America will never elect John McCain

…because he has little T-Rex arms.


T-Rex arms, with bloaty, pasty sun-damaged skin. A sure thing, America!


  1. 2

    Jeff spews:

    Will, before you poke fun at John McCain’s body, maybe you should subject your own body to five years of torture and neglect in a North Vietnamese prison – preceded, incidentally, by ejecting yourself from a burning fighter jet, breaking both arms and one leg in the process. Then we’ll see how “electable” you think your body makes you. What a disgusting thing to say about McCain, of all people. You should be ashamed.

  2. 3

    bma spews:

    So, if you were a Republican, would you have said that Illinois 6th District voters shouldn’t have voted for Tammy Duckworth because she was too short, asshole?

    Dude, grow the *fuck* up.

  3. 5

    Another TJ spews:

    John McCain is loathsome for many reasons (dishonesty, corruption, “anger management issues,” naivete on both foreign and domestic policy, etc.), but he gets a complete and unconditional pass from me for the condition of his body. They didn’t have a fitness center at the Hanoi Hilton.

    Now, if you want to hit him for his creepy laugh, knock yourself out.

  4. 6


    Will is just jealous because even in his wet dreams he’ll never look even 1/4 that good. He has that deer in the headlights look that comes from riding too much public transit coupled with the combination anorexic/Value Village look that committed leftists get when they take living green too literally.

    Dude, when the pork and beans in your fridge grows its own mold, it’s time to compost the sucker not eat it for the anti-biotic value of the mold to ward off whatever social disease you suffer from at the moment.

    But I’ll beat that even as old as he is, John McCain could still whup your butt with energy to spare. Hell, I’ll bet Michael Jackson could whup your butt with energy to spare!

    The Piper

  5. 7

    sempersimper spews:

    Oh, my. Listen to all the Republican outrage.

    Do you remember Cleland?

    I didn’t think so.

  6. 8

    Mr. Cynical spews:

    will you bubbleheaded LEFTIST PINHEADED KLOWN!
    Is this the new approach of the Seattle New Age Progressives?
    When you can’t attack McCain on his performance…comment on his arm length.

    Is that all the better you can do shitferbrains?

  7. 9

    ArtFart spews:

    What the hell, none of us looks as good as we used to.

    The guy’s bod may have a few miles on it, but apparently Cindy doesn’t have a problem with it.

    Think about it.

  8. 10

    bma spews:

    @7: I’m hardly a Republican, but invoking Cleland as an excuse for piss-poor partisan behavior is pathetic. It’s wrong either way.

  9. 11

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    There also seems to be a legal question of whether he’s eligible to be president as he was born in a foreign country and therefore may not meet the constitutional requirement of being a “natural born citizen.”

  10. 12

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @2 I wonder how many other pilots who ejected from burning aircraft over North Vietnam broke 3 of their 4 limbs in the process. Don’t they give Navy pilots classes on how to eject? Did McCain sleep through that class? He sure as hell didn’t know how to fly. He had to beg for a combat assignment because they assigned him to training duties after he crashed two expensive Navy jets, which is two more than most Navy pilots lose in their entire careers. Still, he was less destructive than his grandfather, who wrecked 5 planes during his flying career. The McCain family’s total score is 8 taxpayer-owned aircraft destroyed. We can’t afford to employ the McCains in the Navy; we should find paper-pushing jobs for them in some quiet bureaucracy where they can’t cause too much damage.

  11. 13

    Tlazolteotl spews:

    If I lived in Oregon, I would definitely be voting for Steve Novick, even though he’s only 4’9″! In fact, he makes me wish I lived in Orgeon, just so I could vote for him!

  12. 14

    Mark Centz spews:

    Really, Will, this is wingnut humor. I’d expect to see something like this at Free Republic, not here. And, sempersimper, 2 wrongs /= right.

    Roger Rabbit, we won’t make friends in the armed services if we tell those serving abroad under orders that their children can’t grow up to be President.

  13. 15

    Tlazolteotl spews:

    @9: Don’t be so sure that Cindy doesn’t have problems with that. After all, she did steal drugs from her own charity to help dull the pain, hain, ain……

  14. 16

    rhp6033 spews:

    RR @ 11: McCain can serve as President because he is a “natural born” citizen of the U.S. Both his parents were citizens, and he was born on U.S. Territory at the time (the Panama Canal Zone).

    But there are so many other reasons not to elect him….

  15. 17

    rhp6033 spews:

    The main reason McCain shouldn’t be elected? Because he will have veto power. That means the Democrats will need 2/3 of the House and Senate in order to make any changes to the status quo. In other words, if you are happy with having the Republicans to continue to screw up the country the way they have for the past seven years, then elect McCain. Otherwise, elect somebody else.

  16. 18

    ratcityreprobate spews:

    @6 Piper
    Good work this morning in Crosscut. You got a lively discussion going which doesn’t happen very often over there. Lots to disagree with you about of course but nothing new about that.

  17. 19

    rhp6033 spews:

    The second best reason not to elect McCain is because he will continue Republican control of the Dept. of Justice, which has already been completely politicized under Bush & Rove. If you want the government to continue politically motivated prosecutions designed for maximum effect during election years, then McCain’s your man. If not, then vote for a Democrat.

  18. 20

    rhp6033 spews:

    The third reason not to vote for McCain is that he would continue Republican control of the appointment of Federal judges (including Supreme Court justices). As Bush & Rove showed, the primary qualification for a judge under a Republcan administration is the faithful delivery of elections to the Republican Party. If you don’t agree with that, then vote for a Democrat.

  19. 21

    dutch spews:

    11. Roger, go back to sleep…this is a non issue brought up by people who don’t know shinnola. The official term is “citizen born abroad”, happens all the time when either the parents are abroad (but are American Citizens) or when one parent is US Citizen and the other is not (at which case it requires a registration with a US consulat or embassy within the first 2 weeks). At that point, the baby is a natural born US Citizen…which means…born as a us citizen, not born as a citizen of another nation and then naturalized. What many people seem to get stuck on is that they think the child has to be born on US Soil (oh, US military installations have in the past been considered US soil and Embassies are always considered US soil).

