Roll Call provides a history of the savage Santorum smear concocted (so to speak) by Dan Savage. Former Pennsylvania Senator and likely 2012 GOP presidential primary candidate Rick Santorum has a rather persistent “Google problem.”
Santorum’s Google problem began in 2003, when gay sex-advice columnist Dan Savage sought to mock Santorum’s comments on homosexuality. Then the third-most-powerful Republican in the Senate, Santorum told the Associated Press that April that gay sex could “undermine the fabric of our society.” The interview touched on a Supreme Court case related to sexual privacy, and Santorum compared homosexual acts to allowing for “man on child, man on dog” relationships.
[…]Savage soon created the website spreadingsantorum.com, tied to a contest in which he asked readers to submit definitions for the term “santorum.”
The winning entry…see santorum.
As a former constituent of Sen. Santorum, my initial reaction upon hearing the neologism was, “Brilliant!” Two reasons why.
First, it just feels…um, maybe I should say, it just sounds right. Dan Savage wouldn’t talk to Roll Call about it, but in 2003 he completely nailed the “sounds right” aspect:
What works so well about santorum is that a smart Savage Love reader linked Senator Santorum’s vaguely clinical-sounding name with something distinctly scatological, an anal-sex-induced bodily fluid that had previously lacked a really good name. ‘Santorum’ sounds like it could be what that frothy mix of lube and fecal matter has always been called, and that’s why it’s caught on.
Yeah…that’s it!
The second reason is…I don’t know why, but Rick Santorum always struck me as a deeply repressed gay man, full of self-loathing, and trapped in his life as an anal retentive conservative Republican. You know…like a younger, more uptight, Eastern version of Larry Craig minus the restless leg syndrome. It wouldn’t surprise me if Santorum is one day discovered in a cheap motel room, tied up to the bed posts (wait…posts on a motel bed?!?) naked and face down, with a leather-clad young man, whip in hand, lashing and scolding him for being a bad boy. No santorum involved. Just punishment.
Yes…a Santorum presidential bid will cause Dan Savage’s Google monster to come alive with good clean fun and salacious innuendo. (That’s right…we’re talkin’ santorum innuendo.)
Speaking of which, Goldy leaves HA with his own legacy of Google search results. Google Luke Esser and the second entry still points to Goldy’s Luke Esser Fucks Pigs complaint to the Legislative Ethics Board. Sen. Esser lost the election, so I guess the Ethics Board never got around to following up on the complaint….
Or Google Bradley Marshall and the number three entry is Goldy’s Bradley Marshall is a pussy post. (The number two entry is Dan Savage’s contribution based on Goldy’s post.)
Bradley Marshall, a Seattle lawyer, was upset by something Michael Hood posted at Blatherwatch—a post that was both tame and factual. Marshall had a suspended law license at the time, and was under investigation by the Washington State Bar Association. It couldn’t have helped that he mailed a cease and desist letter using his official letterhead (implying he was licensed to practice law). The Bar Association was made aware. A year later, perhaps for totally unrelated reasons, the Washington Supreme Court disbarred him. Almost everyone came out a winner on that one.
Google David Irons and the second entry, Raging Bullshitter: the sad twisted tale of the Irons family feud documents some of the weaknesses (and strengths!) of the candidate for King County Executive. Irons lost.
Or, from another perspective, his mother won.
I read once that Santorum’s wife suffered a miscarriage many years back, and instead of the usual procedure whereby the hospital either disposes of the dead fetus, or is given a burial per family wishes, Santorum insisted on taking the dead fetus home with him so his kids could pass around the dead fetus and get to know their baby brother/sister. If this is even remotely true, this man is a off the charts fucking sick!!
Excellent post! I fully agree with you! Keep up the great writing!
If you do a Google search for “Republicans fuck goats”, HA comes in at number one.
Okay, I am now officially creeped out by Darryl. I hope he’s queer, ill-informed, and really bad at humor, because if not he’s got much more serious issues.
1
That did indeed happen. Santorum is American Taliban.
@1,5
That’s waaaay similar to what W “wrote” in “his” book, about how his mom (the execrable Barbara) had a miscarriage and kept the fetus in a jar, which she showed him as an adolescent.
Could these both be true?
Hey, I have an idea…let’s do this to Timmeh Eyman.
I started here (see post 26)…but we could make him a (bigger) laughingstock, and thereby protect the state from his fiendish villainy.
N W Barcus @ 4,
Awwww…you little flirt, you….
LS @ 6
Here you go:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/.....ge=printer
This dude should never have any authority over anyone.
Sorry guys:
This post and this thread are WAY out of line.
No matter what you think of his politics or his personal life, this stuff is wildly inappropriate.
I would strongly recommend this post and all comments be deleted from the site.
@10, Go fuck yourself.
For a change, I happen to agree with Unkl Witz.
Doesnt matter what side of the political spectrum a person or politician is on, making up lies and falsehoods in an attempt destroy their name is just plain wrong.
Its no wonder that Dan Savage and goldy are not taken seriously.
goldy and savage seem to play the joseph goebbels game very well.
Precisely, what are the “lies and falsehoods” posted here? Rick Santorum is a dangerous motherfucker, who needs to be brought down big time.
@14
read the first sentence of the post by darryl…
duh.
As I’ve noted previously, the trolls who are understood to fuck goats, produce Goatorum as a result:
I have no idea how they manage the logistics of all this — and don’t want to know.
