REUTERS — The father of the unborn baby being carried by the 17-year-old daughter of Republican vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin is God, Palin said Tuesday in a statement released by the campaign of Republican presidential candidate John McCain.
The unexpected revelation, coming just one day after announcing that Alaska Gov. Palin’s daughter Bristol Palin is about five months pregnant, is intended to knock down criticism of the McCain campaign’s vetting process, while cementing Gov. Palin’s own standing with the Republican Party’s influential evangelical base. “We have been blessed with five wonderful children,” the Palin’s statement said, “And soon we will all be blessed with this miraculous birth.”
“Bristol and God are going to realize very quickly the difficulties of raising a child, which is why they will have the love and support of our entire family. We ask the media to respect our daughter and God’s privacy as has always been the tradition of children of candidates.”
An aide to Arthur Culvahouse, the chair of McCain’s vice presidential search committee, has confirmed that the campaign was aware of Bristol Palin’s condition before tapping her mother as a running mate, but considers virgin conception a “private, personal and religious matter” that would not impact Gov. Palin’s ability to carry out her duties.
In other news, the New York Post has found God’s MySpace page, where he describes himself as a “fucking redneck” who “lives to play hockey.” He also claims to be “in a relationship,” but states, “I don’t want kids.”
Which I suppose explains what happened to Jesus.