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Seattle Times Credulously Prints Quote from Fake Business Group

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A decade ago, in reluctantly rejecting a guest column I had submitted (a modest proposal on how to increase per-student spending in Washington’s public schools), an editor at one of our region’s dailies lamented that, alas, too many newspaper readers lack “the satire gene.” Well, apparently some newspaper reporters lack this gene as well:

The Seattle Times

Business leaders aren’t arguing with the $15-an-hour goal. In fact, the OneSeattle website calls the current state minimum wage of $9.32 “undeniably less than it costs to support yourself.”

Yeah, that’s right: Seattle Times reporter Lynn Thompson quotes the wonderfully satirical fake OneSeattle website from a page that is so outrageous (it counts time texting on the job toward total compensation) that it’s hard to believe an informed reader wouldn’t get the joke. But she didn’t. Which has the 1Seattle.org folks crowing.

Amazing.

In other questionable reporting news, the Seattle Times taps a Von Trapp’s bartender as the voice of tipped employees opposing a $15 minimum wage, just days after printing an anti-$15 guest column from Von Trapp’s owner. Hmm.

UPDATE: Ha! I’ve once again earned my reputation as the Seattle Times’ volunteer ombudsman:

Information in this article, originally published April 19, 2014, was corrected April 21, 2014. A previous version of this story incorrectly attributed two quotes to business group OneSeattle’s website.

Open Thread 4/21

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– Get your ballot in the mail by tomorrow, King County.

– Link and the Rising Seas

– Apparently the Bundy Ranch standoff is like Rosa Parks and Gandhi rolled up in one.

– Admitting privileges for doctors who perform abortions is such a problem. Part 2,874,098,236,930,671 in an infinity part series.

– The fact that I liked the explodey fun time action sequences means that a movie in which Captain America is pretty much straight up Chelsea Manning and the security state is literally nazis means that it’s secretly glibertarian and in-group approved… but… since we’re on the subject, HOW DARE HE SPEAK AGAINST THE GLORIOUS SECURITY STATE! HAIL HYDRA!

Here’s Your Chance to Help Me Redesign HA!

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Okay, now that I’m back writing at HA (at least for the moment), I’m absolutely sick of staring at it’s five-year-old design. It’s cramped and busy and the sidebars are filled with a bunch of outdated bullshit. (Yes, I know.) And it fails to take advantage of all the latest technology that allows websites to automatically resize to fit various screen sizes from desktop to tablet to phone.

So I’m doing a redesign.

Nothing fancy. Very sparse. Lots of white space. Larger text. Wider content column. Won’t win any design awards. But my goal is to make the site a lot more readable than it is today, regardless of the device you are reading it from.

And as long as I’m under the hood, there’s room for functionality improvement too, so I’m interested in hearing from the HA community what changes you might like to see implemented. For example, threaded comments? I’ve always been enamored of threaded comments, although the current chronological display has its merits too. Or how about requiring comment registration? There are available plug-ins that can enable registration via your Twitter or Facebook account, so it wouldn’t be much of a hassle.

And of course, there’s the design and layout itself. Like I said, I’m not planning anything fancy. I’m not a designer. But if you are, and you’ve got some (free) ideas, or maybe you even want to take a crack at a new (and free) logo, let me know.

Or not. One way or another I’m tossing out this tired old template.

Friday Night Multimedia Extravaganza!

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Ann Telnaes: Money corrupts the democratic process.

Maddow: Right Wing Extremists Have Terrorized America More Than Jihadists Since Sept. 11th:

David Pakman: Gov. Rick Perry now the focus of a criminal investigation.

GOP Law and Disorder:

Sharpton: Scott Brown kicks off his NH Senate run…with deception.

Chris Hayes: GOP whackos assemble in NH for “Freedom Summit”.

Deadbeat Rancher Induces Orgasms Among The Right Wing Fringe:

Richard Fowler: Rep Blackburn claims GOP “Led Fight For Women’s Equality”.

