by Goldy, 12/27/2009, 12:38 AM

2 Kings 2:23-24

23 Then he went up from there to Bethel; and as he was going up the road, some youths came from the city and mocked him, and said to him, “Go up, you baldhead! Go up, you baldhead!”
24 So he turned around and looked at them, and pronounced a curse on them in the name of the LORD. And two female bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the youths.

Discuss.

86 Responses to “New Feature: HA Bible Study!”

1. J. Whorfin spews:

Is the lesson “Don’t mess with Elisha”?

2. Scott spews:

I think the fact the 42 youths were killed ties in nicely to the answer to life, the universe and everything.

3. Roger Rabbit spews:

@1 No, it’s an investing allegory. The lesson is, when bears show up on Wall Street, arrogant assholes lose the most.

4. spyder spews:

Old testament malarkey = questionable outcomes?

5. spyder spews:

quasi-overview docudrama makes bad tv???

6. The Raven spews:

God loves ravens?

7. Steve spews:

I see that our holier-than-thou Christian, Puddy, was here on Christmas day spewing his usual wingnut hatred towards all things good and decent. On Christmas day!!

8. Puddybud Remembers Progressives Forget spews:

Goldy, why did you use the New King James? Didn’t you recently read one of your own Libtardos claim using the NKJV is Satanic… wait a minute… maybe that’s why you chose it on purpose. Let’s see if this libtardo fesses up to their NKJV comment before Puddy places his comment here. Hmmm…?

Steve, how does this tie into Elisha? Another non sequitur from the moronic king of HA non sequiturs. Elisha became God’s next prophet of Israel receiving a double portion of Elijah’s spirit after Elijah went up in the fiery chariot. These 42 youths were teasing Elisha telling him to go up to heaven like Elijah recently did. Next the bears mauled them, but it didn’t say the bears killed them. Also with 42 youths they probably were all around him stopping him from going to Bethel and performing his God given duties.

Hmmm…

hatred towards all things good and decent.

Steve places another of his stupid and worthless accusations so let’s review the facts…

1) Roger Dumb Bunny accuses Cynical of Goat Sex – Puddy responds. Enjoying goat sex is a good and decent sex act according to Steve.

2) Puddy identifies YOUR president’s personal Christmas ornaments with Mao Tse Tung etc. Mao is a good and decent man according to Steve.

3) Puddy identifies five of YOUR president’s San Francisco supporters who killed a man. Killing an innocent man is a good and decent thing according to Steve.

4) Puddy identifies a grandmother who gave a marijuana laced brownie to her 3 year old grandson. Giving MJ to a minor in your custody is a good and decent thing according to Steve.

5) Puddy placed YOUR president’s 10 best foreign mistakes. Being identified by Stratfor as a weak president isn’t a good and decent thing according to Steve.

6) Puddy identified another Dummocraptic big money man who illegally used underaged girls as personal sex slaves is a good and decent thing according to Steve.

7) Puddy responding to the known monomaniacal chronologically pathetic HA arschloch for his feckless commentary wasn’t a good and decent thing according to Steve.

8) Puddy wondered if the black man guarding John Effin Kerry was a BlackWater agent especially after all the negative comments John Effin Kerry has made this year against BlackWater. Butt, BlackWater guarding John Effin Kerry isn’t a good and decent thing according to Steve.

9) Puddy responded to HA’s arschloch when he said showing the spirit of Christmas was stupid right wing bullshit. Showing the Christmas spirit wasn’t a good and decent thing according to Steve.

9. czechsaaz spews:

Oh Puuuuuddyyyyyy,

I too have an ornament with a famous Andy Warhol painting on it. I’m also a huge fan of Don DeLilo.

The barrista, poor dear working on Chirstmas, told me to “have a great holiday.” I tipped her well and I don’t think she’s condemned to hell for taking the Christ out of Christmas.

Always focus on the minutiae. Find the silliest, most inconsequential thing and try to make it the most important thing since whatever they had before sliced bread. That’s why your brand of religion / political philosophy is dying.

Kwanzaa!

10. Troll spews:

New Feature: HA Koran Study!

Sura (8:55) – Surely the vilest of animals in Allah’s sight are those who disbelieve

Sura (48:29) – Muhammad is the messenger of Allah. And those with him are hard (ruthless) against the disbelievers and merciful among themselves

Sura (9:30) – And the Jews say: Ezra is the son of Allah, and the Christians say: The Messiah is the son of Allah… Allah (Himself) fights against them. How perverse are they!

