1 Samuel 18:25-27
“Say to David, ‘The king wants no other price for the bride than a hundred Philistine foreskins, to take revenge on his enemies.’” Saul’s plan was to have David fall by the hands of the Philistines.When the attendants told David these things, he was pleased to become the king’s son-in-law. So before the allotted time elapsed, David took his men with him and went out and killed two hundred Philistines and brought back their foreskins. They counted out the full number to the king so that David might become the king’s son-in-law. Then Saul gave him his daughter Michal in marriage.
Discuss.
Samuel, Saul, David, Peter, Paul, etc., etc…….sounds like the Real Housewives of Bethlehem, give me a fucking break.
LONG LIVE IRELAND – REAL HOME OF THE FREE AND THE BRAVE
http://www.fokai.tv/fxv/wp-con...../image.jpg
Did you hear the one about Mohammed’s grandson? He got a job with the circus circumcising elephants. The pay wasn’t much, but the tips were big!
So they made a wallet. Or was it a briefcase? I think I blew the punchline. “Back up I don’t know how big it gets?”
History is a complicated thing. What is accepted as fact could be a myth, rumor, propaganda lies, misunderstandings, revenge, etc.
Michal? Is that Michael like Michael Learned, or Michelle like Michelle Obama? It’s a messed up, half-assed neither one thing nor the other sort of name. I wouldn’t cut off five foreskins to marry someone with a name like that.
Why do you stupid humans go to so much trouble to get married? You should learn from rabbits. Just mate and be done with it.
@2 Get the fuck outta here. That one is 2 million years old. You’re a phony anyway, just like Drumpf.
@6 Just mate and be done with it.
I think that is the primary human activity already.
@5 Well you have to remember as the kings daughter she comes with huge tracts of land. So how about some terrible peril, maybe a little peril. If not are you gay?
@6 And Mrs Rabbit’s opinion on that is?
@7 Can’t be that old after all God’s last prophet only lived 1385 years ago. Not that David lived 2 million yeas ago, and there are those bible thumpers who insist the world has only been around for like 6500 years.
Not that the elephants appreciate being circumcised, would seem to be a dangerous job that one might not survive the first one let along 200. Hey do African poachers take the foreskin along with the tusks? Is this terrible joke contributing to the extinction of these gentle giants? They are just huge rabbits right RR?
@7 You are just jealous it was not rabbit foreskins that Saul asked for, or that Mohammed’s grandson wasn’t collecting at the circus. Yep lot of great circus acts with rabbits in them. Or is that to keep the tigers, lions, and bears fed, and/or the performers. No waste with rabbits in the circus though, they can’t perform they are served up. That’s harsh no wonder Bugs Bunny is so funny.
Then there is David hanging out with the Philistines later in the same chapter. They were good mercenaries against Saul. So peace in the middle east is possible.
7 – You’re the biggest phony on the planet rodent. You actually think you’re important. You’re just a fucking prey animal for coyotes, wild cats and foxes.
@15:40 the true religious event of America began! Who will win the Superbowl the pinnacle of professional football!!!
@7 Actually you should point out that it’s Mrs. Rabbit who should be on here as she is the matriarch of the burrow. She is the one in control. Also rabbits can be monogamous., Domestic rabbits are nearly always monogamous. Wild rabbits can be either but often are monogamous though in larger groups rabbits can be more polyamorous. Though the head female seems to be attached more to the burrow, and may not be above twiddling though it does seem to a case where she will stay with one male, but should he die or disappear for awhile will invite another male in. Also female rabbits unlike humans don’t experience menopause. Being social animals this may mean the theory that human females go through menopause because humans are social animals has a major flaw.
@3 Guess it depends though you could ask female elephants who will probably tell you male elephants lie about size all the time.
As I mentioned in a post a few weeks ago, my boy Muhammed first tried to sell his act to the local Jews, but they recognized a con artist when they saw one and sent him packing.
So, he just invented Islam as a religion to advance his ego, But a strange thing happened: he kept this crazy preoccupation with foreskins and made cutting them off one of the tenets of his newly invented religion.
Personally, I don’t care if Jews and Muslims want to bob their baby boys’ phalluses, but it sure as hell ain’t gonna get them into Heaven. I say just leave your childrens’ genitals alone. They are perfect exactly as I made them.
If only we had more stuff like this in the Bible. British Bobbies should have prevented this David fellow from acquiring all those foreskins.
“[last lines]
King Arthur: [Arthur and Bedevere have found out that the Holy Grail is in Castle Augh, which is guarded by the frenchmen] We shall attack at once.
Sir Bedevere: Yes, my liege.
[an army of hundreds of soldiers appears]
King Arthur: [to Castle Augh] French persons, today the blood of many a brave knight shall be avenged! In the name of God, we shall not stop our fight till every one of you lies dead, and the Holy Grail returns to those who God Himself has chosen!
[turns to army]
King Arthur: Charge!
[the army charges forward, but is stopped by the police and the historian’s wife]
Historian’s Wife: [points to Arthur] It’s that one, I’m sure!
[the police arrest Arthur and Bedevere]
Policeman: [turns to cameraman] All right, sonny, that’s enough, just take off.
[turns off camera]
”
Monty Python and the Holy Grail – 1975
I say let Drumpf be President for an eternity if it’s going to mean people coming together.
#weaccept
@1 Come on Allah you bob sheep tails. Sniping the foreskin is totally different. Get your facts straight so RR doesn’t get on you about misspeaking. He’s all upset because some Trump official said something about a Bowling Green massacre. Other than the one involving your giant hog no such massacre. The proper phrase is circumcision.
So umm who is going to win todays Superbowl, I still got time to make a bet, I know you frown on gambling too, still what is the spread going to be? This is all about jihad and struggle after all so you gotta have an angle in the game.
@20 You mean that? Really or is it only for the Irish people coming together. So free and so brave they are.
And the British Parliament is so brave voting in support of Brexit. Showing the same kind of valor as was shown at the Somme. One hopes for a better outcome. Though it could ultimately lead to another Somme for them. Wonder how they can help us lead NATO if they are not in the EU. So brave!!!
@22 you could always move to Russia with Drumpf.
LONG LIVE IRELAND – REAL HOME OF THE FREE AND THE BRAVE
You don’t like my Free speech but you love Drumpf talking about how bad we are like Russia. Please, you sideways talker.
https://www.google.com/amp/www.cbsnews.com/amp/news/mike-pence-chris-christie-defend-president-trumps-russia-comments/?client=safari
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix.....986569.jpg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KUoJ6ygwDhw&sns=em
I always wondered why my mom & dad had the end of my dick cut off but was too polite to ask.