    McCain’s birthplace is not an issue. Just imagine Obama would be 3 or 4 years older….according to your assumption, he couldn’t run either as Hawaii was not a state before 1959.

  20. 22

    rhp6033 spews:

    Physical appearance is the very least of any reasons not to vote for McCain.

    But that didn’t stop the Republicans from bragging that Romney “looked presidential”, and making a lot of unflattering comments about Hillary Clinton’s appearance. Under those circumstances, you would think that they wouldn’t be so sensitive about getting a little of it back in return.

  21. 23

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    McCain did one heroic thing in his entire life: The enemy offered to repatriate him because his father was an admiral, but he refused to be sent home ahead of his POW buddies. Of course I admire and respect him for that, as we all should. The rest of his life has been a total clusterfuck. While he was a POW his wife was severely injured and disfigured in a car accident, and the first thing McCain did after coming home was divorce her and go romping off with a honey who happened to be the daughter of a very rich guy. It now looks like, more recently, he may have been cheating on her, too — but even if he wasn’t, he betrayed the voters he misled into thinking that he’s a different kind of politician who doesn’t hobnob with lobbyists or sell out to special interests. Turns out he’s just like the rest of them, except he lied about it and pretended to be something he’s not. There’s something about holier-than-thou preachy types who turn out to have feet of clay that provokes our visceral outrage. He would have been better off if he had kept his mouth shut instead of lying to us, and let us find out he’s just another politician with a “For Rent” sign on his office door. What I’m getting at is there’s absolutely nothing in this guy’s resume that qualifies him to be president. He’s never been governor or even a mayor, so he has no executive experience. Senators don’t write budgets or exercise oversight of federal agencies; those are House responsibilies. As a Senator, he pretty much sat around with the rest of the Senators endlessly debating legislative minutae while doing almost nothing. Like I said, we should all admire and respect McCain’s one shining heroic moment in his entire life when he decided to stay with his buddies in the POW camp, but that doesn’t qualify him to be president any more than it qualifies him to be CEO of General Motors. He doesn’t begin to have Obama’s practical experience in communiting organizing and passing legislation that establishes programs to solve practical problems in real communities. I think the GOP nomination is a fine way to honor McCain for his heroic sacrifice in the POW camp, kind of like an honorary LL.D. or Ph.D., but that’s as far as it should go. Just as you wouldn’t appoint a person with an honorary law degree to the Supreme Court, or hire a person with an honorary Ph.D. to a teaching position at Harvard University, the bestowing of this accolade on Senator McCain should be limited to its honorary function and shouldn’t turn into a job offer. His GOP nomination is suitable for framing and displaying on his office wall — and that’s all.

  22. 24

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @14 “Roger Rabbit, we won’t make friends in the armed services if we tell those serving abroad under orders that their children can’t grow up to be President.”

    I’m just a reporter, and all I’m doing is stating facts. Don’t blame me for what the law is. As Mr. Magoo said, “The law, sir, is an ass.” I’m not responsible for that.

  23. 25

    Ed Weston spews:

    Ask John how he’s going to help John Aagee bring back Jesus. How much support will he give to the Rapture.

  24. 26

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @16 rhp, you may think it’s cut-and-dried, but legal scholars would disagree. Nearly everyone — including me — thinks children of American citizens born abroad should be considered “natural born citizens” and be on equal footing with citizens born on U.S. soil. And I don’t think anyone in the Democratic Party wants to challenge McCain’s eligibility to run for president. But our personal feelings and opinions are irrelevant; the law controls this matter, and it’s a fact that the law in this area is unsettled and unpredictable:

    “WASHINGTON (Feb. 28) – … Mr. McCain’s likely nomination as the Republican candidate for president … [is] reviving a musty debate that has surfaced periodically since the founders … declared that only a ‘natural-born citizen’ can hold the nation’s highest office.

    “Almost since those words were written in 1787 with scant explanation, their precise meaning has been the stuff of confusion, law school review articles, whisper campaigns and civics class debates ….

    “’There are powerful arguments that Senator McCain or anyone else in this position is constitutionally qualified, but there is certainly no precedent,’ said Sarah H. Duggin, an associate professor of law at Catholic University who has studied the issue extensively. ‘It is not a slam-dunk situation.’ …

    “[McCain’s] … campaign recently asked Theodore B. Olson, a former solicitor general now advising Mr. McCain, to prepare a detailed legal analysis. ‘I don’t have much doubt about it,’ said Mr. Olson, who added, though, that he still needed to finish his research. …

    “Scholars say notes of the Constitutional Convention give away little of the intent of the framers. … Ms. Duggin and others who have explored the arcane subject in depth say legal argument and basic fairness may indeed be on the side of Mr. McCain …. But multiple experts and scholarly reviews say the issue has never been definitively resolved by either Congress or the Supreme Court.

    “Ms. Duggin favors a constitutional amendment to settle the matter. Others have called on Congress to guarantee that Americans born outside the national boundaries can legitimately see themselves as potential contenders for the Oval Office. …

    “The conflict that could conceivably ensnare Mr. McCain goes more to the interpretation of ‘natural born’ when weighed against intent and decades of immigration law. …

    “Lawyers who have examined the topic say there is not just confusion about the provision itself, but uncertainty about who would have the legal standing to challenge a candidate on such grounds, what form a challenge could take and whether it would have to wait until after the election or could be made at any time.

    “In a paper written 20 years ago for the Yale Law Journal on the natural-born enigma, Jill Pryor, now a lawyer in Atlanta, said that any legal challenge to a presidential candidate born outside national boundaries would be ‘unpredictable and unsatisfactory.’

    “’If I were on the Supreme Court, I would decide for John McCain,’ Ms. Pryor said in a recent interview. ‘But it is certainly not a frivolous issue.’”

    Quoted under fair use; for complete article and/or copyright info see

  25. 27

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    Because McCain got his citizenship under a statute, not from the Constitution, and because the Supreme Court has never addressed whether statutory citizens have the same right to hold the presidential office as constitutional citizens, there is an unresolved legal issue about McCain’s eligibility.

  26. 28

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @25 I’ll give McCain all the help I can to bring the Rapture. The sooner it gets here, the better! 144,000 Republicans gone in an instant — that can’t happen too soon for me!! It’s not enough, but it’s a start.

