Embracing bicycles? What’s next?

Joel Connelly:

But this week, council members allocated $8.1 million to study the “surface-transit option” in replacing the Alaskan Way Viaduct.

Surface transit is a pet idea of those who seem to be forming Seattle’s agenda these days and pushing for a gentrified, politically correct, largely childless, heavily taxed city, a place that embraces bicycles and exiles NBA basketball.

This is almost Falwell-esque:

I really believe that the pagans, and the abortionists, and the feminists, and the gays and the lesbians, the ACLU, People For the American Way — all of them who have tried to secularize America — I point the finger in their face and say “you helped this happen.”

Jesus, we embrace bicycles? And stopped having kids? We have gone too far.

To the hyper-sensitive, sports-hating, condom-using, tax-and-spend, Capitol Hill enviro-fascists, Joel points his finger at you.

Comments

  1. 1

    spews:

    Props, Will, for calling Joel out. Like you, I’ve been rather disappointed with Joel’s increasingly hostile tone towards these strawmen. It’s like Joel’s dream is for Seattle to become (remain?) an endless expanse of auto-centric mid-50’s suburban sprawl.

  2. 2

    Sstarr spews:

    Joel is absolutely right: kids love viaducts. Without viaducts to play under, I doubt any children would willingly live in this hell hole of a city. I take my 13 month old over to the I-5 viaduct at Ravenna every day for his fun playtime. On weekends, of course, we go to the Alaska Way viaduct and spend many an idyllic hour wandering in it’s shade. We play fun games like “what’s in the brown bag” and “kick the rat.” The robust air beneath the traffic strengthens his lungs. It’s my boy’s “secret garden.” I will not deprive him of his beloved viaduct.

    Remember, to attract kids and lower taxes it’s important to spend much less on parks and schools and much, much more on viaducts. And sports arenas. It also helps to not ride bicycles. Kids hate bicycles.

    Thank you, Mr. Connelly!

  3. 4

    Another TJ spews:

    What am I supposed to say after that Sstarr… simply brilliant.

    Agreed. Well done, Sstarr.

  4. 5

    Poster Child spews:

    I’m absolutely not making this up: The viduct I played under as a child has been converted to a terrain park for mountain bikers.

    Having said that, I can’t think of anything worse for climate change than having a lot of kids.

  5. 6

    chadt spews:

    Will,

    I realize it’s a slow news week. But you might try a little more fibre in your diet, perhaps abetted by deep breathing.
    If you get out more, fresh air might help.

  6. 7

    palamedes spews:

    I bow before your genius, Mr. Sstarr, and suggest that Mr. Connelly is overdue for retirement, preferably somewhere that doesn’t have to deal with newfangled things like bicycles and the “vermin” they attract.

  7. 8

    Nindid spews:

    The final straw for me with Connelly was his shameless performance shilling for Reichert opposite Nicole Brodeur just prior to the 2006 election. If Joe thinks that Reichert is a great guy then he is entitled to his opinion and has the bully pulpit from which to shout it out.

    What really got me going from both of them though is that they continually harped on Reichert’s supposed independence by referencing the smattering of votes that he took in futile opposition to the Republican majority. But, as anyone who was paying any attention already knew, Reichert himself explained that he was told where and when to cast these votes by the same Republican leaders from whom he was supposedly so independent.

    As one of the leading political columnists of Washington, Connelly surely knew about this story and yet chose to ignore it and play pure partisan politics at precisely the time when most of his readers would be paying the most attention.

    It is not that he supported Reichert in itself, but rather that he chose to mislead his viewers/readers in a completely unprofessional and unethical manner. He deserves to be handed his walking papers and get someone in there who will do the job of a journalist and be a respected voice. Maybe Connelly was at one point, but he is no longer.

    The P-I has recently found a new life, time to make use of it guys.

  8. 9

    Paul in West Seattle spews:

    Okay, Connelly is an idiot.

    However, as someone who has to cross the West Seattle Bridge during their daily commute, I’m equally as tired of listening to the “hyper-sensitive, sports-hating, condom-using, tax-and-spend, Capitol Hill enviro-fascists” As well.

    The arguments presented by both are ridiculous.

  9. 12

    ivan spews:

    Will’s just pissed because Joel was talking about him, and he can’t stand the truth.

  10. 13

    michael spews:

    contraceptives and bicycles = the downfall of mankind? WTF? Time for Joel to retire.

  11. 14

    Richard Pope spews:

    On a per-capita basis, (un)Sound Transit will cost Puget Sound area residents far more money than all of George W. Bush’s wars and deficits put together. $37 billion is about $12,000 per capita, with 3 million or so people in the area that would be paying the (un)Sound Transit taxes. That would be the equivalent of about $4 trillion on a national scale.

  12. 15

    MikeJ spews:

    I love the fact that he’s against high taxes AND hates those who would “exile” the NBA. True comedy gold there.

  13. 17

    Sstarr spews:

    @14

    I agree with your math.

    However, I disagree with the implication that the war is more burdensome than Sound Transit. You see, with Sound Transit we get shiny new trains! With Bush’s wars all you get is the fading fantasy of a free and democratic Iraq and far too many dead sailors, soldiers, airmen and marines.
    Me, I’ll gladly pay more for the shiny trains.

  14. 20

    skimaxpower spews:

    So, wait … are cyclists supposed to be pagans or secularists? Those are two very different beliefs.

  15. 23

    chadt spews:

    Roger,

    I’d have thought by now you’d have switched to polyester. It’s less combustible, and I’m sure that….

  16. 24

    bj spews:

    Can I have a finger pointed at me, too, even though I have kids, and don’t ride a bicycle, and shucks, I’m not even gay? But, I am brown; maybe that can get me some finger pointing.

    It’s hilarious that you don’t have to make this stuff up. I have a similar rant about the people who came here to this emerald paradise on the sound and decided to pave it over.

    I believe that human beings can build beauty as well as destroy it (no eco-fanatic here). But, there’s little in Seattle where I feel like human additions have framed the natural beauty, rather than destroying it. Compare this city to Sydney, or San Francisco, or Hong Kong, or even Paris or Verona, and I’m struck by how this is a city that remains beautiful in spite of everything that’s been done ot it, by the utter grandeur of its place. It doesn’t have to be like that.

    bj

  17. 25

    spews:

    Exiled? Who exiled the Sonics? They asked me to come to their games, and I said no.

    They asked me (and my taxpayer buddies) to put up a couple hundred million to rebuild a perfectly good sports arena, and I said no. And my elected representatives said no.

    And they said they were leaving town.

    They didn’t get exiled, dude. We had a discussion, they didn’t like the way the conversation went, and they left.

    P.S. I