Sura (8:12) – I will cast terror into the hearts of those who disbelieve. Therefore strike off their heads and strike off every fingertip of them

Sura (9:123) – O you who believe! Fight those of the unbelievers who are near to you and let them find in you hardness

11. Troll spews:

PS Mohammed was a pig.

12. Puddybud Remembers Progressives Forget spews:

checksaaz,

Andy Warhol ornament – irrelevant to the “Bible Study”. Will your comment be removed? Focusing on the minutiae is your claim to fame.

13. Daddy Love spews:

Power corrupts. Elisha had the bears maul the youths because he could.

And the Mao Xmas ornament was created by a schoolchild as one of the many sent out by the WH to be decorated by children and hung on the WH tree. Only decoupage could be used. The ornament says nothing about the Obamas and speaks volumes about the intellectual dishonesty of the Right.

14. czechsaaz spews:

@12

Are you so ignorant of modern and pop art that you don’t get the reference?

15. Puddybud Remembers Progressives Forget spews:

chechsaaz,

Puddy was never a Warhol sycophant. Puddy never saw the “value” of his “art”. Since you like him buy another!

16. Puddybud Remembers Progressives Forget spews:

So Daddy Love, why did the WH say they were “unaware” the Mao ornament was on the Christmas tree? Of course Daddy Love has nothing to say about Mao and his “thoughts”.

What a tard you are Daddy Love.

17. Zotz spews:

Shorter version:

Evil, vengeful bearded sky god acts out cuz’ his homey gets dissed by some neighborhood kids.

18. YellowPup spews:

I think the lesson is clear: you can insult a man all you want, but leave his hair out of it. Or risk death by angry female bears.

19. Michael spews:

See what happened back in the days before handguns. Nowadays bears wouldn’t dare maul anyone because someone might be caring a concealed handgun.

20. Michael spews:

Oops, carrying a concealed, not caring. The edit function isn’t working.

21. Michael spews:

Is the lesson don’t hate on balding Christians or you’ll get eaten by a bear?

Or maybe that The Bible is chock-full of all sorts of useless drivel?

22. @21 spews:

the bible is chock full of intresting stories, some of which have some real history in them, and it is on a par with the baravad gita (sp?) beowulf etc. and it behooves us to study it like we study the iliad and the odyssey. it’s not all “true” nor ws it even meant to be “true”, duh. And for many people they don’t get its subtler points, just like they don’t the ethos of the ancient Greeks, they don’t get Bhuddism or Judaism or Islam, either. In fact, most people are like that puddy dude who will misconstrue the bible and end up being some kind of fanatic who goes to church all the time. and who gets all bent out of shape if someone uses one particular incorrect translation of ancient aramaic as opposed to another one! it’s like those idiots who watch football all the time and get all hepped up about their team whether steelers hawks saints, etc. It’s just “feeling part of something” and the psych. benefit is a person feels reassured to have an identity linked to Bigger Things. It’s fairly typical conduct. And yes there are some personalities like the jihadists or like this kind of puddybuddy fanatic here who let religion take over their whole “thought” process….because of certain fundamental fears and weaknesses they have. It’s a lot of fear driving this desire to unite with a Big Thing in the Sky. The psychology of this is pretty simple, really. It’s the same roots of feeling “disgust” at “outsiders” and the “foreign”…other words for “threats”….and having to go on liberal blogs and blast more open minded people all the time, it’s a compensation mechanism for feeling small and afraid. That’s why no amount of facts, history or logic, like pointing out, “hey why are you celebrating a pagan log fire festival on Dec. 25th?” will ever “convince” them, it’s because they are not “thinking” in the first place but rather are emoting and expressing and being on a more primal, scared level. Like the cavemen who saw Big Gods in every thing.

23. YellowPup spews:

@19: :-) If only those 40 youths had been allowed to carry concealed automatic weapons.

And for some reason, Puddy doesn’t like this translation. Not gay enough, I guess.

24. czechsaaz spews:

@15

Well Puuuuddddyyyyy…

I don’t ask you to like Warhol, but if you looked at that ornament and took issue (which you clearly have) then you:

a: Lack the cultural knowledge to know it was Warhol.

b: Knew it was Warhol but wanted to make signigficant that which is not.