I agree with Troll. This post was a hoot, Darryl.
Class acts all around.
15
Don’t see what you’re talking about. Maybe I’m dim, but any shit hurled in Santorum’s way seems fair to me. He is an arrogant, self-righteous, piece of shit who needs to disappear from the national scene. Do you honestly disagree?
what he is or isnt is not relevant.
smear campaigns, invented innuendo, outright lies, are just downright childish and dishonest…
Poor Puddybud. A big touter of “teh google” skillz…
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/.....24446.html
Guess it’s going to have to be “teh bing” now…
Always does what Glenn tells him to do. Too freaking funny!
YLB
That Puddy even listens to a crazy fuck like Beck attests to his insanity. I need to shower if I just walk by a television with Beck’s show on.
@22
While Beck’s show is filled with crazy right-wing nonsense, I don’t think the man is political, for a couple of reasons.
Prior to being on Fox he was a radio DJ who pulled pranks. He was well into adulthood before before making a switch to political talk and this wasn’t a gradual thing, it was a sudden shift. People just don’t do this sort of thing very often.
I’ve tried to parody Beck a few times and as crazy as the man is you can’t parody him. He’s already a parody. He’s taken every right wing notion and stereotype and blown it up 1000% and thrown in a crazy high school history to boot.
I think Beck’s committed the ultimate punking and it’s gotten out of control and to a place where he can’t back down. Remember the mystery illness that was going to take him off the air? Where’d that go. I think Beck’s looking for an exit to get out of the monster he’s created.
“…that frothy mix of petrolatum and fecal matter that drips from a troll’s ass after sex with his/her favorite male goat.”
My introducing the, um, allegorical discussion of Republican goatfucking to our political discourse might be one of the better political contributions of my life or it might be one of the worst. I’m not really sure. It’s certainly nothing I’ve ever bragged about to my dear Ms. Wingnut, who doesn’t quite get things allegorical. heh- It certainly has taken on a life of its own though, hasn’t it? I don’t even have to bring it up anymore.
23
If Beck doesn’t believe his nonsense but just spews if for dollars, the fucker deserves his own special hell. Ripping apart a country for personal gain is about as bad as it gets.
24
Someone had to take on the tawdry task of exposing the sick relationship between Republicans and goats, and I commend your courage.
@25
you could the same about any number of political “commentators” from both sides of the aisle…they all do it for the money – anybody who doesnt believe that is a lemming ass fool.
@24
I always thought the Republican was the top, not the goat. Who knew?
Oh man, LMAO. And Luke Esser has converted to labor lobbyist for the SEIU–less surprising that he would do that than that a SEIU local would be interested. Did they forget to read his resume?
@26 “Someone had to take on the tawdry task of exposing the sick relationship between Republicans and goats, and I commend your courage.”
Well, somebody had to do it.
@28 “I always thought the Republican was the top, not the goat. Who knew?”
I knew something was wrong when the Klown’s head exploded in 2008 and there were reports of goat shit on all the walls, floor and ceiling.
It was allegorical up until I learned of the Republican in Georgia, Neal Horsley, who admitted to fucking horses, the wingnut in Federal Way whose wife caught him fucking the family dog out on the deck, and then all the redneck wingnuts who trekked to Enumclaw to fuck that poor horse over there. Didn’t one of them get kicked to death?
That reminds me – do you know how a Republican practices safe sex? They paint an big “X” on the goats that kick. heh-
I didn’t fuck no horse, I fucked a mule.
http://crooksandliars.com/john.....blican-can
Oh yeah, that’s right, Neal Horsley fucked mules. And washing machines. Oh, and water melons.
But if he had a goat, I’m sure he would have fucked it too.
22 – I feel the exact same way. The man is a charlatan and a demagogue of the worst sort. Puddybud has swallowed this guy’s bullshit for years and has brought it here to the threads over and over again.
Michael, he is totally political. He was invited to the Koch brother’s big confab near Palm Springs. He is a total toady to right wing big money. Sure he’s a circus performer but he’s a multi-millionaire because of it and he knows how his bread is buttered.
Yes, he is self parody but he’s set for life and all he has to do now is keep taking it to a new level until he flames out and cashes out. That moment may be near but never underestimate the resilience of the fear mongerer.
@34
Every time I see Beck I can’t help but think that he’s going to yell “ha, ha, psyc!” at any moment. I can’t help but look at his act as one big gag, one that’s made him really rich, to be sure. But, all the man did prior to going all political all of the sudden was pull gags. Who’s to say this isn’t this is the worlds biggest prank on his part?
Beck jumped the shark when he took over MLK Jr Day in DC. It’s beyond money now. He’s a fucking megalomaniac who has tasted power and control. He knows that the more he stirs the pot, the more he gets. I couldn’t tell you exactly how it’s going to play out, but I’m pretty sure that it’s going to get a hell of a lot uglier.
@36
I dunno steve – I think his popularity will eventually run its course and he will fade away….they all do.
its all about money and ego.
@37 It’d be nice if you’re right. I usually ignore him but watched a little during the Egyptian uprising. It seems that he’s no longer on a left to right scale. Instead, he’s simply delivering some crazy shit. My “commies to the left, fascists to the right, and I don’t cotton to either one” needs modification to include something about “teh crazy” because there’s just too much of that these days.