Genesis 1:24-28
And God said, Let the earth bring forth the living creature after his kind, cattle, and creeping thing, and beast of the earth after his kind: and it was so.And God made the beast of the earth after his kind, and cattle after their kind, and every thing that creepeth upon the earth after his kind: and God saw that it was good.
And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth.
So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.
And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.
Genesis 2:7-22
And the LORD God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul.[…] And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.
And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof.
And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.
And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;
And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.
Discuss.
Was God a Caveman? Why the fuck does he talk that way? Is this where Puffy learned to talk?
God giveth haveth and taketh away.
The last verse? Sounds like God was accepting of gender reassignment.
I have always wondered about that rib that God created in Adam and then had to take from him to make Eve.
1) Did God forget how to make ribs after Adam so he had to borrow one?
2) What did Adam look like with that extra rib?
3) Was it a single rib?
4) Was it one from each side?
5) Was it a a whole set, like one side of Adam’s body? What the hell did that look like?
6) Was it actually a penile bone that was taken (most mammal males have a penile bone)?
7) Did God create the McRib?
Just spent some time googling the number of ribs in mammals and came upon stories of people in college biology classes who believe that men and women have a different number of ribs. This is a good one http://discovermagazine.com/1995/sep/darwinsrib561
I think it would be a way better story if the LORD! created dinosaurs in his image. Then Adam and Short Ribs Eve could ride into the sunset on T-Rex firing six shooters at gubermint revnuers.
Full of typos. Obviously the Supreme Being was talking about rabbits when She spoke of “be fruitful and multiply.” Somehow “Great Mother Rabbit Spirit” got changed to “God” and “rabbits” got changed to “man” at some stage of copying the holy texts. Monastic scribes probably did it in the Middle Ages, during the changeover from scrolls to books.
Actually there are at least 4 dueling creation myths here. A third is when Cain is marked and goes out into the big wide world and somehow finds a wife among the human beings who are already out there and could take vengeance on him. Then Genesis 6:2 with the Sons of God enjoying the passion of the daughters of man. Creating giants ect. Then there is after the flood. Wouldn’t god have gotten out his creation stuff and started all over to recreate at least plants. No to mention that the inhabitants of the ark certainly would not have had enough food to last 3 months which is the slimmest of growing seasons.
And don’t forget the first chapter of John which I suppose cold be creation myth for Christians who are free of the Old Testament.
@4 I don’t know it seems unlikely that those monks who kept the bible in Latin for a very long time would mix up cuniculaus with homo hominis. Am I detecting some inter species jealousy here Mr. Rabbit if so I’m sorry but we humans have dominion after all this god fellow says so. I know we should be taking better care of it but I don’t where you can take your complaint. Particularly if you are the pygmy type rabbit that are native around here since you all hide so well, and are difficult to see out the governors mansion windows should you be doing rabbit stuff out on the lawn. Even it it’s an intricate ceremony to the great rabbit spirit we humans just may not make the connection. We can be such blind creatures.
Interestingly the Magna Carta’s birthday just went past and it was originally written in Latin and then translated into French and only as an afterthought translated into English. Did the Great Mother Rabbit perhaps influence this? Did the Great Mother Rabbit prefer the English commons to the French or Latin alternatives?
It’s all crap.
@6 “we humans have dominion”
That may be more temporary than you stupid humans realize.
@8 The idea that humans have “superior intelligence” and are therefore likely to survive by adapting is, to me, laughable. With billions of years of evolution, you have only one species with our abilities, showing a unique predilection to foul our own nest, and that is “superior”? It would seem pretty obvious that living things that are in harmony with the planet are the survivors. We have dominion over nothing. Not even ourselves.
@8 Well the Earth could be in the way of some intergalactic highway project or a giant drilling machine. I’m sure the dolphins will say thanks for all the fish.
Poor dinosaurs and saber toothed tigers, and some weird planetary ooze of one celled organisms that may have invented multi cellular so they could get around they all had dominion once.
Unfortunately I do have a fondness for rabbit stew. Particularly if cold and hungry in the woods whether or not I’m naked and afraid. Still rabbits get away fairly frequently. Too frequently and the lynx and her cubs go hungry now we wouldn’t want that now would Mr. Rabbit. So go ahead and fatten up and be part of the whole circle of life. I know that is not particularly a Jewish or Christian concept but maybe part of the Mother Goddesses concept, perhaps she had some influence on the book of Job.
@9 How nihilistic of you. Then again humans did survive the last ice age and perhaps edged out or took an active part in making sure we were the only homo to make it off the plains of Africa. So far under the rules of biology we are not doing too bad, and we have even been about to break some of the typical rules. What would be success though. As long as we pass our genes down we are being successful unless replaced by a superior creature, perhaps rabbits are. Still is success remaining alive as a species upon this planet for a few million years (this would be success biologically) ultimately life is going to have a hard time going on this planet. Is success getting off Earth and out into the solar system creating colonies we can survive. Is ultimate success reaching another inhabitable world that our species can survive on for millions or a billion years.
Still your pessimism is not entirely misplaced, but we are human beings and there are possibilities we can continue being the dominant beings on this planet (though the lowly bacteria and one celled life forms are the dominant life form) with pluck and hope.
@11 Nihilistic? Humans are killing all the animals. We are in the midst of one of the greatest extinction events in the history of life on earth and we are the cause! Some pluck!
A bit of historic context in a nutshell: The Genesis 1 creation story is actually several centuries newer, composed during the Babylonian exile of the 6th century BC when the final draft of what we now know as the Pentateuch (or Torah) was assembled. The Genesis 2 story featuring Adam and Eve was written in the 9th century BC by a source known to scholars as “J” (for the source’s use of “Jahweh” (or, in English, Yahweh) rather than Elohim as the proper name for God). J also compiled the already-existing oral legends of Abraham, Noah, Joseph, and Moses (among others) into the form we know today. Prominent literary critic Harold Bloom argues that J was a highly educated woman, possibly a member of King Solomon’s court, because the female characters in J’s work are consistently much more developed and interesting than the male ones (see his “The Book of J” for details).
@13, thank you for inserting a little biblical scholarship, not that anyone will take it seriously as our primarily Christian culture doesn’t care about anything real happening before 1 CE.
@13 & 14…
I’ll jump on with Ms. Kinney.
Thanks MarciaX for the informative comment.
That the creation of all the texts is of such a diverse nature makes the documents much more interesting.
@12 Well Corgi’s seem to be doing pretty well. And cattle are big winners. Once the bird flu runs its course there will be millions or billons of chickens and turkeys.
The problem is that the majority of Americans believe in the bibles version of creation, even with at least two creation myths in the first chapters that fact is swept under the table. Adam and Even and dominion reign supreme. Only about 20 percent of Americans (Democrats, Republicans, INdependents) believe in evolution that independent of a god. That gives us a basis to crap in our nest because God will clean it up. The mere fact the Darwin pointed out that extinction can happen and God does not come down and recreate the DoeDoe bird or any other creature that goes extinct. So the majority of Americans think they are special. Only about 200 out of over 100,000 life and Earth scientists believe in creationism but those 700 get much a disproportional amount of media attention and lots of book sales, and appearances on Coast to Coast. I know it’s amazing that the host who believes in big foot and aliens believes in creationism and can’t understand how evolution works and that the hand of go must shepherd mans being here on this Earth.