Answer ‘A’ makes you culturally ignorant. Answer ‘B’ makes you a douchebag.

Take your pick.

I think the music of Dave Matthews is insipid crap. But when I heard “Crash” on the PA at a Rossi event I didn’t try to make the argument that Rossi is a perv who believes that the most significant thing possible can be found between the legs of someone with their skirt up. Doing so would make me seem like, or actually be, an idiot.

25. RonK, Seattle spews:

I like to think it goes with the T-shirt slogan “age and guile will triumph over youth and skill”.

And yes, I’m a baldhead. Wanna make something of it? Go ahead, make my day.

26. Michael spews:

@22

I hear ya. I was hoping my comment might cause one of our true believer trolls to go on a rant.

27. Michael spews:

@24

Dave Matthews at a Rossi event? Could they pick a more liberal guy, to play for their conservative audience?

28. Puddybud Remembers Progressives Forget spews:

And for some reason, Puddy doesn’t like this translation. Not gay enough, I guess.

Wrong Yellow Doggy. Did you lift your leg and piss on yourself again? You have a faulty memory too like most HA Libtardos. So Puddy will remind you to start here and finish the thread.

Why are libtardos such mindless memory morons?

29. Puddybud Remembers Progressives Forget spews:

@15 a: Lack the cultural knowledge to know it was Warhol.

Puddy admitted this before. Puddy isn’t a Warhol whore like you!

b: Knew it was Warhol but wanted to make signigficant that which is not.

Absolutely not. Not being a Mao acolyte either how would Puddy know?

You have proven two things checksaaz,
1)You like Warhol
2)You like Mao

Nuff SAID!

30. don spews:

@8

Nope, it is conservatives that say the bible is too liberal. They plan to rewrite it.

Conservatives target the Bible

31. Puddybud Remembers Progressives Forget spews:

puddybuddy fanatic here who let religion take over their whole “thought” process

Apparently you aren’t too acquainted with Jesus and His sayings are you?

32. Puddybud Remembers Progressives Forget spews:

Puddy knew ProudASS would chicken out! Nothing new!

33. @22now spews:

notice how the puddy dude ignores the fairly complex argument made above about his defective mental status and level of self awareness. This is like most authoritarian personality types; they’re just bullies, and if you smack them directly, they have no answer.

Instead, he goes off into puerile and juvenile name calling using memes of bodily functions (“Did you lift your leg and piss on yourself again?”) and the mocking the weak theme (in this case, persons with mental disabilityies (“HA Libtardos”) that is so reminiscent of the debates I had against the rural crackers when I was in 5th grade. He refers to himself in the third person (“So Puddy will remind you to start here and finish the thread”) using imperative mood like he’s some kind of authority. Like I said, this is a small fearful person who blows himself up by blowing at anonymous people on a blog and not even answering their arguments.

He continues in the next post: “@15 a: Lack the cultural knowledge to know it was Warhol.

Puddy admitted this before. Puddy isn’t a Warhol whore like you!”
Rather than proceed to the next logical point of the argument, which is that being culturally ignorant of Warhold, he is basically unaware of the meaning or message of this ornament so he has nothing to say, he pivots immediately to a low attack, calling someone a whore merely for displaying cultural knowledge. This is typical of right wing small minded authoritarian types; our knowledge base threatens them on a reptilian level; they attack knowledge as something perverted or gay (A Warhold whore would presumably be man on man whoring) the lowest, vilest thing they can think of to say. It’s also the lowest, stupidest and basically most boring thing to say, very much like trying to debate a fifth grader or a cave man.

“Knew it was Warhol but wanted to make signigficant that which is not.

Absolutely not.”

Um — fail.

“Not being a Mao acolyte” — the constant need to twist all who disagree into the Other, the Alien, the Communist, the robotic mind controlled…this allows you to spew hate with your reptilian brain, and you don’t have to answer any of their arguments

“either how would Puddy know.

You have proven two things checksaaz,
1)You like Warhol
2)You like Mao”

Again, the puerile name calling. If you know of Warhol, you’re a gay fag artsy intellectual. wow puddydude, you certainly scored on us liberals there. You’re right. We don’t hate gay people, the arts, or culture or intelligence the way you do. Noted.

