feels about that.

So come on, Team Blethen… let’s hear some suggestions of your own on how a president might create jobs.

You know that huge teabagger rally in Olympia yesterday… the one which spooked the GOP caucus into introducing a bunch of crazy-ass bills based on bizarre, tentherist bullshit? Well apparently, the only thing that can stop loyal patriotic Americans from defending the Tenth Amendment against the threat of Obamunist oppression is a little rain.

Frightened Republican legislators expected thousands to rally on the steps of the state Capitol yesterday, as evidenced by the dozen porta-potties set up to accommodate the nonverbal excrement they spew, but according to local observers the much publicized rally attracted little more than a hundred angry, deluded righties… maybe two hundred, tops.

That’s some populist revolt the righties have going for them. And yet, they managed to dominate the Republican agenda for the current legislative session. Go figure.

I’m wondering if now might not be the perfect time for the state Legislature to attempt to repeal Washington’s Defense Of Marriage Act, since political buggery appears to be all the rage in Olympia these days:

A bill co-sponsored by Senate transportation chair Mary Margaret Haugen (D-10) and North Seattle Sen. Ken Jacobsen (D-46) would severely restrict Seattle’s say in major state construction projects like reconstruction of the SR-520 bridge and the deep-bore tunnel along the waterfront.

Essentially, the bill would exempt the state department of transportation from the requirement to get local government permits to build state highway projects—a clear swipe at Seattle, which has two major state highway projects—the waterfront tunnel and replacement of the 520 bridge over Lake Washington—in the pipeline.

Specifically, the state transportation department would no longer be “required to obtain local government master use permits, conditional use permits, special use permits, or other similar local zoning permits for staging areas related to the construction of state highways.”

Additionally, under the bill, any street use permits obtained by the state for major state road projects (i.e., the tunnel) would be “presumed approved as submitted” and could only be appealed in superior court, not to a local hearing examiner “or through any other local appeal process.”

So, let me get this straight. Under this proposed legislation, and last year’s measure funding the deep bore tunnel, the state could build whatever it wants, wherever it wants, whenever it wants, without any input or say from local governments, and then (here’s the punchline…) stick local taxpayers with any cost overruns.

Or, I’ve got a better idea. Why don’t we just give Rep. Doug Eriksen the billions of dollars the state has reserved for replacing the 520 bridge and the Viaduct, so that he can spread the money around throughout the rest of Washington like he says he wants to do, while at the same time we eliminate the state gas and MVET taxes altogether, and hand off such authority to cities and counties to levy these taxes locally, if they so choose, to pay for the local transit and transportation projects they want?

That way, the rest of the state won’t have to worry about Seattle stealing its money, while we in the Seattle area can address our own infrastructure needs without worrying about the rest of the state repeatedly fucking us up the ass.

I’m just sayin’.

When state Sen. Ken Jacobsen introduced legislation to allow dogs into bars, the old and new media alike tripped over themselves in a mad rush to heap ridicule on this lone, eccentric senator. But when a full two-thirds of the House Republican caucus sign on to a batch of clearly unconstitutional bills spouting tentherist teabagger bullshit, what do we hear from our depleted political press corps…?

[audio:http://horsesass.org/wp-content/uploads/crickets.mp3]

And there are folks who accuse me of not being a serious political commentator.

Will of the people, blah, blah, blah, blah…

DEMOCRATIC leaders in Olympia should not be so eager to brush aside Initiative 960, which sets the two-thirds threshold for the Legislature to raise taxes. The people have voted for a two-thirds rule three times — in 1993, 1998 and in 2007. Clearly they want it that way.

Without I-960, the Legislature can raise taxes with a simple majority of both houses and signature of the governor. I-960 raises the bar by requiring a two-thirds vote of both houses or a vote of the people. Raising taxes is not impossible — hardly that — but it is more difficult.

The state constitution protects successful initiatives for two years. During that time they can be modified with a two-thirds vote of both houses. Last month, the two years were up for I-960, which can now be brushed aside with simple majorities. But that is not what the people wanted.

Let’s be honest, the Seattle Times editorial board only vigorously defends the will of the people when they agree with it. On issues like light rail and renewable energy requirements, not so much.

Besides, the law is the law, and as the Times argues, if the people don’t like it, they are free to change it. For example, the Constitution says that the Legislature can amend an initiative of the people after two years. If that’s such a big problem then perhaps the Times should endorse a Constitutional amendment that keeps the Legislature’s hands off initiatives, and allows them only to be amended via initiative. After all, just such a restriction on legislative powers has worked out so well for California, hasn’t it?

