Ezekiel 23:8
She did not give up the prostitution she began in Egypt, when during her youth men slept with her, caressed her virgin bosom and poured out their lust on her.
Discuss.
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Is Judea the Stranger?
This is amongst the Prophet Gold’s greatest literary sayings.
First, HA was down this AM, then he posts a citation form Ezekiel about a woman who began as a whore in Egypt … an obvious allegorical reference to the Prophets time with Tim Eyman. Then the whore moves to Judea where the practice of her trade has a different meaning?
The double entendre here goes further. If what was whoredome in Egypt became prophecy, then has the time come for Seattle to legalize prostitution?
Seattle style, this would not mean just recognizing the Stranger is entitles to advertise the trade or that Aurora is a synonym for Sodom and Gomorrah. Just as the Prophet learned in moving to a legitimate newspaper, he is telling us that Seattle should celebrate its prostitutes.
As the Deity, I endorse the Stranger’s new program to promote paid love:
1. Hotels that do not want to permit paid fornication should be required to have signs saying that they permit sex between unmarried people. Unmarried sex in any hotel without a sign would incur fines of $1000 per act against the hotel. Fees would be paid to the Seattle Office of Urban Trades.
2. Professional love providers, like taxi drivers, will be given medallions. These medallions will be auctioned annually by the city. Employees of medallion owners would be required to have annual exam9inations to assure they they have appropriate technical skills. Quarterly inspections for health would also be required. Fees would be paid to the Seattle Office of Urban Trades.
3. Fees from the Seattle Office of Urban Trades would be used to decrease rental monthly fees in podment hotels. .
4. Podment Hotels would be required to provide at least bedroom in each podment complex large enough to hold a queen sized bed and to set off at least 5% of their podment to be licensed for use by the Seattle Office of Urban Trades.
“when during her youth men slept with her, caressed her virgin bosom and poured out their lust on her.”
And until somebody had a flash of inspiration while while making lamb sausage, that was the best they could do for birth control. It was sort of messy, but quite effective.
Anybody who can take the above Scripture quote, relate it to the neuro-skeletal consequences of tertiary syphilis, and then make a joke centered (well not quite, anyway) on a Bangles song has my unbounded admiration, as long as they can stay within the bounds of good taste, of course.
Back in the days of the Sphinx,
The Egyptians all had a few kinks.
They poured out their lust
While Pharoah said ‘tut-tut’
In a condo of stone-ah, I think.
Is Judea the Stranger?
This is amongst the Prophet Gold’s greatest literary sayings.
Then he posts a citation form Ezekiel about a woman who began as a whore in Egypt … an obvious allegorical reference to the Prophets time with Tim Eyman. Then the whore moves to Judea where the practice of her trade has a different meaning?
The double entendre here goes further. If what was whoredome in Egypt became prophecy, then has the time come for Seattle to legalize prostitution?
Seattle style, this would not mean just recognizing the Stranger is entitles to advertise the trade or that Aurora is a synonym for Sodom and Gomorrah. Just as the Prophet learned in moving to a legitimate newspaper, he is telling us that Seattle should celebrate its prostitutes.
As the Deity, I endorse the Stranger’s new program to promote paid love:
1. Hotels that do not want to permit paid fornication should be required to have signs saying that they permit sex between unmarried people. Unmarried sex in any hotel without a sign would incur fines of $1000 per act against the hotel. Fees would be paid to the Seattle Office of Urban Trades.
2. Professional love providers, like taxi drivers, will be given medallions. These medallions will be auctioned annually by the city. Employees of medallion owners would be required to have annual exam9inations to assure they they have appropriate technical skills. Quarterly inspections for health would also be required. Fees would be paid to the Seattle Office of Urban Trades.
3. Fees from the Seattle Office of Urban Trades would be used to decrease rental monthly fees in podment hotels. .
4. Podment Hotels would be required to provide at least bedroom in each podment complex large enough to hold a queen sized bed and to set off at least 5% of their podment to be licensed for use by the Seattle Office of Urban Trades.