Mental Floss: 28 birthday traditions from around the world.

Sam Seder: Louie Gohmert vs. Eric Holder.

Alex Wagner: New Republican female initiative–Marry rich men.

Thom: The Good, The Bad, and The Very, Very Ugly.

Painting Away the Guilt:

Ann Telnaes: Congress is out on recess again.

Richard Fowler: Republicans having difficulty with the reality that ObamaCare works.

Aasif Mandvi talks about that one time when a republican said the N-word on TV.

Liberal Viewer: Only rich think the IRS is the most intrusive, punitive part of the government?.

Ann Telnaes: The conservative approach to bridging the pay gap.

A Conspiracy With Some Sole:

White House: West Wing Week.

David Pakman: Glenn Beck says his theories are coming true…won’t say which ones.

Pap: GOP suffers from Bush amnesia.

Last week’s Friday Night Multimedia Extravaganza can be found here.

Introducing Hoopty: Seattle’s Newest Ride-Share Option!

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Hoopty

If you can’t beat ’em, join ’em, that’s what I always say, which is why I’ve decided to supplement my unemployment by driving part-time for Hoopty™, Seattle’s newest ride-share company!

Hoopty fully embraces the efficiency of the unregulated free market to deliver the future of ride-share today, conveniently offering both prearranged and hailed pickups through your smartphone—just call, text, or email me from your smartphone, and I’ll come pick you up! All of our vehicles have passed the state emissions test, and are guaranteed to have been driven fewer than 100,000 miles (at least for the next 600 miles or so). You can recognize Hoopty by the cracked windshield, the menacing dog, and our signature styrofoam “TAXI” sign crudely taped to the roof of the car.

Take that, pink mustache!

With Hoopty, you’ll enjoy our casual user experience, sitting right up front with the driver. Unless the dog lets you into the back—Feisty hasn’t bitten anybody in years, and even then, not much more than a nip, so you’ll probably be okay—just don’t make any sudden moves or loud noises.

At the end of your ride, your Hoopty driver will be happy to take your credit card, but unlike Lyft, Sidecar, and Uber, we also take cash and barter. (For example, we could really use a new windshield. And maybe some brakes.) And of course, all Hoopty drivers are carefully screened and fully insured. Don’t worry how much insurance. Just trust us!

And finally, at Hoopty, we guarantee that you get what you pay for! Hoopty doesn’t waste money on bells and whistles like app development or car washing or routine vehicle maintenance, allowing us to offer you the most affordable ride-share in Seattle. Tired of paying Uber’s infamous surge pricing? We promise to charge you something less than that, or your money back!

Ready to try Hoopty? Feisty and I will be cruising downtown Seattle this afternoon picking up hailing passengers; just look for the menacing dog and the styrofoam sign, and scream out the special offer code: “Goldy, I need a ride!” As for Hoopty’s legality, well, it’s not like Lyft, Sidecar, and uberX have a monopoly on breaking Seattle’s taxi and for-hire laws. So while we don’t technically have a for-hire license or anything, we don’t expect the Seattle police to bother to stop us, let alone issue a citation. And if they do, we’ll just sue the fuck out of the city for selective enforcement.

Hoopty™: Because if Wall Street backed ride-share companies can break the law, anybody can!

It Is the City Council, Not the Mayor’s Unelected “Advisory” Committee, That Will Write Seattle’s $15 Minimum Wage Ordinance

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I’m not sure what all the hoo-hah is over the current “impasse” on a $15 minimum wage. Mayor Ed Murray’s Income Inequality Advisory Committee is exactly that: an advisory committee. As a body, it is empowered to do nothing more than advise. If it fails to come to a consensus, so what? Either way, it is the city council that will ultimately write and pass Seattle’s $15 minimum wage ordinance, whatever the advice of the mayor or his committee.

