The other day I took a bike ride down the waterfront. I have to say the bike trail in the Southern part is pretty cool. I hope they expand that all the way up and maybe to the Sculpture Park. Still, riding by some of the recently torn out tracks from the old waterfront streetcar hit me surprisingly hard.

Sure, it’s tough to mourn a line that hasn’t been in service for the better part of a decade: Nobody really believed the route would come back any time soon, and with the tunnel, it has been a done deal for some time that they’d never have that streetcar along the waterfront. I’ve said before that I’m fine in theory with the bus route that replaced it, although I wish it ran both ways and more frequently.

Still, seeing the gravel beds without the tracks had a sense of permanence that the things in the above paragraph don’t. If you’d asked me before, I would have told you that the streetcar wasn’t coming back. But now I can say it with more conviction.

If this piece was written by anyone but Lou Guzzo (his archives are funky, scroll down to March 17), I’d assume it was satire on the hype around the NFL draft. For Guzzo, I think he thinks it’s a good idea.

Why Not Draft Opera Singers, Actors Like the NFL Does It?

Because it’s a terrible idea. Because nobody thinks it’s unfair that the best opera singers go to the best operas? I’m going to feel bad making fun of this if it’s actually satire.*

I’ve been an incurable football nut almost since birth, but even I have the feeling that the annual shindig called the National Football League draft is terribly overdone as entertainment, despite the valiant efforts of the league and the various owners to make it seem like the rebirth of old-time vaudeville.

Sure. Fans only have 16 games and a relatively short playoff, and they love the game, so they get excited when things like the draft, the combine, and the when next season’s schedule comes out. That’s fine: if there’s a market for it, let people watch it. People get excited about all sorts of things.

After all, what on earth is so exciting about watching an annual supermarket for excessively high priced human beef? Why in the world don’t we get that hysterical, say, over drafting talent in many other walks of life. Let’s say, grand opera, for instance. I can just hear the announcer at a Grand Opera “draft” now:

Why don’t we get hyst… Why… don’t we get that hysterical over drafting opera singers? For starters, we can’t really get excited about an event that doesn’t happen. Second, the event doesn’t happen because the operas don’t compete against each other in a league so there wouldn’t be anyone to organize the draft. And third even if there was an opera league, singers can go wherever they want to perform.

“And now, folks, please give me your undivided attention. Here is the announcement we’ve all been waiting for. Speight Jenkins, general manager of the Seattle Opera Company, will step up to the microphone and announce his first pick from among the tenors. Speight….”

Does Lou Guzzo think the NFL drafts by position? Otherwise, why would he have a pick among the tenors? Is this satire? Isn’t satire supposed to be funny?

“Ladies and gentlemen of the opera world, it gives me the greatest pleasure to report that our first draft choice is Mario Lungbuster, lyric tenor from the Cincinnati Conservatory! Mr. Lungbuster, will you please come up here to the microphone so I can introduce you properly.”

Was there any point of this paragraph?

(Can you hear the audience cheering and shouting “Bravo! at the top of the operatic registers?)

No.

The announcer returns for a moment: “Mr. Jenkins! Mr. Jenkins! Will you please answer a few questions for our TV and radio audiences? You can? Good! OK. Here’s one from a woman in our audience. She wants to know why you selected Mario in the very first round — and can you afford to sign him to a contract?”

It sounds like this plan would make opera worse.

Mr. Jenkins: “Well, our regular tenor is still recovering from rib fractures suffered when he tried lifting the well-built soprano from the sofa in ‘La Traviata,’ and then a day later he really aggravated the injury when he fell off his horse in ‘Aida,’ but managed to finish the opera in great pain. We need a backup dramatic tenor.

“Mario is just the ticket. He’s short on experience, but he proved he knows how to go for the high notes without straining his, if you’ll pardon the expression, stomach muscles. Besides, he has well developed arm and back muscles so he’ll be able to hoist those overweight sopranos when they lean on him in the middle of a tearful aria. Oh, and to answer the second part of your question, we can afford to sign Mario to a long-term contract, but we may not have enough in the bank to pay for all his bills from his chiropractor.”

Wouldn’t anyone in a draft by necessity be short on experience? Also, Lou doesn’t seem to realize that this is a set of horrible jokes at the expense of made up people.

OK, enough already. In the same way, the symphony might use its No. 1 draft choice to replace its fumbling flutist with a Juilliard All-Star. Or, if you want to consider what the draft might do for theatrical companies, the Reportory Theater might gamble on a matinee idol who led the nation in free passes at the U.S.C. School of Drama.

Or they could pay a flutist or an actor on the market like they do now. There’s no advantage to this plan.

Say, you know something’ A culture draft might not be such a bad idea, at that, all jokes and hilarity aside. Just give me a minute, will you please? I have to make an important phone call. Dum-de dum-dum…. Hello, Seattle Opera? Would you please get me the boss, Mr. Speight Jenkins?