And “you like Mao” because you have awareness a Mao token has a cultural significance again is the lowest vilest baiting kind of reptilian response. Puddy, do you hear me? I am saying you have the brain of a lizzard. You don’t respond on a factual or intelligent level, and you spew meaningless drivel like a fifth grader. You’re the equivalent of that fifth grade bully who calls names in the play yard.

We understand why you get off on this. Go ahead, continue, you enjoy it .. but pls. understand you’re lower than a snake, culturally, developmentally, ethically and rationally. Go ahead, show us your next repitlian response.

34. Seventy2002 spews:

A bad translation. Bears on the road to Bethel? I think not. It’s obvious the prophet was on the road to Bothel.

35. Roger Rabbit spews:

The Seahawks better get on their knees and pray, because they’re losing 41-3 in the 4th quarter — either that, or they’d better get OFF their knees and carry the freakin’ ball instead of falling to the ground.

36. k spews:

Come on now Pud, do you really believe the President himself reviewed and approved. or perhaps selected each ornament? Once again I come to the question are you idealogically blinded to reason or do you just kick up dust to see what happens?

37. Roger Rabbit spews:

@8 You wanna know what’s Satanic? I’ll tell you what’s Satanic! Voting Republican is Satanic. Why would anyone do that? Who wants to spend eternity in Hell?! You have to be very stupid and self-destructive to vote Republican.

38. czechsaaz spews:

@33

Thanks!

Puddy is the type who would blow up the Bamyan statues because he can’t comprehend the difference between “culturally significant” and “sacred” or “devotional.”

“I don’t do Nuance.” It makes my brain hurt.

39. Roger Rabbit spews:

Puddy is a babbling idiot.

40. Steve spews:

@8 Puddy sez: “so let’s review the facts”

What followed, of course, was one Puddyturd after another, pulled from his ass and posted as “facts”. What a fucking waste-of-time dunce.

So I wonder how Schafly’s rewrite of the Bible is going? What’s taking so long? I thought it’d just take a few weeks for the wingnuts to dump all the progressive and liberal ideals expressed in the Bible. heh- The wingnut Bible. A much shorter read, no doubt.

41. k spews:

Roger- I have raised several kids, and Pud reminds me of the 15-18 year stage (a little different for each, but it’s in that range) They are so convinced they know more than everyone else based on so little real wisdom. My oldest have grown out of it, and I have hopes for the remaining. I suspect it is hopeless for Pud.

42. Roger Rabbit spews:

@41 I suspect he’s autistic. No wait, that’s the wrong word … not to mention insulting to autistic people! What I’m trying to say is … gimme a minute … he’s an automaton.

43. Roger Rabbit spews:

Yay! The Seahawks just scored their first touchdown in four weeks! Now the score is only Green Bay 48, Seattle 10, with 4 minutes still remaining in the 4th quarter.

44. Roger Rabbit spews:

Game over. Seahawks lost. Again. Puddinghead is a chronic loser, too.

45. Mr. Cynical spews:

Goldy–
Please explain this…….
Puddy knows it is unacceptable and the result of years of the Jesse Jackson/Al Sharpton/Lunatic Leftist enabling.


Salvation Army Major Philip Wise was killed outside the organization’s community center in North Little Rock, Arkansas as his three young children looked on.

The suspects are described as two African-American males and are believed to be ‘armed with handguns.’ Police are following up on leads, but are asking the public to help them by contacting them with any bit of information they may have.

We must educate Black Youth in the ways of Conservatism. We must encourage families to stay together…and have children IN WEDLOCK.

The Bible is never wrong Goldy.
Only people are wrong…we are ALL sinners.
Bible constantly fall short, misuse the Bible and pervert it.

46. Puddybud Remembers Progressives Forget spews:

Wow this @22 moron has givine Puddy much to work with…

Instead, he goes off into puerile and juvenile name calling using memes of bodily functions (”Did you lift your leg and piss on yourself again?”)

Fool, it was Yellow Pup who claimed the Bible Passage wasn’t gay enough. Of course this was lost on your sorry small celled mind.

Oh so HA Liberal Retards makes your day? Libtardo!

he is basically unaware of the meaning or message of this ornament

Who cares about the meaning or message of the ornament. Why have Mao on a Christmas tree. Did Mao suppport Christmas being a communist? What a fool you are.