  27. 29

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @21 What law school did you graduate from, son? Can I see your diploma? I don’t see your name in the lawyer directory. Unless you’re a lawyer, don’t try to teach me about law. I’ve been a lawyer for 35 years and I don’t need any help from amateurs.

  28. 30

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @22 Unfortunately, there are plenty of people who would vote for a candidate simply because she looks like Britney Spears. That’s one of the ways we got an idiot like Bush in the Oval Office (although there were other reasons, too, e.g. Republican cheating). Although it’s not in the Constitution, we have a de facto requirement that presidents be over 6 feet tall. Have you ever noticed how the heads of presidential candidates invariably stick up when they’re working a crowd? Being a short guy disqualifies you from running. Until now, at least, so does being a minority or a woman, although we’re about to change that. However, have you noticed how — between the tall black guy and the short woman — the tall candidate is going to win the nomination and be our candidate? I’m tellin’ ya, if you want your kid to grow up to be president, you better make him tall, because if he’s a runt like Kucinich the only thing he can look forward to is marrying a babe.

  29. 31

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    The real reason Kucinich will never be president is his height, not his progressive policies.

  30. 32

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    That’s also why I can’t be president. If a 5’7″ progressive congressman can’t get elected, then a 2’6″ progressive rabbit hasn’t a prayer. And I don’t even have a 6′ tall reheaded babe draped over my arm — Mrs. Rabbit is even shorter than me.

    But I don’t want to be president, because I’m going to be king. When you humans are extinct, rabbits will run this place, and I’ll boss them all around. And I won’t have to raise millions of dollars or win primaries or any of that bullshit. If any rabbit has a problem with me giving the orders I’ll bite, claw, kick, scratch, and head-butt him until he sees reason. I may be a runt compared to Kucinich, but I’m a damn big rabbit as rabbits go, and that’s how things work in the animal world.

  31. 33



    If you wish to look at an ass, look in the mirror…

    The quote comes from Oliver Twist by Charles Dickens, and it appears as follows:

    “If the law supposes that,” said Mr. Bumble, squeezing his hat emphatically in both hands, “the law is a ass- a idiot. If that’s the eye of the law, the law is a bachelor; and the worst I wish the law is, that his eye may be opened by experience- by experience.”

    But, this is typical of you’re pontificating as the know-it-all expert on all things great and small when, in fact, both you and the law qualify for Bumble’s description.

    The Piper

  32. 35

    Mr. Cynical spews:

    Per the Seattle Times today-
    “Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz was an equal-opportunity Democrat: He gave Sen. John Edwards, Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton each a donation of $2,300.”

    This is why I NEVER buy a Starbucks…and enjoy the the freefall decline of Starbucks (SBUX) stock.
    How will Howard explain the tens of thousands of Klowns who cannot afford Health Insurance..but can afford $4 coffee!

  33. 37

    I-Burn spews:

    @36 Did you happen to catch this sentence?

    Sen. John McCain still runs statistically even or better in most of the national polls looking ahead to the general election.

    Seems to me that this might be more of a horse race than y’all are thinking.

  34. 38

    ArtFart spews:

    26 Some writer posted this over at Smirking Chimp today, and it was shot down by everyone who commented on it.

    McCain was born of American parents, on an American military base, which is considered American soil.

    Either we progressives have become ridiculously desperate, or the whole issue is being raised by the other side as an excuse to mount some sort of cockamamie challenge to the “natural-born” stipulation and nominate Schwartzeneggar in 2012.

  35. 39

    PuddyPrick, The Fact Finding Prognosticator... spews:

    Headless@7 I haven’t posted in months Lucy:

    Please place on this blog where someone from us whom think right where we made fun of Max Cleland and his war wounds. If and I mean if you find an idiot from our side who said it I will go on record saying it was an idiotic thing to say.

    Meanwhile why don’t you castigate bma – benign moronic asswipe?

  36. 40

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @33 You exhibit the wingnut’s usual inability to distinguish between messenger and message. But I wouldn’t expect anything more of you, crackpiper. You are, after all, a wingnut.

  37. 41



    In other words, once again you got caught in a factual screw-up and, typical for you, instead of doing the honorable and manly thing by acknowledging your error and standing corrected, you evade the issue, attack the messanger, and attempt to muddy the water.

    Typical effort of someone who is so morally bankrupt that he’s afraid to admit a simple mistake of fact! But we’re used to that…

    The Piper

  38. 42

    PuddyPrick, The Fact Finding Prognosticator... spews:

    So Pelletizer you are trying to tell me:

    the son born to a military father on military duty in a US protectorate is NOT allowed to be the president of the US


    the son of illegal immigrants who sneak into the US so their child can be born in the US as an anchor baby can be one?

    You are an idiot, and the people here who drink your kool-aid and eat your pellets are IDIOTS TOO!

    What a crock!

    Nuff SAID!


  39. 43

    correctnotright spews:

    I don’t care how McCain looks – it is what he does that counts.

    GWB supposedly looked good – but he has been an unmitigated disaster. Even today he was running off at the mouth (I refuse to call what he does speaking) about how we are not going to go into a depression or recession – like he knows anything about the economy that he has ruined by spending 3 billion/day in Iraq.

    When McCain lies about his involvement with a lobbying firm – that bothers me (yeah, he lied – his own deposition contradicted his excuses that he never wrote a letter to the FCC on behalf of “that female lobbyist”. I have already put the link in. either he was lying then or he is lying now – no two ways about it.

    When McCain tries to illegally get arpund campaign finance laws at his convenience – laws that he co-sponsored – that bothers me.

    If his arms are short – who cares.

  40. 45

    correctnotright spews:

    @37: I-burn
    McCain is the putative nominee for the republicans and he has been self-destructing in the last week – His image as the mverick reformer opposed to lobbyists has been shattered. He runs behind Obama by 6-9% in most national polls and ties Clinton. This was before all the crap about his lies came out – his major strength is gone – he will be dead in the water.

  41. 46

    PuddyPrick, The Fact Finding Prognosticator... spews:

    Pelletizer@everywhere I reject:

    the message – these legal scholars who probably never knew anyone in the military or how their children are citizens


    the messenger – you

  42. 47

    Nolaguy spews:

    Is this blog topic criticizing the american voter, or McCain for not looking like Paul Newman?