What hilarity? Is “Dum-de-dum-dum” the sound phones make in Guzzo’s world? Do the people answering the phones at the Seattle Opera need to be told the name of their artistic director? Like all Lou Guzzo pieces this left me with more questions than answers.

[Read more…]

– Transportation Action Agenda

– I’m glad to see the rest of the country realize that Cathy-McMorris-Rodgers is pretty awful.

– Bootstraps.

– Jay Inslee at Bike Works.

– If you only count the Catholics who vote for Rick Santorum, he has 100% of the Catholic vote.

– Mitt Romney is the Etch a Sketch candidate.

Yesterday a Molotov cocktail was thrown at the office door of a Texas state legislator. They haven’t caught the person who did it and it’s not known what the motive was. We do know that the legislator in question, Wendy Davis of Fort Worth, was a woman. She was pro choice and she was a Democrat.

Now we don’t know if this was an unhinged person or if it was political calculation (or both) and obviously people are responsible for their own actions. But these things happen within a larger context. And I hope the people fomenting hatred of women who gloated when Dr. Tiller was murdered will at least consider this as a reason to tamp down the rhetoric.

… An arrest was made late last night. So far everything above stands.

– Nothing like financial lectures from The Seattle Times.

– What Everyone Should Know About Trayvon Martin

– I missed the earthquake over the weekend.

– Who would want a tour of anything with Dick Morris?

– The let doctors lie bills are among the most awful of the horrible anti-abortion bills.

– National Council on Education for the Ceramic Arts means there will be exhibits throughout the area.

– The question on everyone’s mind.

Look, having 2 first district elections (one for the old seat from certification until the new seat is filled and one for the new) is a bit strange. But people can figure it out. Or as The Seattle Times implies: the dummies who vote will get all confused.

U.S. REP. Jay Inslee already has confounded 1st Congressional District voters by quitting his job, leaving constituents unrepresented in the months ahead. The Bainbridge Island Democrat leaves Congress this week to devote more time to running for governor.

Hey, remember when I said I thought the legacy media types who were always asking for Inslee to talk more about local issues would like that move? Whoops!

1st District residents would vote to fill the seat for December. Voters in the new 1st District would pick the two-year representative.

Bad idea. Too confusing for everyone.

You know how when an initiative that The Seattle Times agrees with passes they’re all about the will of the people will of the people will of the people? Those people will apparently be too confused by one election with Goodspaceguy and some people looking to get their name in the paper and one with the actual candidates. People on Bainbridge will apparently think they get two members of Congress now. Really, who cares?

– creatures that spread terrible diseases by sucking human blood or which eat the food out of poor children’s bellies are villains I’m happy to spend money against.

– One Bus Away is pretty rad.

– The Democrats need to stand for something.

– This Charles M. Blow piece on Trayvon Martin is just heartbreaking.

– This is super tacky.

– And God looked upon the penis, guns, trucks, bishops, and Republicans and said “It is good.”

I lean in favor of staggered closing times after 2:00, but I’m not strong. And a decent argument might turn me the other way. This editorial in The Seattle Times doesn’t make a decent argument. It’s annoying for 2 reasons. First, the argument itself.

RESEARCH suggests that focusing on crime hot spots can result in more efficient use of limited police resources. Bars that close at 2 a.m. are a prime example of predictable trouble zones.

The first sentence contradicts the second. You can’t focus on any particular hot spot if they all happen at the same time. Also, I love how research suggests it. No mention of any particular research and then the most bland statement in the world.

Closing time at bars is a knowable, manageable police concern, if the city is willing to bring its resources to bear at that time. Unfortunately, Seattle city leaders and members of the City Council have asked the state Liquor Control Board to consider allowing localities to extend hours. The goal is an enlivened nightlife and music scene and a desire to end the crunch of people leaving bars and causing street trouble at 2 a.m.

How about no? There is no need for longer drinking, more drinking or any other variation on the theme.

“How abut no” is a hell of an argument. Really, totally 100% made the case. There’s literally no counterargument. Well, except, “how about yes?”

They go on in this vein mostly as an excuse to attack McGinn. Whatever. We’ve all grown so used to that stale nonsense. You can find fresher dinosaur meat than you can find fresh ways for The Seattle Times to say they don’t like McGinn. But then there’s the other thing that pissed me off:

State lawmakers are poised to cut liquor-excise tax sharing. For Seattle, the reduction could be millions of dollars and would eventually ding the police budget.

As Councilmember Tim Burgess, who is open to studying longer hours, puts it: “The council won’t be motivated to extend bar hours, which likely will increase the demand for police services, when funds we use for police services are being withdrawn by the state.”

In other words, the city would be embarking on an experiment to extend bar hours while experiencing a reduction of state support for police. This was not a good idea before any state budget cut. It will be even less compelling afterward.

