It starts right before the 2000’s with Blowjobgate. American Journalism balanced its coverage between a third Way neo-liberal who was horny and the anguished cries of Republicans who insisted horniness will destroy the Republic.
Neo-liberalism won in extra innings, although batshit had a good game.
Then American Journalism made fun of Love Story as seen on the Internet, balancing coverage precisely halfway between neo-liberalism and batshit insane.
Batshit won in exra innings, with the help of the home plate umpire. American Journalism decided to go see what the sharks were eating.
Then came a Pearl Harbor of our Lifetimes. To deal with the Evil Empire of our Lifetimes, we needed Saddam to Suck On Something. Coverage was balanced between Third-Way hawk viewpoints and those who argued that French Fries were the problem. American Journalism sort of missed the millions of people marching around going “this is a big mistake,” although they did occasionally find time to make fun of them.
Completely batshit won in a blowout, and in an exhibition match, a brain dead woman smiled at everyone. American Journalism was content.
After the Big Mistake, there were even bigger mistakes and shocking brutality. American Journalism started to look into it all, but then a Federalist Society member who just happened to be familiar with late 20th-Century typewriter font kerning was watching TV one night. American Journalism cowered before the power of kerning, fearing for itself.
Coverage of shocking brutality was balanced between a few gasps and calls for more shocking brutality, including against American Journalists.
Batshit won again.
Meanwhile, the Great Recession was happening. American Journalism did not balance its coverage about this because it missed the story altogether.
American Journalism gnashed her teeth and smiled at everyone who was still around. She would get the story right this time, by packaging it better and using Twitter.