  43. 48



    Ah, but many of the HA Happy Hooligans sneeringly mock John McCain’s looks and physical attributes, some of which are the result of his treatment while a POW, and the quality of his military service.

    Tell me…is that worthy of commendation or condemnation? The cheap shots, the insinuation that his military service renders him unfit to be CinC, backhanded so-called “compliments” (think Rabbit), and other related tripe.

    And this from the same quarter that howled like stuck pigs over quesitons about John Kerry?

    Give it a rest, people! You continue with this line of attack, and all you’ll be able to do is sleep on a park bench with befuddled Hillary Clinton with only back issues of the now-discredited NY Times to cover you and keep you warm.

    But I doubt that this foolishness will subside since it’s in the nature of the clueless to remain clueless.

    The Piper

  44. 49

    Blastor spews:

    -Then we’ll see how “electable” you think your body makes you. What a disgusting thing to say about McCain, of all people. You should be ashamed. –

    Jeff and the band of screaming Reich Wingers obviously missed the point of this post.

    Nice job, Will. The righties fell for it hook, line and sinker.

    The entire Rovian/GOP campaign against Obama will be based on his skin color, lineage, and (supposed) religion. I believe Will was just playing around with the time-honored conservative method of demonizing “those people” who don’t look “normal.”

    One way the trolls could get around this obvious conundrum: blame Obama for chosing the wrong dad (but the right mom!)

  45. 50

    Blastor spews:

    -Ah, but many of the HA Happy Hooligans sneeringly mock John McCain’s looks and physical attributes, some of which are the result of his treatment while a POW, and the quality of his military service.-

    Hey, the Piper: remember the guys who REALLY sneered over McCain’s Vietnam experience? Who said McCain sold out to the commies by cracking under stress?

    Yeah, that was Rove working for Bush, in 2000.

    Will is kidding. Your sick fuck President’s hit squad campaign was dead serious.

  46. 52

    Rujax! spews:

    Hey Blastor-

    Don’t forget the same fuckheads smeared St. John and his wife and daughter. The reaction from our American Hero??

    I think we’re still waitng.

    So Puddybitch, crackpiper…is this thee ONLY way you assholes can win elections? Smears and THEFT? Can’t win on issues?


  47. 53

    Rujax! spews:

    I actually don’t know why I’m complaining…after the truth comes out about Cheney/Bush and the Klownservative rape and pillage of the economy…it’ll be 20 years before a republican can get elected dogcatcher.

  48. 54

    I-Burn spews:

    @53 If there was anything for the Republicans to worry about, it’d be on the front page EVERY GODDAMNED DAY until the election… That doesn’t seem to be happening.

    Draw your own conclusion.

  49. 55

    Rujax! spews:

    Hey I-Burn…

    He’s not MY president, cause he’s NOT the president. Bush is an illegitimate fake, a pretender…a thief and a liar and a fraud, presiding over the most inept and corrupt administration in our country’s history.

    You are a hopeless dupe if you are one of the faithful 18% who approvee of this asshole.

  50. 56

    Blastor spews:

    “In e-mails, faxes, flyers, postcards, telephone calls and talk radio, groups and individuals circulated all kinds of wild rumors about me, from the old Manchurian Candidate allegation to charges of having sired children with prostitutes,” McCain wrote in Worth the Fighting For. “There wasn’t a damn thing I could do about the subterranean assaults on my reputation except to act in a way that contradicted their libel. When things got so bad that I became discouraged by my own negative ads, we pulled them. But I spent too much of my time denouncing my opponent’s campaign tactics instead of sticking with the message that I believed in and that had worked so well in New Hampshire.”

    And just in case the Pipe Dream still believes Rove’s pit bulls didn’t take a bite out of McCain’s psyche:

  51. 57



  52. 58

    Blastor spews:

    -Hey Blastor… He’s YOUR president too – whether you like it or not!-

    I got that, I-Burn. My point was to illustrate how the conservative movement’s terror-fighting hero was a lot more vicious than Will ever could be. And Will was kidding.

  53. 59

    I-Burn spews:

    @55 I didn’t vote for the man, but i’m not blinded by my ideology either. On the one hand, you dims think Bush is too incompetent to wipe his own ass, but on the other, he’s managed to railroad the most extensive conspiracy in history upon the American people, without having anyone leak. Even if he was a mere puppet, who do you really think has the cachet to pull it off *and* keep it quiet?

    Dude, that’s freakin’ tinfoil hat country, right there.

  54. 60

    Rujax! spews:

    WOW!! That PU!! He REALLY told you huh, Will?

    BOYYYYY HOWDY!!! He’s a firecracker that PU. And SOOOO erudite!

  55. 61

    Blastor spews:

    PU, settle down. Will was making a political point, contrasting the conservative obsession over “normal” looking people with Obama. You know, that black guy. With the Muslim middle name.

    Interesting the right painted McCain with that “Manchurian Candidate” brush. Same hit squad is going to work on Obama as we speak….

  56. 63



  57. 64

    mark spews:

    Ever see the email of republican women vs. democrat women.
    I would have to say the democrats have their own set of
    problems. I just saw that Louis Farrahkan on the tube and
    was wondering if someone were to shoot him dead would we get
    another day off during the year?

  58. 65

    Rujax! spews:

    Here’s a cute story from Crooks and Liars about our favorite catholic scold:


    This is the kind of hate that permeates the extreme wing of the religious right. Bill Donohue is freaking out over Hagee and McCain. Glenn Greenwald interviewed him today:

    The Catholic League demanded that McCain repudiate Hagee and his endorsement, just as Barack Obama did earlier this week with Louis Farrakhan (despite the fact that Obama, unlike McCain with Hagee, never sought out or accepted Farrakhan’s endorsement) In the interview, Donohue made some extraordinary statements. He compared Hagee both to Louis Farrakhan and Bob Jones, but noted: “Hagee is far more powerful than Farrakhan is today. . . . Hagee is a major player. There’s no end to his money. He has an empire down there.” Regarding the intense 2000 media controversy when then-Gov. George Bush spoke at Bob Jones University, Donohue said:

    Why were they so exercised about Bob Jones? This is worse. . . . If someone said to me: who is the biggest anti-Catholic bigot in the evangelical community, I would say: hands down, John Hagee.

