I feel like a lot of the wash you hands messages are geared to children. And I get it: Teach the people who can most easily develop lifetime habits. And maybe they can teach their parents things.

That’s good, but for adults: Wash your fucking hands. Are you near a sink? Wash them now. Are you somewhere that you can’t wash your hands? Make a plan for the next time you can wash your hands, and then go do it. Also, to men and other users of the men’s room specifically, wash your hands after using the urinal. Even if you hadn’t literally just touched your penis, it’s still a good idea.

If you’re like me, yesterday’s vote was pretty rough (and if not, congrats). I will, of course, support the Democratic nominee whole heartedly. And not just because President Trump is a garbage nightmare, but because it is a million things that the President does that will be better under Biden than any Republican. And obviously the House and Senate are also important, so work on that if you can.

As the coronavirus spreads, but I keep taking public transportation, I keep thinking about the grossest things that I have seen. People coughing or sneezing on to their hands and then grabbing the post or the strap. Food strewn about. Mystery liquid or scents.

So I’m glad to see that Metro is as in it as they can be. There are a lot of people who are doing a lot to keep us as healthy as possible right now. Even though I often times can’t see them, I will try to give them the same types of consideration as the memory of things that have grossed me out over the years.

If you work in Washington State, you have sick leave protection. And if you work in Seattle, the laws are stronger. With the new coronavirus going around, it’s pretty important to take sick leave if you need it, but even with the regular getting sick, it’s a good idea to take your sick leave.

Every Presidency a lot happens. And so a lot is on the ballot. Big stuff, little stuff. Obviously, we’re focused on a potential global pandemic today.

But! Recently the NLRB passed a rule to make easier for a franchise to fire workers in retaliation for union organizing. It is now on the individual franchisee rather than the larger franchise. A million of these smaller decisions — boards, court cases you never heard of — are on the ballot.

The stock market has taken a tumble this morning. And so, it’s as good a time as any to remind you that stocks are not the economy. You could be doing well or not. Collectively, one tumble in the market due to a disease isn’t employment or wages. So some spooked investors are spooked. But we should continue to deal with homelessness and wages and job security and empowering unions because those matter more than the rise and fall of the DJIA on any particular day.

Glad that Seattle is providing for more transitional encampments (first point). I can’t imagine that it’s enough, but it’s a step in the right direction. Maybe the rest of us could remember that they’re, like, actual humans living in tents and tiny houses.

The Washington State Presidential Primary ballots will be mailed on Friday. So you should be getting it next week. You have to declare your party and get it returned by March 10.

(Sorry I didn’t write this sooner)

Applications for King County’s Section 8 lottery are going on now. If you are eligible, I would encourage you to apply.

Did you vote in a special election? Did your local bond pass? Should I have covered it before it was over? All good questions.

Big election coming up tomorrow. Could make a huge difference for years to come. Of course, I am talking about the King Conservation District. You can vote online for this one, so you can vote on the toilet. In fact, I will be disappointed in you if you don’t vote from the toilet.

I asked a couple environmentalists and they said Porter. So vote for Porter — while pooping — is the official Carl Ballard recommendation.

It would be nice if the Sound Transit area was allowed to pay for Sound Transit without shenanigans from the state. I know, I know there was an initiative. Still, if you want to contact your legislators and let them know that it’s bullshit, Transportation Choices Coalition has a place for you to write them.

So, today is the impeachment vote

And by now it seems rather rote

If you think they have some gall

Well, give them a call.

Or at least you can write them a note.

The caucus

The caucus

Does whatever the cock does!

Hangs around ’till you’re irate.

The second round is not as great.

Look out!

Iowa caucuses.

Obviously apologies to Spiderman, cocks, and rhyme schemes. And good luck to the candidates.

Happy maybe last day of impeachment. I see people posting on Twitter that if he’s acquitted, President Trump will start believing that he’ll start feeling like he can do anything. But that’s false; Of course he has always operated like he can do anything and will continue as long as he’s in office. Impeachment showed who the Republicans are, and now it’s up to us to defeat them.