You have proven two things checksaaz,
1)You like Warhol
2)You like Mao”

Again, the puerile name calling.

This guy has scrambled brains. Heh heh heh.

This is the fool de resistance…

Like I said, this is a small fearful person who blows himself up by blowing at anonymous people on a blog and not even answering their arguments.

Hey moron, Puddy been to a Drinking Libtardos. Peeps who were there have met Puddy and PacMan face to face. You on the other hand hide behind the moniker of @.

understand you’re lower than a snake

Really. Well that means Puddy is still above you!

See ya!

Keep Stupid… You are doing it so well.

47. Puddybud Remembers Progressives Forget spews:

Come on now Pud, do you really believe the President himself reviewed and approved. or perhaps selected each ornament?

K, you and Puddy both know if some whack job conservative was on the tree GWB would have been accused of making a political statement.

The Prosecution Rests Your Honor.

48. Puddybud Remembers Progressives Forget spews:

7. Steve spews: I see that our holier-than-thou Christian, Puddy, was here on Christmas day spewing his usual wingnut hatred towards all things good and decent.

40. Steve spews: @8 Puddy sez: “so let’s review the facts” What followed, of course, was one Puddyturd after another, pulled from his ass and posted as “facts”. What a fucking waste-of-time dunce.

Go back and check this thread fool! Everything written in that #8 post was truthful. Steve is again caught drinking his Stupid Solution!

Drink Stupid Steve.

49. bluesky spews:

Goldy, here is the video enactment of that “verse” from Kings.

50. Daddy Love spews:

16 Pud

So Daddy Love, why did the WH say they were “unaware” the Mao ornament was on the Christmas tree?

Because they were unaware that “the Mao ornament” was on the tree.

However, the children who deoupaged the ornament in question may or may not have been aware of who Mao Zedong was, such as that he was one of the most important figures in all 6000 or so years of Chinese history. They may or may not have been aware that he ruled the most populous nation on earth more or less single-handedly for 27 years. The Oxford reference Online says of him, “Mao Zedong must be counted among the half-dozen most important political actors in modern world history.” So there are easy-to-understand reasosn why an image would be easy to obtain and why someone might think to use it. However, maybe there is some sort of Maoist Communist child out there. I really doubt it, but so fucking what either way?

Of course Daddy Love has nothing to say about Mao and his “thoughts”.

Why should I? It was not the subject under discussion and I really don’t give a damn about Mao or his “thoughts.” I’ve never understood why what someone doesn’t say is your favorite subject. Is it because if gives you the freest possible rein for your fabricated calumnies?

I suspect that in this affair you were just happy that this silly Warhol image gave you an opportunity for an unjustified and duplicitous cheap shot against President of the United States Barack Obama.

51. Mr. Cynical spews:

Attempting to approach the Bible totally lacking in Faith can make for….a waste of time. Also, anyone who believes that everything is revealed in Scripture needs to read:

Deuteronomy 29:29 (New International Version)

29 The secret things belong to the LORD our God, but the things revealed belong to us and to our children forever, that we may follow all the words of this law.

Things like suffering, babies dying are mysteries to be revealed later.
Thru Scripture, God has revealed what we need to know in this Earthly life.
The word of God is sufficient.
It is perspicuous.

52. Mr. Cynical spews:

2 Kings 2:23-24
New International Version (NIV)

Elisha Is Jeered

23 From there Elisha went up to Bethel. As he was walking along the road, some youths came out of the town and jeered at him. “Go on up, you baldhead!” they said. “Go on up, you baldhead!” 24 He turned around, looked at them and called down a curse on them in the name of the LORD. Then two bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the youths.

This is one of the most confusing & controversial Bible verses. Do you take it literally? Or as a message that:
God’s messengers deserve respect.
Words matter…choose your words carefully.
Actions can have consequences far beyond what we intend.

PS–
HuffPo had an article where this was mentioned a few months ago…trying to make a point that the Bible is flawed.

53. Daddy Love spews:

52 Cyn

No, it’s not “Elisha Is Jeered,” it’s “Elisha has his widdle feelings hurt so he called upon an apparently uncaring God who, on behalf of the thin-skinned weenie, caused the deaths of a bunch of kids acting like kids.”

Elisha needs some prophet-strength Anger Management courses and some big-boy pants to put on.