    The entire podcast interview, which lasted roughly 15 minutes, can be heard here.


    Too cute!! (That “extreme wing of thee religious right”, that’s our own dear PuddyBitch, btw)

  59. 67



  60. 68

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @38 Did you even read what I posted, Art? I did NOT say challenging McCain’s eligibility is a good idea. I did NOT say he isn’t eligible to be president. I merely quoted a news story that quoted legal experts who know far more about the law on this subject than you or me, who stated there is an unsettled legal question over the eligibility of someone born to American parents outside U.S. borders and that the issue is “not frivolous.” So why are you going sideways on this? Do you think some blogger knows more about it than legal scholars who get paid to think about this stuff?

  61. 69

    ewp spews:

    Title 8, Section 1403 of the US Code grants US Citizenship to any child born in the Panama Canal Zone who has at least one parent that’s a US citizen. Any child born on an overseas US military base to US citizen parents is considered to have been born on US soil. There’s no doubt McCain meets the eligibility standards to be elected President.
    Now whether he should be elected is a whole different story.

  62. 70

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    I don’t think a constitutional expert like Prof. Duggin would consider herself “shot down” because a knee-jerk blogger posts an opinion that viscerally disagrees with her.

  63. 71

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @39 “Please place on this blog where someone from us whom think right where we made fun of Max Cleland and his war wounds.”

    Republicans did, and you support Republicans, and that’s enough. The applicable principle here is, “The friend of my enemy is my enemy.”

  64. 72

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @41 Nonresponsive and factually inaccurate. What “error” are you referring to? You attacked me for posting a news story that quoted legal experts as saying there’s a legal issue. I didn’t say they’re right or wrong, I merely posted what they said. Where is the “error?” Like I said above, you’re too fucking stupid to tell the difference between messenger and message. It isn’t my message, jackass, I merely delivered it.

  65. 73

    proud leftist spews:

    I-Burn @ 59: “you dims think Bush is too incompetent to wipe his own ass”

    No, he can wipe his own ass. It’s just that he can’t remember that you wipe after you shit, not before.

  66. 74

    YLB spews:

    The last word on John McCain:

    The conversation ebbs back to friendly chit-chat. So, you’re a European, one of the Park Avenue ladies says, before offering witty commentaries on the cities she’s visited. Her companion adds, “I went to Paris, and it was so lovely.” Her face darkens: “But then you think – it’s surrounded by Muslims.”…

    Now that this barrier has been broken – everyone agrees the Muslims are devouring the French, and everyone agrees it’s funny – the usual suspects are quickly rounded up. Jimmy Carter is “almost a traitor”…

    John McCain is “crazy” because of “all that torture”.

    One of the Park Avenue ladies declares that she gets on her knees every day to ” thank God for Fox News”. As the wine reaches the Floridian, he announces, “This cruise is the best money I ever spent.

    LMAO!!! So typical of the right wing delusional group think we see here from Poopster and PuddyWhackjob!!!

  67. 75

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @42 “So Pelletizer you are trying to tell me: the son born to a military father on military duty in a US protectorate is NOT allowed to be the president of the US”

    No, I am not telling you that, and please don’t try to put words in my mouth when you don’t know what the fuck you’re saying. You’re as stupid as crackpiper, and your reading comprehension is no better than his, either.

    For the umpteenth time, I merely quoted a news story that quoted legal experts who know what they’re talking about as saying that it’s unclear whether McCain is eligible to be president or not. That’s not my opinion; that’s their opinion. And they did NOT express an opinion that he’s ineligible. What they did do is provide a technical explanation of the legal problem that neither you nor Piper are capable of understanding. I’m glad he’s not a lawyer anymore, because he lacks a fundamental legal skill: Knowing when a legal issue exists. You have a better excuse than he does; you were never a lawyer in the first place, so you’re expected to be incompetent in legal matters. Piper can’t get off that easy because he’s supposed to know better. It appears that someone, somewhere, wasted three years of legal education on him that could have been better used by someone with more cognitive capacity than he has.

  68. 76



    You, in your snarky condescending way, attributed a quote to Mr. Magoo, which is totally inaccurate. The quote was from Charles Dickens and comes out of the mouth of his character, Mr. Bumble, in Oliver Twist.

    Instead of acknowledging the error, you cut and run.

    The Piper

  69. 77

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @45 “McCain is the putative nominee for the republicans and he has been self-destructing in the last week”

    Not really. McCain has been self-destructing all his life, and that’s only consistent theme in his life story. The lobbyist scandal is in character, not out of character, for him; it’s consistent with everything else he’s done over the years. The only thing that has changed is that now he’s the GOP putative nominee he’s getting more scrutiny and the media considers his antics newsworthy. Before, they weren’t worth reporting because he didn’t have any real responsibilities to the country.

  70. 79

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    In other words, McCain is just being McCain; and what McCain is wasn’t newsworthy in the past, but has become newsworthy because he’s now a de facto presidential nominee.

  71. 80

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @46 “the message – these legal scholars who probably never knew anyone in the military or how their children are citizens”

    What does that have to do with anything?

  72. 81

    harry poon spews:

    “They got little hands
    And little eyes
    And they walk around
    Tellin’ great big lies
    They got little noses
    And tiny little teeth
    They wear platform shoes
    On their nasty little feet” from ‘Short People’ by Randy Newman

    Good observation, Will. I’m from AZ and I can tell you that McCain would laugh his ass off at this little joke. On his first run for the Senate (and this was in the Gazette and the Republic) he was heard to refer to a retirement villa named ‘Leisure World’ as ‘Seizure World’. Alot of mock outrage over that little comment, but, as McCain himself would say: “Fuck ‘em if they can’t take a joke — and dry fuck Piper Scott in his rectum with a sandpaper dildo.”

    I kid you not, that’s a direct quote.