And you know what else the state Constitution says? That all legislation, even that raising taxes or eliminating tax breaks, requires only a simple majority to pass. The Washington Supreme Court has never approved I-960’s super-majority requirements, rather, all previous challenges to these provisions have been rejected due to lack of standing. And again, unlike in California, Washington citizens cannot amend the Constitution via initiative.

You can’t have it both ways. You can’t say that an initiative should remain inviolable but the Constitution should not.

Or I guess, if you’re the Seattle Times ed board, I suppose you think you can.

So, let me get this right, Pat. God is killing innocent little children today, because their Haitian ancestors made a pact with the devil two hundred years ago? What an asshole.

Anyway, despite the fact that God hates Haitians, you can still help them by contributing to the Clinton Foundation Haitian Relief Fund. Or, text “HAITI” to 20222 and $10 will be donated to relief efforts, and charged to your cell phone bill.

State Rep. Matt Shea (R-Greenacres)

In case you missed last night’s post, House Republicans have introduced a butt-load of paranoid, crazy-ass, teabagger bills, in a paranoid, crazy-ass attempt to appease the paranoid, crazy-ass teabaggers threatening to challenge incumbent Republicans from the paranoid, crazy-ass right. And one of the common denominators — other than a shaky grasp of the law that makes Tim Eyman look like a Constitutional scholar — is state Rep. Matt Shea, who has not only signed on as a sponsor to all the bills, but appears as the prime on most of them as well.

Of course, this is the type of craziness we’ve come to expect of the Republican from Greenacres (no, really… he’s from Greenacres), but it’s more than a little astounding and embarrassing to see two-thirds of Shea’s fellow caucus members join him in such ridiculous political slop. And it’s hard for the GOP leadership to complain about being excluded from critical budget negotiations when their members appear to have made provoking a second Civil War their number one legislative priority.

(3) Any action by the federal government, or its agencies or agents, including the president of the United States, the congress of the United States, and the federal courts, against any person in Washington state for compliance with the provisions of this chapter is considered a hostile and unconstitutional action against Washington state and its citizens, and the state of Washington will by all necessary measures act to preserve its sovereignty.

Yeah, well, good luck with that, Rep. Shea. It’s one thing to abuse your wife, but it’s another thing to try to push around the government of the United States of America. I mean, to do that you’re going to need lots of firepower… you know, lot’s of unregulated arms, ammunition and accessories, manufactured right here in the Sovereign State of Washington. Which I suppose explains why Shea and 19 of his colleagues would introduce HB 2709, the Washington State Firearms Freedom Act of 2010, which amongst other things, would legalize and deregulate both silencers and cop killer bullets.

Sec. 4. (1) A personal firearm, a firearm accessory, or ammunition that is manufactured commercially or privately in Washington and that remains within the borders of Washington is not subject to federal law or federal regulation, including registration, under the authority of congress to regulate interstate commerce.

This in the wake of our recent rash of tragic police shootings.

I suppose I should be amused to see the state Republicans self-destruct this way, but when you really think about how crazy and dangerous their proposed legislation is, it’s more than a little bit scary to imagine what they might do to Washington and its citizens should they ever seize control of state government. You know, through Democratic or other means.

During his years as a columnist at the Seattle P-I, Ted Van Dyk earned a reputation for, um, not responding kindly to editorial feedback, which I suppose explains why the editors at Crosscut don’t even try. For example, take his recent prescription for balancing state and local budgets without raising taxes:

Big capital projects should be put on hold. That would mean, in Seattle, moving forward with both the deep-bore tunnel, to replace the Alaskan Way Viaduct, and the Evergreen Point bridge modernization.

Now that’s the sort of logical, coherent prose that makes Van Dyk a must read for lazy bloggers everywhere.

Yeah sure, if you read further you eventually figure out that he really means that all big capital projects other than 520 and the Big Bore should be put on hold, but from a writerly perspective one could make a strong argument that there’s an entire paragraph missing between the two sentences above.

Which of course distracts from the factual incoherence of Van Dyk’s argument, in that capital and operating budgets actually have nothing to do with each other. For example, Van Dyk surprises no one by arguing that King County Executive Dow Constantine should halt light rail’s Eastside expansion:

Its crushing prospective pricetag ($23 billion and counting) already threatens to displace not only non-rail transportation but other spending for other public purposes in the decade ahead.

But the dedicated taxes to pay for this project were overwhelmingly approved by voters for the express purpose of building rail, not roads. (Remember, the “Roads & Transit” measure failed at the polls one year before the transit-only version passed.) And even if Constantine could halt construction, in clear defiance of the will of the people, it’s not like the revenue could be legally shifted to, say, jails, courts and law enforcement… a criminal justice system that eats up over 70% of the county’s general fund.

So to use an operating budget deficit as an excuse for arguing to halt capital spending on projects you don’t like, is just plain dishonest. Or stupid.