54. Daddy Love spews:

In Cynical’s “world” (if it can even be considered to be one):

- The Bible is never wron because the Bible tells us that it is never wrong
- When the Bible is wrong, remember: the Bible is never wrong
- When the Bible contradicts itself, it really doesn’t. And even when it does–shut up!
- Things like suffering, babies dying are mysteries to be revealed later. SO don’t worry about the omnipotent, wholly good God of the Bible standing by duding the Holocaust and the Armenian Genocide (1.5 million dead). Those Armenians were probably going to diss a bald guy or something–you know, there were going to do something that the Lord apparently sees fit to do something about. As for the Holocaust, just keep walking, nothing to see here.

None fo this could possibly mean that, hypothetically, there IS NO Big Bad Guy In The Sky who is all-good and all-powerful yet allows millions of the innocent examples of the precious humans He created in His image (because the Bible tells us that He is white–or something) to me massacred for no reason while their murderers and torturers die in their beds.

Stalin – died in bed
Pol Pot — died in bed

Nope, that’s not a solution that can even be contemplated. And when the fanatical brainwashed actually had massive political and military power, people would be tried and executed (well, sometimes tried) for even asking if it might be possible for such a crazy, contradictory, murder-tolerating God not to exist. And Cynical would be in the front row eating popcorn. Because he’s a good Christian.

55. Max Rockatansky spews:

the lefts hatred of Christianity continues….

56. Puddybud Remembers Progressives Forget spews:

Daddy Love sez

this silly Warhol image

Thanks DL. checksaaz has been dispatched!

57. Mr. Cynical spews:

Daddy Love–
You worship yourself…your own knowledge.
If you can’t see it or explain it, it does not exist.

Deuteronomy 29:29 (New International Version)

29 The secret things belong to the LORD our God, but the things revealed belong to us and to our children forever, that we may follow all the words of this law.

I have met waaaaaaaaaay more intellectual folks than you who spent most of their life fighting submission…arrogantly random atoms banging around without a Creator explains everything we see or know.

The Bible gives us enough knowledge to get by and understand Salvation. There are mysteries God will reveal at the appropriate time.
MumboJumbo???
If you are wrong DL, you will never know.

PS–
When you go hiking in the Cascades, bring Bear Spray…and a big gun.

58. headless lucy spews:

Bertrand Russell was an atheist and he had a full head of hair even into his 90′s.

59. headless lucy spews:

re 55: The left doesn’t hate Christianity, it hates right wing Christianist Clerics who cannot understand Jesus H. Christ’s statement that His Kingdom is not of this world and continually attempt to impose their halfwit notions on the smart Christians who understand Christ’s word.

I forgive you for your ignorance and smallness of mind and heart, but that does not mean that I will not oppose you.

If you see that as hatred of Christianity, that is your failing, not mine.

Go in peace.

60. headless lucy spews:

re 57: When you take a dump, bring double-ply Northern. I know you’ll need it.

61. Puddybud Remembers Progressives Forget spews:

Jesus H. Christ’s statement

Sorry that doesn’t compute.

62. headless lucy spews:

re 61: That’s the problem. You are a fucking idiot.

63. Max Rockatansky spews:

@59….whole lotta assumptions and projecting in that post…..nice try poser.

64. headless lucy spews:

re 55: “….whole lotta assumptions and projecting in that post…..nice try poser.”

I’m rubber, you’re glue…

65. Puddybud Remembers Progressives Forget spews:

With that headles@62s coming from you Puddy knows Puddy is on the correct path.

And yes we all knew you@64 are a used prophylactic!

66. Tlazolteotl spews:

You people are missing the obvious lesson behind this Bible study, which is that Goldy saw a few more hairs in the sink this morning ;-)

Hey, don’t get mad and sic the female bears on me! I think bald guys are sexy!

67. Max Rockatansky spews:

@64…whats wrong? wife not handing out blowjobs tonight?

68. headless lucy spews:

re 67: feeling a little gay?

69. Michael spews:

@55

Ever heard of liberation theology?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Liberation_theology

Some of my best friends are leftist Christians.

70. Max Rockatansky spews:

@68….not particularly…sounds like you need a booty call from gman…..

