For the Birds

In Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa We’re Doomed news there are radioactive birds at Hanford (Tri-City Herald, I think they have a limited number of clicks):

Work stopped Wednesday morning at parts of the Hanford vitrification plant after radioactive contamination was detected under a bird’s nest, according to Bechtel National.

I know where this leads: Soon they’ll bite people and then those people will have super powers. Like shitting on people from 100 feet up. I’m already terrified. The only question now is if they use their super powers for good or evil. Probably evil because how you could possibly use that power for good?

Or maybe I’m exaggerating just a bit.

The contamination is suspected of coming from mud used for the nest, which may have belonged to a swallow, said Bechtel spokesman Todd Nelson. Only a small amount of contaminated soil was found, and the contamination was at a low level.

Comments

  1. 1

    Michael spews:

    I know where this leads: Soon they’ll bite people and then those people will have super powers. Like shitting on people from 100 feet up.

    Dude, I want that superpower.

  2. 2

    Liberal Scientist is a Dirty Fucking Socialist Hippie spews:

    @1

    Yup, me too!

    Who would you hit first?

    Tim Eyman and Rodney Tom come to mind.

  3. 3

    SJ spews:

    Isn’t the implication obvious?

    Cats kill birds BUT the cats do not eat birds.

    So we need a LOT MORE cats to kill off the super birds.

  4. 4

    Michael spews:

    @3
    My cat eats birds, but rather than digest them she pukes them back up on my kitchen floor. I do not wish to have radioactive cat puke on my kitchen floor.

    @2 Puddy! ;->

  5. 6

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @5 Spud, I knew there was something strange about you, and I finally figured it out — you glow in the dark. Or does the dark glow in you?