  73. 82

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    What I’m seeing in this thread is several people (on both sides) reacting emotionally to a technical legal issue. Of course, this happens every day to judges and lawyers, and once you understand that lawyers spend far more time trying to get past people’s emotional walls than they do on legal research or writing briefs, you may begin to understand why lawyers are worth every penny of what they earn. The job of being a lawyer is 90% dealing with human nature and only 10% practicing law, and the human nature they have to deal with is 98.5% bullshit and only 1.5% intellectual functioning. This is a technical legal issue, dopes! It has nothing and I do mean NOT A FUCKING GODDAMN THING to do with how you emotionally feel about children of military personnel. It’s about what the law is, and all I’m saying is, the best qualified legal scholars in the country to comment on this subject are saying, “There’s a serious issue there, and nobody knows what the law is, because there are no binding interpretations.”

  74. 83

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    Some people here can’t understand plain English no matter how many times I repeat the same thing which leads me to wonder whether their cognitive reasoning is impaired. Of course, in the case of pudwhacker and crackpiper, I don’t have to wonder; I already know that.

  75. 85

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @48 I’m curious about something, piper. How come you aren’t criticizing McCain for cooperating with the enemy and signing a “confession” he knew would be used for propaganda purposes? He did, you know. He took more of a beating than Jane Fonda, but at the end of the day, he did about the same thing she did.

  76. 86

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @49 Yes, the irony of people who lie about Obama’s religion complaining about poking fun at the fat old white guy’s appearance is, well, ironic.

  77. 87

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @51 Aren’t you getting ahead of yourself? The election hasn’t even occurred yet. I also wonder whether you aren’t getting a little overconfident.

  78. 89

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @57 As long as we’re flashing DD-214s around here, what does yours say? Do you even have one?

  79. 90

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @59 “think Bush is too incompetent to wipe his own ass”

    Why shouldn’t we think that? There’s lots of empirical evidence to support it.

  80. 91

    The Blatantly Obvious spews:

    @ 76, Acutally Pooper, Dickens cribbed the line form Shakepeare’s Much Ado About Nothing Act IV acene II, wherein a petitioner calls Constable Dogberry and ass:

    Away! you are an ass, you are an ass.

    Dost thou not suspect my place? dost thou not
    suspect my years? O that he were here to write me
    down an ass! But, masters, remember that I am an
    ass; though it be not written down, yet forget not
    that I am an ass. No, thou villain, thou art full of
    piety, as shall be proved upon thee by good witness.
    I am a wise fellow, and, which is more, an officer,
    and, which is more, a householder, and, which is
    more, as pretty a piece of flesh as any is in
    Messina, and one that knows the law, go to; and a
    rich fellow enough, go to; and a fellow that hath
    had losses, and one that hath two gowns and every
    thing handsome about him. Bring him away. O that
    I had been writ down an ass!

    I wouldn’t doubt that at some point Mr. Magoo stole it again from Dickens.

    Talk about much ado about nothing….

  81. 92

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @63 If I need an amateur’s advice on a complex technical legal issue, I’ll let you know. Until then, find someone to do brain surgery on.

  82. 93

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @64 This is what passes for the wingnut intelligentsia. No comment necessary; it speaks for itself.

  83. 94

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @69 Are you a lawyer? Do you know what you’re talking about? I don’t know the answer to my first question, but I do know the answer to my second question. Since the eligibility criteria for being president are set forth in the Constitution, and you can’t add to or change the Constitution with a statute, 8 USC Sec. 1403 can’t make someone eligible to be president. In lawyerspeak, the Constitution “controls.” Or, to put it another way, the statute is superseded by the Constitution. But then, that raises the question of whether a statute can be used to clarify what an unclear or ambiguous provision of the Constitution means. Undoubtedly, there’s a body of legal thinking and caselaw on that subject, too.

  84. 95

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    Roger Rabbit Bar Exam Question

    OK, for all you lawyer wannabes out there, here’s a fun little quiz. There’s only 1 right answer, and dollars for donuts, I betcha every last one of you will fuck this up.

    Question: Is a person born to American citizens outside the borders of the U.S. eligible to be president?

    [ ] 1. Of course; it isn’t even debatable.
    [ ] 2. Hell no!
    [ ] 3. I have no fucking idea.
    [ ] 4. Nobody knows.

  85. 96

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @76 Magoo was a fucking plagiarist. What of it? I quoted Magoo accurately. His lack of ethics isn’t my problem.

  86. 97

    PuddyPrick, The Fact Finding Prognosticator... spews:

    YLB says: “The last word on John McCain”

    So Ccueless Idiot, you’ll be quiet on McCain from now on?

    Naaaaaah didn’t think so.

  87. 98

    Mike in Seattle spews:

    so… another batch of pointless irrelevant arguments between idiots. wow, this blog is really cutting edge. maybe roger and pudbutt and pippi need to move in together so the rest of us don’t have to read dozens of irrelevant schoolyard arguments and the pointlessly longwinded longwinded rebuttals every night just to try and follow a discussion. they belong together, and hopefully somewhere other than here. roger you are every bit as much of an idiot as your buddies, as a quick look through your thousands of posts here makes clear. thanks for all the worthless spam fellas! now please go away so that the grownups can talk, and take your little friend PU with yas. cheers!

  88. 100

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @91 So it turns out Dickens plagiarized it from Shakespeare? And some reputable people speculate that some or all of Shakespeare’s stuff was ghost-written! Trying to figure out who said it first is like trying to identify the inventor of the wheel. The wheel was invented many times, because it’s obvious. Likewise, I have no doubt that countless people began saying “the law is an ass” very soon after law came into existence because that, too, is obvious. As crackpiper is supposed to know, the convention among lawyers is to cite the most recent case, not the original case. The fact Magoo repeated what Dickens said who in turn repeated what Shakespeare said who in turn merely stated the obvious simply confirms the continuing vitality of Magoo’s/Dickens’/Shakespeare’s/unknown’s observation.

  89. 101

    Roger Rabbit spews:

    @98 Reading the comments on this blog is a voluntary activity. A cogent argument can be made that the people who insist on reading them are no smarter than the people who insist on posting them. If you don’t know how to use the scroll key on your computer, ask a kid to show you.

  90. 102

    Mike in Seattle spews:

    already know how to use the scroll key thumper, have to use it a lot when you and your pals are bickering pointlessly. every day.