But either way, it makes for juicy blog fodder.

If the Republican caucus has a coherent strategy for narrowing the Democrats’ near super-majority in the state House, you wouldn’t know it from the steaming pile of crazy-ass bills their members have already introduced. Sure, there are always a few extreme or downright bizarre bills dropped each session from both sides of the aisle, but never before has one caucus gone so far off the deep end, and in such overwhelming numbers.

And if Democrats play their cards right, you gotta think that this is gonna hurt the Republican brand next November.

Exactly how crazy are we talking about? While how about HJM 4010, a House Joint Memorial sponsored by Representatives Condotta, Shea, Klippert, Kretz and McCune, that asks Congress to do away with both the Federal Reserve and paper money:

NOW, THEREFORE, Your Memorialists respectfully pray that the Congress of the United States, and particularly, the legislative delegation to Congress of the State of Washington, use all of their efforts, energies, and diligence to protect all the citizens of this nation from potential, unprecedented losses in the value of take-home pay, retirement income, insurance policies, and investments as a result of the Federal Reserve’s ongoing inflation of our unbacked paper money by passing legislation (such as H.R. 2756 to repeal our nation’s legal tender laws, H.R. 4683 “The Free Competition in Currency Act of 2007,” and H.R. 5427 the “Tax-Free Gold Act of 2008”) to help restore gold and silver money in accordance with the Constitution, then phasing out the Federal Reserve System and its inflationary paper money, the Federal Reserve Note (as in H.R. 2755).

That’s right… these Republican legislators want our currency to consist entirely of gold and silver coins. Yeah, that’ll get our economy moving.

Now I know what you’re thinking: there’s only five Republican sponsors on that bill. It just isn’t fair to categorize the entire GOP caucus as off their collective rockers based on this one joint memorial.

So how about HB 2709, the Washington State Firearms Freedom Act of 2010 (Shea, Ross, Kristiansen, Haler, Klippert, Taylor, McCune, Short, Hinkle, Course, Dammeier, Parker, Johnson, Angel, Bailey, Orcutt, Roach, Schmick, Fagan and Condotta), which attempts to exempt any firearm, firearm accessory, or ammunition manufactured and retained in Washington state from federal regulation.

Or HB 2712, the Washington State Sovereignty and Federal Tax Escrow Account Act of 2010 (Shea, Condotta, Kristiansen, Klippert, Haler, Anderson, Taylor, Short, Kretz, Crouse, McCune, Hinkle, Ross, Roach and Schmick), which requires that all federal taxes be remitted to the state, and held in escrow, and includes the rather startling threat that any action by the feds against a WA citizen for complying with the act (you know, like not paying the IRS your taxes) would be considered a “hostile and unconstitutional action against Washington state and its citizens,” against which the state would take “all necessary measures.”

And then there’s HB 2708, the Washington State Energy Freedom Act of 2010 (Shea, Condotta, Kristiansen, Haler, Klippert, Herrera, Taylor, Short, Kretz, McCune, Crouse, Rodne, Hinkle, Parker, Dammeier, Ross, Angel, Bailey, Roach, Orcutt, Schmick, Fagan and Smith), which exempts seeks to exempt Washington state from any federal fuel economy or greenhouse gas emission standards. That’s 23 of the caucus’s 36 members!

And all three of these clearly stupid and unconstitutional bills include the following clearly stupid and unconstitutional provision:

Any federal law, rule, order, or other act by the federal government violating the provisions of this chapter is invalid in this state, is not recognized by and is specifically rejected by this state, and is considered as null and void and of no effect in this state.

That’s right, nearly two-thirds of the Republican House caucus have signed their names onto crazy-ass bills that attempt to assert that state law trumps federal law whenever state legislators say it does. Which raises the question: what the fuck have they been putting into their tea?

Well apparently, “tea” is the operative word here. The crazy-ass teabaggers are rallying in Olympia on Thursday, and this apparently has Republicans running scared… so scared that they’re willing to make themselves look like… well… a bunch of crazy-ass teabaggers.

Republicans apparently fear that unless they appease the teabaggers with the kinda crazy, paranoid, right-wing, pseudo-constitutional bullshit that makes Ellen Craswell look like Dan Evans Lyndon LaRouche look like John Adams, they’ll face a Teabagger Party primary challenger… so much so that some Republicans reportedly plan to put “Prefers GOP/Tea Party” next to their names on the ballot this year.

How else to explain why, with the Legislature facing a $2.6 billion shortfall one year after passing a devastating all-cuts budget, the House Republican caucus has made redefining the Commerce Clause of the U.S. Constitution they’re number one priority this session?