Advisory

Now if the advisory committee does come to some sort of unanimous consensus, that would be news, considering that three of its members—Bruce Harrell, Nick Licata, and Kshama Sawant—comprise one-third of the city council. If you’ve got Sawant and the restaurant industry backing the same proposal, you’ve likely got a deal the council can rubber stamp. Hooray! But if there’s no consensus out of the committee, the council will still pass something.

Eight of nine city council members—everybody but Tim Burgess—are already on the record supporting some sort of a $15 minimum wage. So I fail to see the leverage that some advisory committee members seem to think they have in threatening to block some sort of a compromise proposal. An advisory committee proposal would be nice—especially a unanimous one—but it is not integral to the process. And while a consensus might make a ballot battle less likely, I’m not sure that one is avoidable, for no stakeholder on either side of the issue is bound by decision of the committee.

So yeah, if the advisory committee fails to produce a consensus proposal, the mayor will propose something regardless, and the council will do what the council is going to do. Because that’s the council’s job, not the job of a powerless, unelected committee.

Time to Start Locking Up Lyft, Uber, and Sidecar Drivers

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Lyft Car on the road

Source: Lyft

Now that Uber, Lyft, and Sidecar have submitted enough signatures to force a referendum on Seattle’s recently revised taxi, limousine, and for-hire ordinance, it is time to start throwing their drivers in jail.

It is a criminal violation in the city of Seattle to pick up paying passengers without a valid for-hire license, punishable by up to 90 days in jail and a $1,000 fine. No doubt the recently passed ordinance didn’t give the “Transportation Network Companies” (TNCs) everything they wanted, but it did legitimize their businesses, giving them a path toward legal operations. But by submitting sufficient signatures to force a referendum, the TNCs have effectively suspended the new ordinance, leaving the old law on the books. So, you know, enforce it!

Seriously. This is a political power play that is about more than just caps. The question here is who gets to write Seattle’s laws? The popularly elected city council after a year of public hearings and excruciating deliberations? Or the venture capitalists behind a handful of clever iPhone apps?

The TNCs think they have the upper hand. But in addition to suspending all caps, insurance, inspection, training and other regulations on their vehicles and drivers (along with all taxes and fees!), the TNCs have also suspended their right to operate legally. So if they hate the new law so much, let’s see how they like the old one.

A sting operation would be easy. Book a ride, and when the driver shows up, issue a citation and impound the car. Because it’s the law. It’ll only take a few high profile arrests to convince most drivers to log off the system. And then maybe the TNCs will be moved to negotiate a new ordinance instead of attempting to impose one.

YOU REPRESENT THE SAME DISTRICT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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It’s dark days for trying to do local political metacommentary. The election isn’t in enough swing to really make fun of campaign stuff, and the legislature is out of session. So all I get from the GOP caucuses is press releases like this about how people are holding town halls. So instead of making fun of the Republicans, I’m just going to use this Republican press release to air one of my pet peeves about Washington politics. Emphasis mine.

Reps. J.T. Wilcox, R-Yelm, and Graham Hunt, R-Orting, will hold an hour-long telephone town hall for 2nd District residents Wednesday, April 23, at 6:30 p.m.

We have to come up with a more uniform system of labeling where people represent. Seriously, you look at that, and you think, oh, the person who represents Yelm and the person who represents Orting are going to get together and discuss stuff, cool. But in fact, they both represent Yelm and they both represent Orting. I see this all the time, and I assume this is based on where they live, or possibly where their district office is located?

And it seems like the solution is simple enough: Just name the districts after the geography. Then everyone can be from the same place. Also, when people are talking about districts, there will be a name instead of a number, so I won’t have to look at a damn map to have a conversation.

Seriously, the next redistricting commission should get on that.