  91. 104

    PuddyPrick, The Fact Finding Prognosticator... spews:

    Harry Poon you followed the career of McCain? Where did you go to college?

  92. 105

    The Blatantly Obvious spews:

    Hey Buddypud, what would you think about someone who said in the same thread

    Need to see the political swingings of the Top 12 American Billionaires again? Most of them are donkey lovers..


    I will take the word of a billionaire over an academic. One has made it the other dreams it. I’d rather learn from one who’s made it.

    Probalby think they were a “donkey lover”, wouldn’t you?

    Or a pathetically confused loon!!!

    But that is exactly hat you said, Buddypud!!!

    Man you are a confused loon!!

  93. 106

    Jane Balough's Dog spews:

    I wonder why dems like presidents with long arms??? Oh, thats right, to pick your pocket for taxes. No wonder they loved lurch (John Kerry).

  94. 107

    Yellowdogdem spews:

    I’m an Obama supporter and still think you’re over the top. His arms were damaged during his torture as was his face. I don’t like his politics but lets rise above this level of attack.

  95. 108

    The Blatantly Obvious spews:

    @ 103 “McCain is the only chose. Just think about it.”

    I will remember that when I need a Senator to buy off with a young female lobbyist!

  96. 109

    Jane Balough's Dog spews:

    Here is something you donks probably dont care about:

    Republicans with an AGI of at least $364,657, the
    top 1 percent of republicans, accounted for 21.2 percent
    of AGI for 2005. This represents an increase
    in income share of 2.2 percentage points from the
    previous year. These republicans accounted for 39.4
    percent of the total income tax reported, an increase
    from 36.9 percent in 2004. The top 5 percent of republicans
    accounted for 35.7 percent of AGI and 59.7
    percent of total income tax. To be included in the top
    5 percent, a republican must have reported an AGI of at
    least $145,283, whereas, in 2004, the cutoff for this
    group was $137,056.

  97. 112

    proud leftist spews:

    slingshot: “Most legal scholars agree that Bush can wipe his own ass. Whenever Cheney tells him to.”

    Do you think Cheney actually hands him the wipe? Sadly, all of us can picture GW on the throne looking up with those lost eyes to a sneering Dick Cheney, beseeching him, “please, oh please, Mr. Cheney, can I have another square of wipe?”

  98. 113

    slingshot spews:

    They probably hold hands while little Dubby drops his smart bomb..just like they did during their 9/11 investigation interview.

  99. 114

    Matty spews:

    Good job Will. Tear him down on his physical looks rather than the issues. Way to show your shallowness Will.

  100. 115

    slingshot spews:

    Yea Will, you cold-hearted bastard. That was pretty crude. Your basic thesis, however, is that lots of Americans are shallow enough to base their vote on appearances. And by gosh, you’re prolly right. Sadly.

  101. 118

    ArtFart spews:

    59 “Dude, that’s freakin’ tinfoil hat country, right there.”

    No, it’s not.

    “you dims think Bush is too incompetent to wipe his own ass”

    We’re rather bothered that he regularly used the Constitution for toilet paper.

    I don’t care if he can suck his own dick. He’s the worse excuse for a president this or any other country has ever had.

  102. 119

    Proud to be an Ass spews:

    McCain’s wikipedia entry has a picture of him standing with some fellow pilots in front of a jet fighter….this was before his capture.

    He really does have short arms.

  103. 120

    Daddy Love spews:

    Don’t make fun of McCcain’s genetically truncated limbs, because that would be somehow smearing his “honorable” service, even though he chose to sit in an NVA prison rather than help his buddies fight the fucking useless war of imperialism that Republicans now defend.

    But DO make fun of John Kerry’s service and claim that the Silver Star, Bronze Star, and three Purple Hearts earned saving his fellow sldiers in combat are fraudulent and worthless.

    Also, if the law regarding McCain’s citizenship status proves inconvenient, ignore the law.

    This is why Republicans are not fit to run this country. We’ve seen it all for the last twenty years, and have a fucking bellyful in the last eight.

  104. 121

    Daddy Love spews:

    Addedndum for Puddy

    And if the US Constitution says that people born in the US are citizens, ignore the Constitution.

    More Republican anti-Americanism.

  105. 122

    Blue John spews:

    Dear Hillary,
    If you sue to contest the caucus rules in Texas, if you cannot win without cheating and breaking the rules in Florida and Michigan, then you are as evil as the Republicans have been saying all along. If you become the nominee through corrupt means, I will not reward you with my vote and will vote for McCain and damn the consequences. I am aware of what that may do to the country to leave a Republican in change of the Presidency.

  106. 123

    ByeByeGOP spews:

    I love the faux outrage of the dick suckers on the right who pretend we shouldn’t make fun of that affair – having, batshit crazy, flip flopper Johnboy McCain.

    The righties didn’t have any trouble lying about and swift boating Max Cleland. And they are merciless against ANY Dem who comes into their sights.

    Fuck them and fuck Johnboy McCain. Make as much fun of this asshole as you like. Let the republican asswipes get a bit of their own medicine.

  107. 124

    PuddyPrick, The Fact Finding Prognosticator... spews:

    BO@105: Here is deodorant for your BO.

    Sam Zell is the Billionaire I said I would take the word of a billionaire over an academic. One has made it the other dreams it. I’d rather learn from one who’s made it.

    He gives to conservative house and senate members. I didn’t know this when I posted his name. I looked up his political contributions.

    I told you this in the posts 151, 155 & 160. Yet in your little teeny mind you are trying to make the same worthless point you failed to make earlier.

    Keep up the good work. You make the 16%ers proud.

  108. 125

    PuddyPrick, The Fact Finding Prognosticator... spews:


    Harry Poon is another name for headless lucy. He too lived in AZ (as headless) and he is the only one here who calls me PudWax. He is a racist 24/7.

  109. 126

    PuddyPrick, The Fact Finding Prognosticator... spews:

    headless talking to yourself 110 – 117.

    Headless Lee or Darryl already wrote Marvin is from LA.

    waaaaa haaaa haaaaaa haaaa haaaaa haaaaaa haaaa.

    What a crock!