One would have thought that with the crappy economy and the ongoing budget woes and the Democrats already having stretched their majorities to likely unsustainable numbers, the GOP might at least pretend to run to the middle in the hope of winning back a few swing districts. Instead, it looks like what’s left of their party is dissolving like a sugar cube in cup of hot tea.

Man, is this gonna be fun to watch.

One of the issues debated at last night’s 37th LD Dems meeting was a resolution supporting Mayor Mike McGinn’s decision to suspend the city’s ban on all-day parking lots near Link Light Rail stations. Only it wasn’t really debated, per se… more like passed unanimously without much discussion, let alone dissent

I was kinda surprised, as one of the purposes of the ban is to prevent the neighborhoods surrounding the stations from becoming destinations for park and riders. The purpose of light rail, after all, is more to get people out of their cars than it is to save folks a few bucks on downtown parking, and paving the surrounding properties over with parking lots does little to serve the local community.

But while I agree with the intentions of the ban, there’s something to be said for being flexible, and with many development projects on hold due to the bad economy, and local businesses struggling to make ends meet, a temporary lift of the ban only makes sense. As Martin Duke aptly explains at Seattle Transit Blog:

The reason to oppose park and rides is that they cost a lot of public money ($40k a space in some cases) for not a lot of riders, and because they take up valuable space that could be used for more vibrant development.  In some cases, people who park might otherwise have walked, taken the bus, or biked to the station.

Here we have private lots that aren’t costing a dime of tax money, and are in fact generating parking tax revenue; an abundance of empty gravel pits around all Rainier Valley stations, so that there’s no shortage of TOD locations; and of course, a small parking fee to limit users to those who have really bad bus transfers, live too far to walk, and are strongly disinclined to bike.  It’s a perfect situation.

In fact, anything that gets more people using light rail short term will be good for light rail long term. Just as long as we don’t turn the Rainier Valley into a permanent desert of park and ride lots.

I soldiered my way through the 37th LD Dems monthly meeting last night, a grueling three-plus hour affair that helps to explain why it’s so difficult to bring young blood into these sort of organizations. It’s not that the topics of discussion weren’t for the most part interesting or worthy, and it’s not like I didn’t learn anything from the debate, it’s just that the proceedings would have been much more enjoyable had they been conducted in half the time, and under the influence of caffeine and/or beer.

Sitting next to me near the back of the room was a brand spanking new Precinct Committee Officer who, while one of the youngest people in the room, I’m guessing was still past the age beyond which Jerry Rubin warned us never to trust. Well into the third hour of proceedings I asked him if he had ever actually attended an LD meeting before agreeing to become a PCO, and he said no, that he had only just been recruited last month at the LD Christmas party.

“There was drinking,” he said, attempting to explain his predicament, “it was fun.” I imagined him one of the wayward boys in Pinocchio, transforming into a donkey after a raucous day on Pleasure Island. Later that evening, after he and the other new PCOs were officially appointed by acclamation, I congratulated him by leaning in and muttering “sucker.”

Of course I jest, in that I really do appreciate the hard and necessary work the party regulars perform, and I know plenty of PCOs who find their duties rewarding, gratifying and even enjoyable. I mean, what better way to get to know your neighbors than to knock on their doors and actually talk with them?

And when it comes to incessant rambling about politics, I rank with the worst of them: for all my whining about the length of last night’s meeting, I found myself standing in the rain outside the hall past midnight, continuing the discussions with a couple of my fellow LD members.

But then, I’m self-aware enough to know that when it comes to my fascination with politics, I’m weird, and that if we want to connect with voters, we really don’t want a party populated solely by weirdos like me. Imagine your average, civic-minded twenty-or-thirty-something showing up at an LD meeting, only to stumble out bleary eyed three and half hours later. Now imagine your average, civic-minded twenty-or-thirty-something coming back a second time. Hard to imagine, huh?

And yet, that’s exactly what we need to do if we want to maintain and expand the vitality and diversity of our party.

House minority floor leader Doug Ericksen (R-42, Ferndale) says that if Seattle can’t make up its mind on how to replace the Alaskan Way Viaduct, Eastern Washington would be happy to take our money:

“As someone who actually understands that the Eastside means the east side of the state, not the east side of the lake, I get a little bit irritated with the amount of money we spend waiting for Seattle to make a decision on transportation projects,” Ericksen said. “We’d be happy to take that $3 billion and spread it to the rest of Washington.”

Notice how he doesn’t say “We’d be happy to take that $3 billion and use it to balance the state budget.” No, he’d just be happy to take money from an economically vital Seattle project and spread it around the red counties, whether it’s needed there or not.

Huh. I guess that’s what Republicans mean when they describe themselves as fiscal conservatives.