Mayor Nickels Faces the Perfect Storm

That’s it, I’m fed up with Mayor Nickels!

First the December snow storm, and now this record breaking heat wave… I mean, I don’t ever remember the mercury topping a hundred degrees when Paul Schell was in charge. And while throughout the campaign Nickels’ challengers have talked an awful lot about the weather, isn’t it time Seattle finally elected a mayor who could do something about it?

That’s why HA is officially endorsing Halle Berry for mayor.


Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate Mayor Nickels’ impressive record on the environment, but after watching X-Men, it just doesn’t compare to Berry’s psionic ability to control the weather with her mind. I mean, think back to last December’s nearly unprecedented snow storm—sure, rock salt and snow plows would’ve been nice… or Berry could’ve just cleared our streets with a thawing wave of her hand. And ask yourself, unlike Nickels, would a Mayor Berry have allowed her beloved (and un-air conditioned) city to suffer through yesterday’s 103 degree heat? I don’t think so.

Yeah, Mayor Nickels sure looks sexy in that hot, skin-tight, black leather body suit of his, but Berry ain’t too shabby in that department either. And, she can control the weather. With. Her. Mind.

Vote for Halle Berry for mayor.


  1. 1

    rhp6033 spews:

    How hot was it????

    It was so hot that two trees were fighting over a dog.

    It was so hot that farmers fed their chickens shaved ice to prevent them from laying hard-boiled eggs.

    It was so hot that Dick Cheney waterboarded himself.

    It was so hot that North Korea test-launched a Popsicle.

    Source: How hot is it jokes

  2. 2

    rhp6033 spews:

    In some inner cities, when weather gets this hot the Fire Dept. opens the hydrants so kids can play in the spray of water to cool off. If they don’t do it, it might become a problem for the mayor come election day.

    I can see the headlines now: “Fire hydrants opened on Mayor’s street before they were opened elsewhere”.

  3. 3



    “Yeah, Mayor Nickels sure looks sexy in that hot, skin-tight, black leather body suit of his…”

    Ugggh…not the image I wanted to start my morning with!

  4. 5

    Melting in Seattle spews:

    It’s SO hot.
    How hot is it?
    It’s so hot Mickey Rooney is dating Dolly Parton just for the shade!