  110. 127

    I-Burn spews:

    @118 Why didn’t you bother addressing the rest of my post?

    You apparently believe that Bush is an incompetent boob, and Machiavelli on steroids, simultaneously.

    And you don’t see how completely paranoid that sounds?

  111. 128

    Rick D. spews:

    Will’s just mad that McCain at 72 is getting better trim than Will banging away at his keyboard in his Mom’s basement will ever see live and in person. Luckily for Will, in this day and age of technology, a few websites and an economy sized jar of vaseline gets him through the lonely nights just fine.

    I just hope he isn’t a “pet lover”

  112. 129

    PuddyPrick, The Fact Finding Prognosticator... spews:

    Daddy Love says: “Addedndum for Puddy. And if the US Constitution says that people born in the US are citizens, ignore the Constitution. More Republican anti-Americanism.”

    What a crock. Why do you twist what I said. You and I both know that’s not what I said and you are full of BULLSHITTIUM.

    Hannah, a term used to describe the left-wing pellets left by Pelletizer and his 16%er friends.

  113. 130

    rhp6033 spews:

    RR @ 27: Late back to the game, but here’s a question for you.

    Where in the U.S. Constitution does it define citizenship? It’s not exactly like the difference between Article III original federal court jurisdiction and statutory jurisdiction, is it?

    The only reference I found, other than the provision that defines the requirements for President, is in the 14th Amendment, Article XIV, Sec. 1, which states (in part):

    “Section 1. All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the State wherein they reside….”

    In United States v. Wong Kim Ark, 169 U.S. 649 (1898), the court held that a son of Chinese immigrants who was born on U.S. soil could not be denied citizenship by statute. In deciding the issue, the court went back to English common law to determine the meaning of citizenship.

    Of course, that leaves open the question of what “in the United States” means. Does it include territories of the United States which are not states? If not, then Barry Goldwater was also ineligible to be President; he was born in Arizona before it became a state. (I would have to check some other 19th century presidents & presidential candidates to see if they, too, might have been disqualified).

    Also, is “and subject to the jurisdiction thereof” a clause of limitation to the phrase preceeding it, or an expansive phrase, adding an additional basis for citizenship? If the latter applies, then a child of U.S. citizens born abroad would probably be “subject to the jurisdiction thereof” (in rem)?

  114. 131

    PuddyPrick, The Fact Finding Prognosticator... spews:

    Rick D. – When my wife saw Cindy McCain, she asked how old is she. When I told her close to her age she said wow.

    Oh BTW, my wife still turns heads.

    But I do remember Will saying he is married.

  115. 132

    Rick D. spews:

    re Puddyprick @ 131

    The question then begs, why not have a side by side picture posting comparison of Will’s wife next to McCain’s wife? As long as we’re getting into the down and dirty side of it, why not take it to the next logical conclusion Will? What say you?

    We’ll see if you have the stones to do it.

  116. 133

    Bagdad Bush spews:

    I think there is a strong comparison between Cindi McCain and the other woman who JohnBoy diddled while doing favors for the companies she lobbies for.

  117. 134

    Blue John spews:

    @11,121 I was having an email exchange with a conservative friend. In the same email where he felt that it was silly to claim that John McCain was not legally able to run for Prez because he was not born here, he said:

    I personally would like to see an amendment to the effect that, even if you’re born here, you are not automatically a citizen if neither of your parents are. That seems more logical, and gets rid of the motivation for “anchor babies”.

    Seems like a double standard. McCain is an American, even though he’s not born here, but kids born to illegals on American soil are not.

  118. 135

    Daddy Love spews:

    129 pud

    the son born to a military father on military duty in a US protectorate is NOT allowed to be the president of the US
    Unclear at this time.

    the son of illegal immigrants who sneak into the US so their child can be born in the US as an anchor baby can be one?

    Absolutely written into the 14th amendment, and I quote:

    “All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the State wherein they reside.”

  119. 136

    Daddy Love spews:

    135 BlueJohn

    I am sure the children of slaves in the 1860s would be glad to hear your friend’s suggestion.

    I would also suggest that this is another reason to give undocumented workers a path to citizenship, rather than a reason to create yet another legal blunt instrument with which to club them.

  120. 137

    PuddyPrick, The Fact Finding Prognosticator... spews:

    Bagdad Bush: You claimed Halliburton $8 Gas – no where found on Google.

    Now you claim “other woman who JohnBoy diddled”


    Or are you starting your Tommy Thompson Streak. He 0 for 256. you’ll be 0 for 2.

  121. 138


    I will not feed the trolls …. however I don’t really care what the guy looks like, the main reason I’m not going to vote for him is because of his inability to take a position. It was messed up I saw a video of him on youtube, 1 minute he’s saying he supports gay marriage, and 10 minutes later he says he’s against it. Come on make a stand 1 way or the other, and stick to it. At least try to keep the same position for a day before changing it.

  122. 139



    Right on! Welcome to the radright!

    As Tony the Tiger said GREAAATTTTTT!!!!!

    This is exactly the kind of thing your former dimbulb friends can not nderstand. Appearances, appearance, appearabces. Ronny Reagan was ahero because he looked and sounded like one. Standing on the Berlin Wall he did what no other President could do .. he blew the damn thing down!

    Calling John McCacca a war hero just because he says he was mistreated in a Hilton Hotel in Hanoi?? Pffffffghhh! Does he look mistreated????

    Hillberry too … look at them short stubby legs! Wannabet we will NEVER see her in a bathing suit? You know what SHE would do if the phone rang at 3 AM? “Billllll … can you get it???”

    And then there is the Obiwan character. I hear he is planning to govern using the force and has plans to bring Kucinich into the cabinet as Yoda in chief!

    Where are John Wayne, Ronald Reagan, Alfred Newman, Abe Lincoln, when we need a manly President???

    And the “wives!” Hillberry’s wife looks more like Bill Clinton than can make her comfortable. Huckleberry has Ma Kettle at his side. McCacca’s wife looks well preserved .. ready for the funeral processedings. The only one who lloks like a woman is Michelle Obama but how will they ntell her from ne of the servants if she is “first lady?”

    I think we need to start this election all over again, at least in WAstate we have a real man running for governor.