Then maybe fucking argue for a goddamn state budget that will allow local municipalities to keep that money. There’s an editorial today praising the Senate budget that will cut that money. If it’s a problem oppose the budget. If it’s going to mean there’s a public safety issue oppose the budget. Jesus.

Dear Third Avenue bus traffic during rush hour;

I had my doubts when I first started using you. I mean I never know how many people at my stop are buying drugs and how many are actually catching the bus. But damn, once I get on the bus, it’s so wonderful.

I love the dance the buses do when skipping a stop. When it works (and usually it does) it’s so seamless. I love that it’s not stuck with the cars in traffic. Despite myself, I love seeing cars pulled over for using it. It’s better than the other streets.

Don’t get me wrong, I know we’ve had our problems. When it rains hard the system seems to fall apart. I don’t know if that’s more people riding than normal or if it’s worse driving from bus drivers. I often take the tunnel even though it’s a less convenient stop.

Still when you’re working, you’re the best way to get North or South downtown.

Love,
Carl Ballard

I mentioned in Tuesday’s open thread that NARAL Pro-Choice Washington’s Chocolate for Choice is tonight. Even though Goldy isn’t one of the guest judges this time, I feel compelled to mention that it’s one of the best events of the year. Obviously, you support an important organization that has done so much to push for legislation for reproductive health in Washington State. In normal times this is important, but as states push more and more abortion — and even contraception — restrictions, it’s more important than ever.

But God knows we’ve all been to awful fundraisers for great organizations. This one isn’t one of them. You don’t sit through a bunch of boring speeches, at a table with people you don’t really know. Local chocolatiers donate chocolate that you can sample, and take home. There aren’t tables that you have to sit at, and while there will be some speechifying, it’s kept to a minimum every year I’ve been.

– Put them on the cover of Fortune and pretend they are role models.

– Dana Loesch, who is valiantly trying (and failing) to carry Breitbart’s torch, has done some digging into Sandra Fluke’s personal life because of course she has.

– Repairs to The Duwamish Trail.

– It will be tough to pivot from I hate Planned Parenthood to I look presidential.

– I’m glad someone in power is pushing back against the we’ve got to bomb Iran narrative. Kudos, Adam Smith.

– But at least none of the GOP presidential contenders have gone after the Girl Scouts yet.

– A clear victory for the concept of hate.

I’m actually somewhat sympathetic to the Seattle Times here. They moved Doonesbury from the comics page to the editorial page this week as it deals with the horrible new Texas abortion law. I think it was a mistake, but at least they’re still running it.

But Erica C. Barnett is right that once you start making decisions like that it opens you up to questioning why it gets made sometimes but not others.

However, despite the fact that today’s top local headline was about an 8-year-old girl who was accidentally shot by a classmate (the mother is being charged with third-degree assault) who brought a gun to school, the Times saw fit to run a comic strip today making light of gun violence (and, incidentally, drunkenness)

Sill, it might be too much to expect consistent standards from The Seattle Times.

I know I come across as a skeptical bastard on this blog. And often times with good reason. The fights get ugly, and people’s lives come to harm far to often as a result of poor decisions made in various city halls and county council chambers, in Olympia, and in DC. Yet for all of the problems, for all the bullshit, for all the fights and arguments, I love politics because they’re a way to improve people’s lives.

Really, we fight so hard because this matters. I mean holy shit, we get to help chose the president, and on and on down. We get to influence the direction of our country and our state. And critically, we get to complain when things don’t live up to our standards.

We get to complain about the people on the other side of the aisle. We get to complain that the people supposedly on our side far too often acting mealy mouthed and pathetic. We get to complain about the influence of money. We get to complain about the operatives on the other side and the apologists for mediocrity on our own side.

So if it looks like I’m buried in snark and in skepticism, well I probably am. But I’m also so glad to be able to have this platform. I really approach it joyfully.

– More GOP races today? I think Rick Santorum wins Alabama and Mississippi. Romney wins Hawaii and American Samoa. That means we’ll be up pretty late to hear his victory speech.

– I appreciate the intent behind these sort of bills to get us talking (and obviously, I’m linking to it here continuing the discussion) but surely there’s a better way to go than joke laws that would objectively be worse policy to object to actual laws that are terrible policy.

– Anyone going to the official reopening of the Burke-Gillman Trail?

– Anyone going to Chocolate for Choice?

ASFCME’s most important endorsement ever.

– If anyone needs me, I’ll be in the other room banging my head against the wall.

– Make Pullman a National Park

– Bus Driver Appreciation Day is coming up.

– A hell of an uptick in campaign spending.

– Occupy West Seattle protesting Chase tomorrow.

– Hug Gate goes all the way up to the Queen of England.

– The Huskies deserved a spot.