New Feature: #StoopidTweetoftheDay

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Back in Stupidland I sarcastically tweeted back “like that’s believable” to the Capitol Hill Chamber of Commerce’s suggestion that it somehow represents the non-profit community better than the Seattle Human Services Coalition (SHSC). Which apparently offended the chamber’s Michael Wells. You can read the whole stupid, stupid exchange here.

For the record, SHSC—a coalition of hundreds of human services providers, agencies, programs, and individuals—fully supports a $15 an hour base minimum wage “that does not include other forms of compensation.” I later asked Michael if his non-profit championing chamber would accept a straight up $15 minimum wage that allowed a health care deduction only for non-profits?

“Nope.”

Fair or not, the chamber’s claim to be championing the interests of non-profits is simply stupid messaging. It fails the sniff test. It makes them sound arrogant and disingenuous. The chamber should really consider taking my constructive criticism to heart.

Also on Twitter, hipster oligarch David Meinert helpfully suggests that folks might take me more seriously “if you could make a point without all the negativity.”   I suppose he’s talking about posts like this. Huh.

The thing is, politics is an adversarial process. It’s a contact sport. So if you can’t take a few bruises, then get out of the game. I didn’t make these rules—I don’t even necessarily like them. But fuck if I’m going to play with one hand tied behind my back for the sake of not offending people who would congratulate themselves for passing a $15 minimum wage that doesn’t pay $15 an hour.

Open Thread 4-17

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– Vigil planned for 17 year-old student struck by car, killed in NE Seattle

– There’s your liberal media for you.

– How Football Culture Can Change Rape Culture

– Link’s ridership has increased enough by February to meet it’s yearly projected growth.

– This is an unjust and morally bankrupt system that can be fought by western citizens and governments demanding accountability, including the application of a broad set of international laws that companies must follow regardless of where they site their work or who they contract it out to. Without this, the race to the bottom around the globe will continue.

– It’s time to get worried about the Collectivists

Ladies and Gentlemen, Our Paper of Record:

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I honestly have no idea what this editorial is trying to say:

THE Legislature already faces the difficult job writing a balanced, education-focused budget when it reconvenes in January. That job got harder two weeks ago with an $80 million bill sent, as if in a time machine, from 2003.

According to a state Supreme Court ruling, the bill is owed to about 22,000 contracted in-home care providers for the state Department of Social and Health Services’ clients with disabilities.

[…] In this case, the state Supreme Court adds to an already hefty bill it imposed in the education-funding McCleary decision, which is coming due. While the court’s job is not to budget, it also does not operate in a vacuum.

Feel free to read all the in-between parts, but it’s not going to help. The Seattle Times editorial board is arguing what…? That the Supreme Court shouldn’t enforce an $80 million judgment against the state? That the Supreme Court shouldn’t enforce McCleary? I presume there’s an opinion in here somewhere.

No, it’s not the court’s job to write the budget. But if the state lacks the financial resources necessary to meet its legal obligations—as determined by the highest court in the state—shouldn’t our editorialists be urging the legislature to write a budget that raises the revenue necessary to obey the law, rather than chastising the court for, um, something?

I dunno, just seems to me like the responsible thing to do.

Hmmmm

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Well, boo for Governor Inslee hiring a coal lobbyist.

Gov. Jay Inslee has hired a coal lobbyist to direct his policy office, an eyebrow-raising selection for a governor who has insisted on sweeping scrutiny of coal export terminals proposed at Cherry Point, north of Bellingham, and along the Columbia River at Longview.

The new appointee is Matt Steuerwalt, who has been through the revolving door in recent years. He was a top energy/climate adviser to then-Gov. Chris Gregoire, then went to work for the Seattle-based Strategies 360 group.

Of course the policy matters more than the person putting it in place. And later in the piece, his spokespeople make the case that this hire won’t change Inslee’s decision on the coal export terminal. I hope that’s true, but let’s call this a bad sign none the less.

Here’s the part of the post where I mention that you can drop Governor Inslee a line if you’re unhappy with this hire, you can email his office.

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