“when during her youth men slept with her, caressed her virgin bosom and poured out their lust on her.”
And people say adolescence has significantly changed from ancient times? So all that “Walking like an Egyptian” was nothing but a dry hump?
Don’t get me wrong, I understand that the song was actually a delightfully subversive, but uncompromising, text dealing with the way women contort their own bodies to conform to societal and hierarchical expectations.
“Quarterly inspections for health would also be required”
That’s absurd. Do the entire person in one visit.
A bit of the pot calling the kettle black on that one…
@ 7
More like the Ho calling the Shovel a rusty son of a bitch.
@7, 8
Any bets that KRUSTY TED is a paid KOCH HO?
@9 Well, if he’s doing it for free he’s a Koch sucker.
Am I the only person (besides “God”, but what do you expect from Him?) who want to have a serious discussion of the meaning of this Scripture passage?
Or are you the people who only passed Scripture Knowledge tests (gaining enough yaller tickets to procure a Dore Bible) by dint of a list of “begats” inscribed on your shirt-cuffs?
mooser: how ‘serious’ is it actually possible to be about bukkake in the Bible? (read from 23:8 to 23:20. contemplate horses and donkeys).
but – in context, it’s just another example of how the OT tribes were so fanatically extremist that people kept on bailing on them for other, nicer cultures. Their sex-negativity is especially on display in this example. And no, I don’t BELIEVE the women did what the OT accuses them of, any more than I believe MODERN fundamentalists when when they attempt to describe the sex lives of classic rockers and their groupies.
Ezekiel 23:9
Therefore I delivered her into the hands of her lovers, the Assyrians, for whom she lusted.
10 They stripped her naked, took away her sons and daughters and killed her with the sword. She became a byword among women, and punishment was inflicted on her.
11 “Her sister Oholibah saw this, yet in her lust and prostitution she was more depraved than her sister.
12 She too lusted after the Assyrians—governors and commanders, warriors in full dress, mounted horsemen, all handsome young men.
13 I saw that she too defiled herself; both of them went the same way.
14 “But she carried her prostitution still further. She saw men portrayed on a wall, figures of Chaldeans portrayed in red,
15 with belts around their waists and flowing turbans on their heads; all of them looked like Babylonian chariot officers, natives of Chaldea.
16 As soon as she saw them, she lusted after them and sent messengers to them in Chaldea.
17 Then the Babylonians came to her, to the bed of love, and in their lust they defiled her. After she had been defiled by them, she turned away from them in disgust.
18 When she carried on her prostitution openly and exposed her naked body, I turned away from her in disgust, just as I had turned away from her sister.
19 Yet she became more and more promiscuous as she recalled the days of her youth, when she was a prostitute in Egypt.
20 There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.
21 So you longed for the lewdness of your youth, when in Egypt your bosom was caressed and your young breasts fondled.
22 “Therefore, Oholibah, this is what the Sovereign Lord says: I will stir up your lovers against you, those you turned away from in disgust, and I will bring them against you from every side—
23 the Babylonians and all the Chaldeans, the men of Pekod and Shoa and Koa, and all the Assyrians with them, handsome young men, all of them governors and commanders, chariot officers and men of high rank, all mounted on horses.
24 They will come against you with weapons, chariots and wagons and with a throng of people; they will take up positions against you on every side with large and small shields and with helmets. I will turn you over to them for punishment, and they will punish you according to their standards.
25 I will direct my jealous anger against you, and they will deal with you in fury. They will cut off your noses and your ears, and those of you who are left will fall by the sword. They will take away your sons and daughters, and those of you who are left will be consumed by fire.
26 They will also strip you of your clothes and take your fine jewelry.
27 So I will put a stop to the lewdness and prostitution you began in Egypt. You will not look on these things with longing or remember Egypt anymore.