71. Mathew "RennDawg" Renner spews:

What the children were mocking was not Elisha’s bald head. When they said “Go up, thou bald head; go up thou bald head” they were mocking a miracle that God had just preformed. I am of corse refering to II Kings 2:11 And it came to pass, as they (Elijah and Elisha) still went on and talked, that, behold, there appeared a chariot of fire, and horses of fire and parted them both asunder; and Elijah went up by a whirlwind into heaven. All scripture is from the Holy Bible King James Version. The only version that you can legially post on here without permission of the copyright owner.

When you mock God you risk his wrath. God made each of us. He has the right to punish us as he sees fit. If God trully gave us all what we deserve he would open the earth and dump us ALL into Hell. “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;” Romans 3:23 KJV

http://www.findtheopendoor.org

72. Alki Postings spews:

#10 is correct. Islam, Christianity, Hinduism, etc, are all just silly made up superstition by stupid scared humans who want an explanation for lightening and why the crops didn’t work well this year. That’s it. Weak minded people (Puddy, Troll, etc) need a magical sky sun god to make sense of the world. Sad. Magic won’t make them good people, they’re bad people at heart with more hatred and vile than love and respect.

Every one of the billion Hindu’s know THEIR gods are real. The Muslims believe in THEIR prophets, the Jews know THEIR mountain god is real, the Native Americans trust in their tribal gods, the Romans believed in theirs, as did the Norse, Inuit, Egyptian, etc. Everything thinks THEIR god/gods/goddess are real and all the OTHERs are fake.

An atheist is someone who thinks there are 263 made up silly religions with fictional gods. A “true believer” is someone who thinks there are 262 made up silly religions with fictional gods…and ONE real one, theirs.

Won’t all the Christians be in for a shock after a LIFETIME of going to church only to find out the Hindus were right, or maybe the Navajo. FUNNY

73. Puddybud Remembers Progressives Forget spews:

Matthew@71,

The mocking of Elisha to go up to heaven is exactly the same thing Puddy wrote in #8. Thanks for the link. Puddy will check it out. Butt don’t expect these God-hating leftist progressive atheists to understand things from God when their minds reside in Hades.

And then what will Alki say except trying to get Pasted when Jesus returns in the clouds of Glory…? Oops… Puddy was right!

74. rhp6033 spews:

Personally, I think the scripture simply means: mock bald men at your own peril.

75. Mr. Cynical spews:

Daddy Love and all the HA Atheists–
Did you know that C.S. Lewis was a hardcore Atheist…until he was 31!
His conversion to Christianity was described in this famous quote–


“You must picture me alone in that room in Magdalen, night after night, feeling, whenever my mind lifted even for a second from my work, the steady, unrelenting approach of Him whom I so earnestly desired not to meet. That which I greatly feared had at last come upon me. In the Trinity Term of 1929 I gave in, and admitted that God was God, and knelt and prayed: perhaps, that night, the most dejected and reluctant convert in all England.”
– Surprised by Joy

Can you picture this??
Lewis was a deep thinker.
His quotes are deeply thought provoking to those with an open heart and mind.
Closed hearted and Closed minded—read it anyway.

76. Mr. Cynical spews:

C.S. Lewis was a deep thinker.
His quotes are deeply thought provoking to those with an open heart and mind.
Closed hearted and Closed minded—read them anyway.

Here are a few more of my favorites!


My argument against God was that the universe seemed so cruel and unjust. But how had I got this idea of just and unjust? A man does not call a line crooked unless he has some idea of a straight line. What was I comparing this universe with when I called it unjust? – Mere Christianity

I am trying here to prevent anyone saying the really foolish thing that people often say about Him: ‘I’m ready to accept Jesus as a great moral teacher, but I don’t accept His claim to be God.’ That is the one thing we must not say. A man who was merely a man and said the sort of things Jesus said would not be a great moral teacher. He would either be a lunatic — on the level with the man who says he is a poached egg — or else he would be the Devil of Hell. You must make your choice. Either this man was, and is, the Son of God: or else a madman or something worse. You can shut Him up for a fool, you can spit at Him and kill Him as a demon; or you can fall at His feet and call Him Lord and God. But let us not come with any patronizing nonsense about His being a great human teacher. He has not left that open to us. He did not intend to. – Mere Christianity, pages 40-41.

