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HA Bible Study: Song of Solomon 4:5-6

by Goldy — Sunday, 8/2/15, 6:00 am

Song of Solomon 4:5-6
Your breasts are perfect;
they are twin deer
feeding among lilies.
I will hasten to those hills
sprinkled with sweet perfume
and stay there till sunrise.

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  1. 1

    Ima Dunce spews:

    Sunday, 8/2/15 at 7:09 am

    Somebody’s going to get a pearl necklace.

  2. 2

    Daniel Robinson spews:

    Sunday, 8/2/15 at 7:10 am

    ‘Twas a boring night, listing to the Reverend Arthur R. Pyke, and I started paging through my KJV Bible. In school, I would read ahead, no matter the class, because school was a bore. I found Song of Solomon and was never the same again.

    Oh, sweet tumescence, where is thy sting?

    I got the boner to end all boners, sitting right there in the pew. I had to shift around a lot to get comfortable and to hide it. Church isn’t made for trying to surreptitiously hide a hormonally addled pubescent boy natural reaction to reading about breasts.

    After I calmed down, I read, in my KJV Bible, with notations, how this was an allegory for Christ and his Church. And in my days before I had an epiphany of skepticism, I wondered, “Christ wants to have sex with the Church?”

    But after that, when I was bored in church, I always had something that would re-interest me in the Bible and church.

    Heh.

  3. 3

    Willy Vomit spews:

    Sunday, 8/2/15 at 8:11 am

    This is just a modern translation of an old version of “Dear Penthouse”.

    The Wholly Babble is full of little moments like this. The original versions and meanings have almost entirely been lost to time. The document has been re-written and edited so many times that the original meaning is entirely lost. This little section is mostly likely something that the Conservatives cannot deal with in psychological terms at all. It makes them feel funny and dirty in their places-that-polite-people-don’t-ever-talk-about.

    In practically every generation, the Conservatives have always re-written the Babble to suit the agenda according to the “correct” political paradigm of the moment. Hell, Nazi Germany had their own, State-approved version.

    So, any poem, parable or that is contained in the modern Babble is suspect as to its provenance.

  4. 4

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    Sunday, 8/2/15 at 8:23 am

    You humans are a strange species. You’ve had a breast fetish ever since you evolved. Other mammals see tits as just a food source.

  5. 5

    Daniel Robinson spews:

    Sunday, 8/2/15 at 10:19 am

    @4

    It is a matter of comprehension and value. Other species would look at a Jackson Pollock painting and ask, “Did someone throw up?”

    Some other species will also kill off young which seem to have a failure to thrive. Sometimes they eat them.

    Some species live with only a brain stem. Some humans live as if they have only a brain stem, but that is another rant.

  6. 6

    LucasFoxx spews:

    Sunday, 8/2/15 at 10:28 am

    Dear Solomon,

    I never believed your songs until one night this happened.

    She was a fast machine she kept her motor clean
    She was the best damn woman that I ever seen
    She had the sightless eyes telling me no lies
    Knocking me out with those American thighs….

  7. 7

    LucasFoxx spews:

    Sunday, 8/2/15 at 10:41 am

    Donald Trump, on Face the Jonathan Karl, was a treasure trove of derp, “sprinkled with sweet perfume”.

    He says, Obama is so bad there won’t be another black President for generations. And he’ll water-board some people. He doesn’t know who, yet, but he will.

    Bernie took the high road when Karl baited him against Hillary. “I will not get into personal attacks.” So, … interview over. Feel the Bern, Karl.

  8. 8

    LucasFoxx spews:

    Sunday, 8/2/15 at 10:52 am

    I’m sorry, that was “This (is) Weak” with Jonathan Karl.

  9. 9

    LucasFoxx spews:

    Sunday, 8/2/15 at 11:05 am

    “Your breasts are perfect”

    Speaking of perfect boobs, The Donald seems to be everywhere, this morning, explaining how the Great Negotiator is not such a great debater.

  10. 10

    LucasFoxx spews:

    Sunday, 8/2/15 at 1:40 pm

    Huckleboob Fin on Face a Nation’s Capable Host: John Dickerson: “has a debate ever been won using a nazi analogy?” Huck: “I don’t know if it has…(higgeryjiggery) Iran wants to kill Israel (buggerynuttery) It’s a money deal (projectionerectionry) It’s a sad state of affairs when we put money in front of the will of the people.”

    “Those of us who have stuck our necks on the line to run for President…”

    “I will hasten to those hills
    sprinkled with sweet perfume
    and stay there till sunrise.”

  11. 11

    Mark Adams spews:

    Sunday, 8/2/15 at 5:58 pm

    @2 Well they also leave out the little fact that the Song of Solomon is influenced by Greek culture. Clearly Solomon is talking about a woman here with some great breasts and he’s a man who likes sex and to get laid, and apparently did so frequently. He certainly didn’t give two figs about the church or Christ since he’s built the 2nd temple has a huge harem and life is very good. As Mel Brooks says it’s good to be the King. So be blunt with your Christian and particularly Fundamentalist friends and state right out this passage and a lot of the Song of Solomon is about fucking and that is all it’s about. The best come back they can come back with is god likes fucking, after all rabbits do it. So maybe the Hippies have it right. I think most Jewish people interpret the book somewhere along the lines I’ve suggested. Just they haven’t been able to give it the same sass and frankness to seriously challenge the Kuma Sutra’s as the ancient world’s best sex handbook for novices, beginners and the experienced. Now if we can just get some politicians to pick it as their summer reading we can enjoy a bit more quiet with less noisy steam., but the Donald is entertaining. Is the Trump brand going up in the stock market?

  12. 12

    Mark Adams spews:

    Sunday, 8/2/15 at 6:01 pm

    Maybe next time creationists insist that Creationism be taught in our high schools that teachers teaching biology and sex ed insist on using the Song of Solomon in class.

  13. 13

    LucasFoxx spews:

    Sunday, 8/2/15 at 10:26 pm

    I learn so much from the comments around here.

    “I will hasten to those hills
    sprinkled with sweet perfume
    and stay there till sunrise.”

    “(Then) Like a bat out of hell I’ll be gone when the morning comes.
    When the night is over, like a bat out of hell, I’ll be gone, gone, gone.
    Like a bat out of hell I’ll be gone when the morning comes.
    But when the day is done
    And the sun goes down
    And the moonlight’s shining through.
    Then like a sinner before the gates of Heaven
    I’ll come crawling on back to you.”

  14. 14

    Ima Dunce spews:

    Monday, 8/3/15 at 7:34 am

    @4 I’m sure running around naked standing up for hundreds of thousands of years gave us plenty of time to focus on features that “stood” out.

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