77. Mr. Cynical spews:

And here are a few more brief quotes on Atheism for you to ponder–


“Atheism turns out to be too simple. If the whole universe has no meaning, we should never have found out that it has no meaning. . .” – Mere Christianity

“Now that I am a Christian I do have moods in which the whole thing looks improbable: but when I was an atheist I had moods in which Christianity looked terribly probable.” – Mere Christianity

And here is one for you Open-Minded Liberals…a warning to be very careful about what you read!!


“A young man who wishes to remain a sound Atheist cannot be too careful of his reading. There are traps everywhere — ‘Bibles laid open, millions of surprises,’ as Herbert says, ‘fine nets and stratagems.’ God is, if I may say it, very unscrupulous.” – Surprised by Joy

78. Mr. Cynical spews:

God gave us Free Choice to accept, reject, ignore, defame Christ. Lewis had an amazing revelation on Free Choice–

In Surprised by Joy, Lewis described that final time before he put his faith in Christ as a period of free and enlightened choice:


“The odd thing was that before God closed in on me, I was in fact offered what now appears a moment of wholly free choice…. I became aware that I was holding something at bay, or shutting something out…. I felt myself being, there and then, given a free choice. I could open the door or keep it shut; I could unbuckle the armor or keep it on. Neither choice was presented as a duty; no threat or promise was attached to either, though I knew that to open the door or to take off the corslet meant the incalculable.”

Free Choice–so wonderful.
I can totally relate to what Lewis was saying here.
Free Choice is what also causes horrific catastrophes.
Free Choice has eternal consequences.

I would hope you leftists who claim to be enlightened and free thinkers would consider not only what Lewis has shared…but also read what John Calvin wrote 500 years ago in
INSTITUTES OF THE CHRISTIAN RELIGION

It is a long, sometimes difficult read.
2 volumes.
There are also books that condense Calvin’s writings.

Why not invest time in your Spiritual pursuits?
Atheists have no hope for the future.
They die…and that’s it.
Very pathetic.
No God. No Eternal Life.
What you see is it.

No wonder you KLOWNS are such downers!
You are depressing and pathetic.
But Thank God…you have the Free Choice to change all that in the blink of an eye.

Ask rhp.
I suspect he knows the Truth.
And it has nothing to do with Politics.
It has everything to do with FAITH that is in Christ, From the Spirit, Through God’s Word, with confidence and within God’s Church.

79. Steve spews:

Who the fuck needs to wait for ol’ St. Pete when we have a wingnut KLOWN ready and willing to sort us all out right here on earth. Sigh! Would it be asking God for too much for us to pray that our resident KLOWN keep his shallow and insipid thoughts on faith to himself?

80. Mr. Cynical spews:

Steve-

Let’s talk about Tollycraft Yachts instead.
Something you know quite a bit about.
Right steve?

81. headless lucy spews:

re 80: Why not talk about Universal Hovercrafts? It’s a great way to board your Tollycraft Yacht — especially with a ‘Mission Accomplished’ sign behind your silver tea-caddy.

82. Rujax! spews:

Gee..p’dumbass is in his sophomoric, supercillious craptactically superstitious element here.

Yayyyy P’dummy…go, babeeee!!

Suckasuckasucka…klablammo! The prosecution rests!

83. Rujax! spews:

The Flying Spaghetti Monster gave us Free Choice to accept, reject, ignore, defame Pasta. Lewis had an amazing revelation on Free Choice–

There.

I like THAT better!

84. Mathew "RennDawg" Renner spews:

There is no such thing as an athiest. Anyone who says that they are an athiest, agnostic or non-believer deep down knows that God is real. They just deny Him because they do not want accountabality.

85. The Raven spews:

#84: who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men? RennDawg knows! Bwa-ha-ha.

#76: “My argument against God was that the universe seemed so cruel and unjust. But how had I got this idea of just and unjust? A man does not call a line crooked unless he has some idea of a straight line. What was I comparing this universe with when I called it unjust?”

This is a very nice argument, but it predates Jesus’s birth by about 400 years. It is not specifically Christian. It is from the pagan philosopher Plato. Lewis, believing some rather strange things about time, had no problem with this.

By the way, Goldy’s quoted text is from the Jewish Publication Society’s Tanakh (Law, Prophets, Writings), which is probably the best English translation of what Christians call the Old Testament.

86. Max Rockatansky spews:

Rujax must have had a successful Christmas breaking church windows and setting a few fires.